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90 Comments
- zwendkos, on 02/20/2008, -1/+79I read "Make Yourself SICK With These First Impression Tips" and it reminded me of the time I approached a girl at a bar only to puke all over her immediately after a shot of tequila. We've been married for 7 years now.
- BigHurt12, on 02/20/2008, -1/+53 Get a haircut like the guy in the picture and turn your skin to sepia color. You'll look more distinguished. That should leave a good first impression
- spammishking, on 02/20/2008, -6/+50I usually just show up naked. For some reason they never get me out of their mind. I think it's the third nipple.
( o ) ( o )
( o ) - DermDoc, on 02/20/2008, -1/+43Isn't "Hi, I'm Zaibatsu," enough?
- Stupidumb, on 02/20/2008, -1/+31whip it out
- angusm, on 02/20/2008, -1/+24They say that first impressions count. But last impressions are important too: the interviewer won't easily forget watching you being dragged screaming from the building by the security team.
- SilverBack101, on 02/20/2008, -0/+17Stuff the biggest and thickest tube sock you have into your pants and thrust at your potential employer showing him/her that you are a real man. Don't stop there...when you're in the waiting room also thrust at potential enemies to show them they can't compete against you. Thrusting at the secretary can also deliver you potential points of having your application and resume on top of the pile.
- Stupidumb, on 02/20/2008, -0/+17Then start to fellate the interviewer relentlessly.
- elizabethb221, on 02/20/2008, -0/+15I sincerely hope this is a true story.
- controversy187, on 02/20/2008, -0/+12#1: Name repetition
#2: Personality mirroring
#3: Never breaking off a handshake. - inactive, on 02/20/2008, -3/+14That guy in the picture looks like a smug douche bag.
- inactive, on 02/20/2008, -2/+13You're probably gonna screw up eventually, but why not make a good first impression.
- BigHurt12, on 02/20/2008, -3/+13Another tip. Suck on a mint before you go in to your interview. Halitosis will definitely not help you score points.
- scitz0frenic, on 02/20/2008, -1/+10I say kick the interviewer in the nuts if it isn't going well. He will talk about you the rest of his life.
- benpattersonca, on 02/20/2008, -7/+15GREAT tips, very effective. Worth reading before walking into interviews if only to review.
- aflusche, on 02/20/2008, -3/+11Putting a huge tattoo on your bald head could help too. But you might be remembered for the wrong reason.
- dondara, on 02/20/2008, -0/+8Don't interrupt, turn the conversation back to them and ask them questions are great tips. Works on women as well.
- grakker, on 02/20/2008, -0/+7Some friends and I were doing this on a train ride in high school from Germany to Paris. It was funny as hell until one of my friends started to get hit on by a guy who was REALLY interested.
- ghank, on 02/20/2008, -1/+7dugg down for "For great clothing tips, watch TLC’s What Not To Wear."
Seriously, my wife watches this show, and the second i hear the opening theme song, it's time to retire to the man cave, garage, out of the house, anywhere away from that annoying chick( the host, not my wife ;) ). - rlvis, on 02/20/2008, -0/+5I believe you. This girl came up to me in the bar as I could barely keep my head off the table. She asks whats why I look so depressed. I answer that I'm out of money and can't buy more beer. She holds up $5 which I grab out of her hand and leave her standing by the table (which is now empty) as I head off the the bar. We've been married for 9 years now.
Women love that stuff. - retrolab, on 02/20/2008, -0/+5"For great clothing tips, watch TLC’s What Not To Wear."
I stopped after reading that. - VogonBard, on 02/20/2008, -2/+7I thought it said "Make yourself sick", so I was very curious!
- inactive, on 02/20/2008, -0/+5mac fanboys need jobs too!.
- dukeochutney, on 02/20/2008, -0/+4thot this was 'act like a douche to get a job'
- SeaBass22, on 02/20/2008, -0/+4"I can't come to bed...someone is wrong on the Internet"
- Stupidumb, on 02/20/2008, -1/+4What about the middle impressions. What about the 5th impression? What about Bob?
- jj101, on 02/21/2008, -1/+4Lol! Relentlessly!
- wrzhydr, on 02/21/2008, -0/+3when in doubt, right?
- Ramble, on 02/20/2008, -0/+3It works on anyone. Brilliant way to make friends.
- Vodka2389, on 02/20/2008, -0/+3Na, you're wrong I tell ya! That kid is a go-getter, see.
Now shine my shoes for a nickel, sport. - Wuss, on 02/20/2008, -1/+4Hmmm.. dress well, speak well, act like your listening...
truly insightful u asshat - inactive, on 02/20/2008, -0/+3The only tip you need is to never take advice from a website that claimed to be an expert on being a "man".
- jameskachan, on 02/20/2008, -0/+3"Use proper grammar and vocab that reflects a higher education."
Another tip must be to short form things in conversation, especially when speaking about proper English. - qwertycopter, on 02/20/2008, -0/+3In other news: Something Else That's Completely Obvious
- RealmDown, on 02/20/2008, -3/+5Monsieur Scaramanga, a pleasure. I thought you were dead?
- Hoogie7Dowser, on 02/20/2008, -4/+6You're a ***** tool. These tips are worthless. Good handshake, dress well, etc...
If anyone doesn't know these tips already, they need to lick my *****. - renagadex2, on 02/20/2008, -1/+3Rusty trombone
- Stupidumb, on 02/21/2008, -0/+2You say "frigging" instead of "*****" in an effort, I suppose, to not offend anyone. The you encourage suicide. Mixed signals...mixed signals...
- bluehouse, on 02/20/2008, -0/+2I like to walk into a room, drop trow, and do the helicopter. That usually makes a lasting impression
- Peko, on 02/20/2008, -0/+2I actually like to pose with a bookcase of scholarly looking leather bound books behind me, as I assume the thoughtful chin-resting-on-fist pose. I also wear glasses, even though I don't need them.
- musicmanryan, on 02/20/2008, -0/+2All the information is obvious if you have a high school education or more.
- ApolloXLII, on 02/21/2008, -0/+2wow, i learned nothing! this is stuff i learned in high school... "communications" class. even then, most of it was common sense.
- Stupidumb, on 02/21/2008, -1/+3In the middle being asked a questiob, yell out "GET THE ***** OFF MY DONKEY, YOU FLOWER!". Then, as the interviewer turns away in disgust, soil yourself whilst licking their left earlobe.
- topgigmedia, on 02/20/2008, -0/+2rip on and then ask, "hey are we near a Denny's? - cause somethin' smells kinda good."
- xpuser, on 02/20/2008, -0/+1i did all these things without even realizing it before....they are very intuitive and they work.
- raskali, on 02/20/2008, -0/+1This article could just as easily be describing a psychopath.
- stretch611, on 02/21/2008, -0/+1I'm 6'11". For some reason I am remembered.
- sockpuppets, on 02/20/2008, -2/+3... and that's why they call me snaggletooth around the office.
- Peko, on 02/20/2008, -0/+1LEROY JENKINS!
- gooovil, on 02/20/2008, -0/+1This is partially why it is so hard to separate those who are work-smart (those who do the work) and those who are persons-smart (those who also do the work but on other people)...
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