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Why Nice Guys Should Finish First — but Don't

time.com — Historian Barbara Taylor and psychoanalyst Adam Phillips examine the evolution of attitudes toward kindness to find out why no one's a good Samaritan anymore

Who dugg this? Made popular Jun 6, 2009

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  • bbueno, on 06/06/2009, -2/+118"Why is nice bad? What kind of a sick society are we living in when nice is bad?"
    -George Costanza
  • bubbameister33, on 06/06/2009, -5/+81I thought this was pussy related, my mistake.
  • emecks, on 06/05/2009, -7/+67And there was me thinking this was about the horizontal olympics...
  • diggadigga, on 06/06/2009, -5/+55You can be a nice guy, just make the foundation of your niceness from strength, not weakness. And have it be genuine niceness. For example, don't do something only for a hot girl because you want her to like you, be willing to perform the favor because you want to see people do well.
  • CleoQKazoo, on 06/06/2009, -0/+33totally heard it in his voice
  • mike23w, on 06/06/2009, -4/+28buried for a digg title that's completely unrelated to the article.
  • charlie6969, on 06/06/2009, -1/+22You know what? Kindness doesn't necessarily mean anything to the receiver, at the time, but it does to the giver.
    Whether you believe in God, Allah, Nature, the Spaghetti Monster or the inherent goodness of man, you know the pleasure that comes from helping someone.
    We know what is right and wrong.
    Doing right is usually harder; I grant you.
    Sigh, but we humans, we gotta start somewhere.
    Just my .02.
  • BlackJackJester, on 06/06/2009, -2/+16Same reason pacifists should be in charge, but aren't. When the people who are in the right, are the people without the guns - they get stomped by those who are in the wrong, but have the guns.
  • joshthegreat200, on 06/06/2009, -11/+24Stupid article.
  • JoeMondo, on 06/06/2009, -1/+13Only in the same way that saying George Washington was a good thing - depending on whether you were an American or the King of England.
  • bdbr, on 06/06/2009, -0/+12But I should only do nice things for hot girls, right? /s
  • inactive, on 06/06/2009, -0/+11whats this have to do with swimming
  • christoast, on 06/06/2009, -0/+10Like Eddie Izzard said, you need an army because ***** keep organizing.
  • dent42, on 06/06/2009, -0/+10What you're advocating is a perversion of kindness. Kindness is an end in itself, not a tactic to further your ambitions.
  • christoast, on 06/06/2009, -2/+12If you know about the work of Richard Dawkins, you'd know this "nice guys are less successful" hypothesis is *****. Nice guys finish first.
  • mogdor, on 06/06/2009, -3/+12This was about nice people in general, not "nice guys"....misleading title.
  • Lefts, on 06/06/2009, -0/+9Well, it is, just the type no one cares about.
  • piieerrrree, on 06/06/2009, -3/+11"(See 20 ways to get and stay happy.) "

    Time.com, I am disappoint.
  • Raptor007, on 06/06/2009, -0/+7You mean you refuse to read any of the ones below his..?
  • imikedaman, on 06/06/2009, -0/+7You can tell you're getting old when you believe there are no good Samaritans anymore.
  • charlie6969, on 06/06/2009, -0/+7You know; I had to think about it a second but then I laughed my ass off! Thanks :)
  • chriswastaken, on 10/27/2009, -1/+8honestly, no one uses the bury button enough.
  • PlanckTime, on 06/06/2009, -7/+13"I think that there are many wonderfully encouraging things going on right now, and certainly Obama's presidency is right up there."

    Doesn't that kind of depend on whether you view Obama's presidency as a good thing? It's not very encouraging if your name is Rush Limbaugh (although it may be good for the ratings).
  • asgardshill, on 06/06/2009, -2/+8It's a riff on the old saying "Nice guys finish last". There's nothing misleading about it.
  • Ajajadude, on 06/06/2009, -0/+6It applies to just getting into that situation, too.
  • lead2thehead, on 06/06/2009, -2/+8The moon landing was faked! Tupac is still alive! Somebody pay attention to me!
  • inactive, on 06/06/2009, -0/+5You don't be nice to expect to finish first.
  • mike23w, on 06/07/2009, -0/+5Costanza - the Confucius of our times.
  • inactive, on 06/06/2009, -1/+5You mean the vagina?
  • inactive, on 06/06/2009, -0/+4No, you're an Internet Tough Guy.
  • chrismgtis, on 06/06/2009, -2/+6"I think that there are many wonderfully encouraging things going on right now, and certainly Obama's presidency is right up there."

    Discredited right there. If you can name one thing positive which Obama has done that he promised to do in his presidency, I'll buy that book. All I've seen Obama do is become a liar.

    FYI, masquerading a positive campaign about hope and change means nothing. What that president DOES in office means everything. Otherwise it was just a ploy to get in office, which it seems to have been.
  • BlueWindKami, on 06/06/2009, -0/+4"i rewrote one of her favorite books to be a story about us "

    That's not "nice", that's delusional.

  • MasterInsan0, on 06/06/2009, -0/+4Not necessarily old, just cynical and/or jaded.
  • mblevine, on 06/06/2009, -2/+6I always finish first.
  • ASSASSYN360, on 06/06/2009, -0/+4George Cantstandya!
  • inactive, on 06/07/2009, -0/+4Well he is fat and bald... Wait, maybe that's Buddha. I always get those eastern religion people confused.
  • andersleet, on 06/06/2009, -0/+4well put
  • yaminohikari, on 06/06/2009, -0/+3What are you talking about? Dick or not, Richard Dawkins is right.

    /fixed.
  • momedefome, on 06/06/2009, -1/+4Being a nice guy is the loneliest thing in the world , no one gives a *****!!!!!!!!! Why do I do it????? Well , it's the right thing to do , that's what makes me that guy
  • memper, on 06/06/2009, -2/+5"You wait your turn, you'll be last in line. Get out the way cause I'm getting mine. This is the Beginning of the End. " -Trent Reznor
  • dsmith5237, on 06/06/2009, -0/+3Buried for misleading title and disappointingly boring Time article.
  • mouseshoes, on 06/06/2009, -1/+4The last shall be first and the first shall be last.

    Not big on religion yet I still find this quote completely fitting.
  • mogdor, on 06/06/2009, -0/+3I know the old saying, but having this saying in the title implies that the article is about men not succeeding romantically with females. The article is about both men and women having a tough time in different types of relationships with people (not just romantic) because of being overly nice.

    The article is not what the title led me to believe it would be about......if that's not what misleading means then maybe I need a new dictionary.
  • PlanckTime, on 06/06/2009, -3/+5More like saying that Neville Chamberlain was a good thing depending on whether you wanted a leader with a spine or not.
  • pilotlicense, on 06/16/2009, -0/+2Oh, I see what you did there.
  • Josh396, on 06/06/2009, -0/+2and you're hot fiance is probably a bitch that likes to control people, hence her marrying a self proclaimed nice guy
  • fiatjustitia, on 06/10/2009, -0/+2or manipulative.

    a lot of my female friends have been screwed over horribly by that guy who can play the "nice guy" routine. Their just sugar-coated douchebags, nothing more.

    as for me, I'll remain confident, not a pushover, and not a dick either, and so far that's worked for me.
  • cheerfulcynic, on 06/06/2009, -0/+2trying to read craigslist personal ads have made me completely sick of any incarnation of the phrase "nice guys finishing last"
  • ripple123, on 06/06/2009, -0/+2peons are always revolting. :)
  • TheMachine1, on 06/06/2009, -0/+2http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-349453027 ...
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