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Weirdest search engine EVER!

chacha.com — This site is just too funny. Try the guided search. "By searching with a Guide your query is sent to a real person who is skilled at finding information on the internet and knowledgable on the subject at hand so that you get the few exact results you want, not the millions of results you don't."

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  • sweetskye82, on 10/12/2007, -42/+17Definitely a cool idea!
    • patrickbwells, on 10/12/2007, -4/+52I just queried it with this question: "What is the "digg effect?".... Apparently no one would take the question...lol!
    • EternalDarkWing, on 10/12/2007, -6/+164The guide I had last night did a good job at helping me find out how to get a lot of blood out of my carpet.
    • revmonkey, on 10/12/2007, -2/+112at it's very core, it's pretty much just you getting people to search google for you.
    • Llanowar, on 10/12/2007, -6/+32Cool, but imagine them getting a few million queries a day....
    • WarpFox, on 10/12/2007, -53/+9I JUST POSTED THIS TO 4CHAN
    • DCJoeDog, on 10/12/2007, -35/+3LMAO, 4chan, you are evil, atleast not4chan isn't around anymore then it would have been truely evil at a whole new level
    • CaffeineAddict, on 10/12/2007, -30/+24chan?!?! LoL, too bad there isn't a webcam that shows the sweat shop children as there slave masters make them search for random *****
    • ImTheDarkcyde, on 10/12/2007, -2/+13too bad you're both idiots and people have been posting chacha logs to /b/ for just about as long as chacha's been around
    • neoform, on 10/12/2007, -17/+1Yeah, this search engine is BS.

      This just looks like Google's new affiliate program being put to use on a domain. All the results are identical to a Google search. Now "chacha" gets to slap some ads on there and make some money.
    • MAJORstrasser, on 10/12/2007, -3/+22You know, this kind of reminds me of the online dating game Sony used to have.

      http://duggmirror.com/playable_web_games/Sony_Online_Dating_Game_Gone_Horribly_Wrong/


      Everyone is going to pound this site, trying to get the guides to say something obscene. I love it...
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -7/+4Dugmirror anyone? :P
    • coresnake, on 10/12/2007, -4/+7you can fit dead hookers in the trunk FTW!!!
    • trylleklovn, on 10/12/2007, -1/+14"I just queried it with this question: "What is the "digg effect?".... Apparently no one would take the question...lol!"

      I chatted with a guide, which gave me this link: http://blogs.tech-recipes.com/davak/2005/11/06/digg-effect-the-top-10-things-webmasters-should-know/

      They were friendly, and asked if it was what i needed.. I hardly think anyone will really use this service, since the only way you will learn about it, is if you already know how to use google... Also i find it hard to believe that a human will understand your description better than if you just typed it into google, after all, it is just another link who might misunderstand you.
    • BitSlash, on 10/12/2007, -5/+6yeah, /b/ has been raiding them forever now.
    • Desolite, on 10/12/2007, -1/+22This is the BEST tool for a lazy person (such as I).

      I'm never going to be bother to do my own queries again... infact this allows for even more multitasking - not that i multitask, because i'm lazy.
    • evanfrey, on 10/12/2007, -1/+16I searched for digg effect as well and no guide took the search (did this multiple times). I then searched for "monkey ketchup" and found a guide almost instantly. Weird.
    • dclowd9901, on 10/12/2007, -0/+18"I hardly think anyone will really use this service, since the only way you will learn about it, is if you already know how to use google..."

      Are you kidding me? I'm going to give this website to my grandmother, parents and sister immediately! No more calls in the middle of work asking if I can find something online for them. This website is a god-send for over-tasked geeks everywhere!
    • diggger, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10I wonder if Mrs. Fields designed ChaCha's logo for them?
      http://www.studentunion.ucf.edu/images/logo_mrsfields.gif
      http://www.chacha.com/images/logo.gif
    • JuliusCaeser, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: AmandaG
      AmandaG: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: hello
      AmandaG: Hi how are you?
      AmandaG: What can I help you find regarding Google?
      You: i am doing fine, how about yourself?
      AmandaG: I'm good.
      You: i am looking for the google blog
      AmandaG: Let me see what I can find for you.
      You: o.k.
      You: are you searching for it on google?
      AmandaG: How's that?
      You: Thats what i was looking for thank you.
      AmandaG: No, it was already on the database.
      AmandaG: Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
      You: No thats it thank you
      AmandaG: Thanks for using ChaCha! I hope you had a great search experience!
      AmandaG: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
      Status: Session ended.
    • presto, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: CatherineC
      CatherineC: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: hello
      CatherineC: Hi What can I find for you?
      You: are you a bot? Is this for real?
      CatherineC: You're right I'm a bot
      CatherineC: Thank you for using ChaCha!
      Status: Session ended.
    • Sell, on 10/12/2007, -0/+11
      Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: RebeccaD
      RebeccaD: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: Hi RebeccaD
      RebeccaD: hello
      You: My name is Genghis
      You: and I need help
      RebeccaD: what can I find for you?
      You: I need info on Lothar of the Hill People
      You: I have a report to do
      RebeccaD: okay, one moment please.
      You: ok
      You: no no no. I mean the REAL Lothar of the Hill People
      RebeccaD: okay.....
      You: He was the Nomadic leader of the HIll People for 2 centuries
      You: people lived a long time back then
      RebeccaD: okay
      You: apparently
      You: My teacher says that it was Lothar that invented standing in line
      You: just after he turned cats and dogs against each other.
      You: Before Lothar people would just stand around and nothing got done
      RebeccaD: I can not seem to find anything on that for you.
      RebeccaD: Thanks for using ChaCha! I hope you had a great search experience!
      RebeccaD: Thank you for using ChaCha!
      Status: Session ended.
    • shinynew, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2I wanted to see if they knew what /b/ was. here is the log:
      Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: SandraD
      SandraD: Welcome to ChaCha!
      SandraD: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
      You: hi
      You: do you have any idea what /b/ is?
      SandraD: Hello , how are you tonight?
      You: fine
      SandraD: a letter
      SandraD: Thank you for using ChaCha!
      Status: Session ended.
      Then I asked the all powerfull all knowing google and got this: See results for: 4chan
      google FTW!
    • anthonyyeung, on 10/12/2007, -1/+16DonnaR: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: hi
      You: are you for real?
      You: or is this a computer
      DonnaR: Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
      You: well this sure is friendly
      DonnaR: I am real.
      You: wow
      You: really?
      You: i'm sorry
      You: i thought
      DonnaR: Yes. Really.
      You: you know
      You: i thought
      You: oh gee
      You: i feel like an idiot now
      You: will you forgive me?
      DonnaR: Please don't.
      DonnaR: Of course.
      You: thank you so much
      You: i mean things have been so tough for me these past few weeks
      DonnaR: I'm sorry to hear that.
      You: my cat died from eating bowl noodles in fridge
      You: she was only a small kitten
      You: it pains me just thinking about it
      You: i mean
      You: all i wanted to do was to feed her
      You: but
      You: i just
      You: i just killed her..
      You: i feel horrible
      DonnaR: That is brutal.
      You: I'm so pained by this.
      You: Every night I get insomnia
      DonnaR: I'm sre.
      DonnaR: sure*
      You: you..
      You: don't believe me?
      You: sigh
      You: no one in this world believes me
      You: not my mom
      You: not my dad
      You: not my kitten
      You: i feel so alone
      You: in this world
      You: do you know of any tall places?
      DonnaR: Thank you for using ChaCha!
      You: i feel so rotten..
      Status: Session ended.
    • jonquille, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1funny how they say it will give you better results than what google gives [you], when its just "guide" googlin' it for you... or not at all and passing you to another guide that 'may help'.. i tried it cus i thought it was innovative...
  • escapegoat, on 10/12/2007, -6/+56Cool idea, but I can't seem to get a guide while searching for "hardcore animal porn." WTF?
    • PirateFSM, on 10/12/2007, -2/+188Try now, I just started my shift.
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -9/+40They don't seem to have anything on "paraplegic midgets frollicking in meadows with buttplugs in their ears" either.

      Meh, I'm sticking with Google.
    • Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -16/+2foobar: Ever hear of Occam's razor?
    • billlyboobs34, on 10/12/2007, -18/+4And I thought I was having trouble looking up child porn ...studies...illustrated studies.

      /SNL reference
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -10/+108Actual chat log for above query:

      _______________________________
      Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: MarcieG
      MarcieG: Welcome to ChaCha!
      MarcieG: Hi how are you?
      MarcieG: Waht may I find you today?
      You: do you have any paraplegic midgets frollicking in meadows with buttplugs in their ears ?
      MarcieG: Thank you for using ChaCha!
      Status: Session ended.
      _______________________________

      Booooring!
    • Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -4/+65Wait, how the hell does a paraplegic frolic anyway?
    • billlyboobs34, on 10/12/2007, -3/+40On strings and harnesses of course...
    • Nougat, on 10/12/2007, -4/+15Quick, every search for lemonparty!
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -3/+26I'm really getting a kick out of this!


      Query: There's Chacha, but where's the hoohoo dilly?

      Chat log:
      _____________________________
      Status: Connected to guide: MicheleW
      MicheleW: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: Hello, my name's Dill Doe.
      MicheleW: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
      MicheleW: uh huh.
      You: I'm looking for the matching hoohoo dilly for ChaCha. Can you help me here?
      MicheleW: What is a hoohoo dilly?
      You: a hoohoo dilly is the matching counterpart to a chacha.
      You: you know kindof like a plug and a socket.
      MicheleW: I see. I think you searching the wrong site.
      MicheleW: Thank you for using ChaCha!
      Status: Session ended.
      _____________________________
    • majoogybobber, on 10/12/2007, -4/+46Norman: Welcome to ChaCha
      You: Hi
      Norman: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
      You: I'd like to get some information about puppies
      Norman: Breeding or training info
      You: In particular, I'd like to know which breeds handle the stress of human/canine intercourse the best

      My connection was ended for "abusive behavior".
    • akira117, on 10/12/2007, -3/+15Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: AudreyP
      AudreyP: Welcome to ChaCha!
      AudreyP: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
      You: Cool
      AudreyP: ChaCha is the search engine used for your searches...
      You: Great
      AudreyP: Would you like any other info?
      You: Can I have a link to show that info
      AudreyP: Have a great day, and please visit us again soon!
      You: link
      AudreyP: There's no link to show you...
      You: so how to you get the info?
      AudreyP: Do you have any other questions?
      You: the one I just asked you
      AudreyP: We search our vast database of info...
      You: how is that done?
      AudreyP: It's built by ChaCha
      You: (google)
      AudreyP: I'm sorry...I'm not a tech.
      You: just admit it....
      You: Thanks, I'm done.
      Status: Session ended.
    • spacebar14, on 10/12/2007, -2/+123Query: how can i conceal a murder weapon

      Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: BryanT
      BryanT: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: Can you help?
      BryanT: and why would you need this info?
      You: because i need to conceal a murder weapon?
      BryanT: what type weapon?
      You: specifically ... a m41a pulse rifle
      BryanT: kinda big isn't that?
      BryanT: as well as overkill
      You: yes, but i still need to hide it.
      BryanT: just do what ripley did
      BryanT: throw it into a chello case
      You: LMFAO
      You: BryanT you just made my day. LOL you're getting on Digg too :D
      BryanT: thanks
      You: Thanks, I'm done.
      Status: Session ended.
    • blinkfink182, on 10/12/2007, -1/+7@spacebar:

      I nearly crapped by pants with that one. Huzzah!
    • Universal, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: AprilM
      AprilM: Welcome to ChaCha!
      AprilM: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
      You: the answer to everything
      AprilM: How are you this afternoon?
      You: looking for the answer to everything
      AprilM: sounds like a pretty extensive search
      You: Is there such a place where I can find the answer to everything?
      You: This could take a while?
      [10 minutes later]
      AprilM: :) The web of course@!
      ...
      Status: Session ended.
    • spacebar14, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1The best part about mine was I thought I was the only one who knew precisely where the m41a pulse rifle came from haha.
    • blaileigh, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Oh how I love Cha Cha. I used it today and received great information on my search. My search for on locating some toys for my nephews for Christmas. The guide gave me some great sites and I was able to receive FREE SHIPPING!
  • Tamriel, on 10/12/2007, -6/+119Digg is totally going to destroy this site. Is it bad that I think that's hilarious?
    • wtfunkymonkey, on 10/12/2007, -6/+37It's about as wrong as it was for me to laugh when I read this, because I was thinking the same thing.
      Oh, and searching for "having dirty sex with search engine guides" doesn't seem to get any takers. What the hell?
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -3/+58Unless the "guides" are actually FBI agents and this whole ChaCha thing is a sting. All the child-porn-queries aren't going to be that funny anymore all of a sudden.
    • MAJORstrasser, on 10/12/2007, -1/+37LisaL: Sorry, my whole system just froze. Been doing this a lot recently. If you're there, I'm going to have to transfer you to someone else. Sorry. Thanks for using ChaCha!

      Ahahaha...this thing's going to hell.
    • joeljkp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@foobar:

      It's not, I'm a guide on there at times. Made ~$75 at it so far, too.
  • patrickbwells, on 10/12/2007, -2/+36I just applied for a job at chacha.com
    • ojk007, on 10/12/2007, -30/+2yeah me thinky they bots
    • crash331, on 10/12/2007, -0/+24Don't think they are bots. I just asked a question that I knew the answers to, and the guide did pretty good and even asked me a question during the process to clarify. Only gave me 4 results and took about 7 minutes, so I guess that is the downside.
    • revmonkey, on 10/12/2007, -2/+26they are actual people, not bots.
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -9/+6Too bad I'm not elligible to work in the States. I'd love to be a guide. I'd send all requests to filthy porn sites and goatse.
  • cds0528, on 10/12/2007, -0/+55There's no way this would work if people actually found out about this site...
    • wtfunkymonkey, on 10/12/2007, -2/+14How many millions of searches does google perform in a day?
    • tutivlahos, on 10/12/2007, -3/+47try billions...
    • MAJORstrasser, on 10/12/2007, -0/+32I only found US stats, but for the month of October Google had 3.022 billion queries...or roughly 100 million a day.
  • piedood, on 10/12/2007, -17/+20I call shenanigans
    • MAJORstrasser, on 10/12/2007, -5/+27WTF is up with people and saying shenanigans? This isn't elementary school, damnit. It's *****...not shenanigans. To quote Super Troopers, "I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says 'Shenanigans.'"
    • TheGilmanator, on 10/12/2007, -1/+23Hey, what's the name of that resturaunt you like with all the stuff on the walls?
    • kb9vgr, on 10/12/2007, -3/+24shenanigans ?
    • billlyboobs34, on 10/12/2007, -24/+6"If anyone says shenanigans one more time, I'm gonna pistol whip them!"
  • umrgregg, on 10/12/2007, -3/+32My guide is having a field day with my question:

    "How do I remove blood stains from the trunk of my car?"

    It appears they do have a sense of humor ;)
  • shranko, on 10/12/2007, -2/+20So basically there is some one on the other end searching Google for you. Yeah this will tank.
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -0/+35But in a fun and entertaining way!
  • razialx, on 10/12/2007, -3/+25http://www.somethingawful.com/index.php?a=4291
    They did an article on this. The site is, sadly, real.
  • mjhiggins256, on 10/12/2007, -22/+1Love the founder's pose in a red wife beater http://www.scottajones.com/
  • JeremyTTU, on 10/12/2007, -50/+1The site has "Sponsored Links"... come on people... its nice and all, but you are pretty much making these people $$$ by clicking on the links...

    This is totally lame in my book.... Think about it this way...

    They take yer search query... use the Google API to get results... use AdSense to get content ads... intersperse them into the content...

    They make $$$... lame... I repeat... lame
    • alwaysru, on 10/12/2007, -1/+53Oh my god, a company out there to make MONEY?!? THE SHAME.
    • skitzovision, on 10/12/2007, -0/+15I bet you wish that you would have thought of it. Don't be a hater! you should support your fellow man and his clever money making ideas. Who Knows? The next stupid idea could be yours.
    • Desolite, on 10/12/2007, -0/+17and why is it horrible if someone makes money via entertaining me?

      maybe we should stop seeing movies... or listening to music? or reading books. or playing computer games!

      stop being such a buzz kill.
    • davesphone00, on 10/12/2007, -0/+16So anyone that makes $$$ is lame. I hope you become the most un-lame person there ever was.
    • foobar5892, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Have fun being a pennyless bum!
    • Nougat, on 10/12/2007, -3/+5@Desolite:

      No way man, we should still have all those things, but for free, and without any advertising at all. Anarchy is freedom, man! ... Hey, can I crash on your couch for a few days? I'll clean up after myself and everything.

      [/hippie]
  • techpimp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+13I searched "raves" and the second result was Walmart...
  • agent888, on 10/12/2007, -0/+23I could turn my mom onto this site, so she could finally use some of them internets~ Then again the people would probably hunt me down and murder me after they got some of her searches. I could just see her search entry now: "Pewter Candle Sticks on ebay dot com"
    • aposter, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3It wouldn't be murder. It would be justifiable homicide. ;)
  • Bradl3y, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Haha , my guide linked me to a google books search for my query.

    At first I thought it was a bot, but then he misspelled "serch" and actually linked me to a better article once I clarified I wasn't looking for a book on my subject.
  • mjhiggins256, on 10/12/2007, -23/+2Love the founders pose in a red muscle shirt http://www.scottajones.com/
    • Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -0/+21Second time's the charm, huh?
    • davesphone00, on 10/12/2007, -17/+10I hope he's got a permit for those guns.
    • rolfeman02, on 10/12/2007, -0/+18It didn't work the first time...for either of you
  • DrSkrud, on 10/12/2007, -2/+18Uhm ... Where does it say that ChaCha is a cooking site? :P

    You: Yeah, I'm looking for resources on programming for PIC18 Microcontrollers with C or Basic.
    lindam: Pardon me this is a cooking site
    • 13B1303, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3hi-tech software, picc lite is a free C compiler that works with mplab ide.
  • Aliarse, on 10/12/2007, -3/+20"Live Guide Now is disabled because you have been involved in a possible abusive action. Our abuse alert is set at a low threshold to protect our visitors and guides.

    If you feel that you have received this message in error, please e-mail us at abuse_resolution@chacha.com with a request for re-entry to our site.

    We appreciate your feedback. Thank you.

    Your location is: **.***.***.**"

    Lol? I guess they dont like people searching for "ChaCha sucks?"
  • TroubleInMind, on 10/12/2007, -0/+14Google for Grammas
    • lordsandwich, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Yep, and I could actually see them making this work as a paid subscription for seniors. Pretty sure my grandma doesn't even know what a search engine is...
  • Dolomite, on 10/12/2007, -20/+2haha i told that bitch to hurry up and she hung up on me. what a waste... i could just go to google and get the answers myself.
    • SimplyZ, on 10/12/2007, -0/+15right on dolomite...you teach that search guide whos boss!
    • ilovefrenzal, on 10/12/2007, -14/+0rick james... bitch
  • ZeroMP, on 10/12/2007, -6/+25Status: Connected to guide: LucilleE
    LucilleE: Welcome to ChaCha!
    You: Hello
    LucilleE: What may i help you find regarding this site is hilarious?
    You: I just think this site is really odd.
    You: Not in a bad way though
    You: but it is about to get pounded by digg users hard.
    Status: Session ended.
    • theorymaster, on 10/12/2007, -3/+8I was searching for a laptop bag and the guides helped me out with the right recommendations, something you can't do on google.

  • eishak, on 10/12/2007, -3/+6No matter what I'm searching for (just did a vanity search), I find it very uncomfortable for a real human being to know what I'm searching for.
    • theorymaster, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7The site came up in September. The guides get around $20 per hour for this service. And each guide has a certain area of specilization.
    • joeljkp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1@theorymaster:

      No, guides get ~$5 per hour of solid searching time (not real time). Sometimes I've seen it go as low as ~$3. If you're one of the top 20% of the guides, though, you can get $10/searching hour.

      You can make a lot more by referring people, then collecting 10% of their earnings.
  • imafish2002, on 10/12/2007, -1/+16Ok what question shall we all ask as a digg collective? Pictures with Shoes on heads again or is that done with? :P
  • TroubleInMind, on 10/12/2007, -2/+14This thread delivers
  • Klarth, on 10/12/2007, -0/+14Got a session going on this question:

    "Is it possible to fake Munchausen's syndrome for attention?"

    This should be good...
  • UltimaNut, on 10/12/2007, -2/+30I searched for turtle porn with a guide. Oddly enough Tina found some for me.
  • tical2756, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7I searched for pizza and got 2 ESPN sites, a link to the ACLU and the history of pizza on wikipedia. I think I'll stick with google.
  • tlimon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4This would be a good place to start for our aging parents who are baffled by Google's 121,000 results. Its a nice way to ease into searching for somebody who just discovered "the internet" Thumbs Up!
    • MrUnderbridge, on 10/12/2007, -0/+22Right, but tell your grandparents that it's still a computer on the other end. They'll be really impressed. Also tell them that it's the computer's job to convince you it's a real person, and not to put up with that sort of thing.

      Oh, and tell them to call the guide "Alan" regardless of what it tells you its name is.
  • vibez, on 10/12/2007, -3/+40"How do I remove blood stains from the trunk of my car?"

    Status: Looking for a guide ...
    Status: Connected to guide: Melinda M
    Melinda M: Welcome to ChaCha!
    Melinda M: Bleach is very helpful for that.
    Melinda M: DNA remains I think though.
    You: how about semen stains?
    Melinda M: Thank you for using ChaCha!
    Status: Session ended.
    • billlyboobs34, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1410%+ bleach concentrations will destroy DNA... ;-)
    • MrUnderbridge, on 10/12/2007, -1/+8"10%+ bleach concentrations will destroy DNA... ;-)"

      The problem is getting the bleach in all the little crevices. Blood likes to seep in all kinds of places, you know. Especially if the body starts to putrify in the trunk while you drive. It took me forever to get those stains out.

      Make sure when you're done with the car you don't sell it, take it to Monster Joe's Truck and Tow. You don't want to be leaving that kind of evidence around.
    • billlyboobs34, on 10/12/2007, -1/+8I'd recommend thinking ahead and lining your trunk with garbage bags... in the very least keep a box of garbage bags with you at all times.
      The first step would be to wash with hot water and maybe some dish washing detergent this will help break up cell and nuclear membranes to release the DNA.

      After this is where the bleach comes in. It's almost easier if you spray it in a gardening pesticide pump type sprayer. Spray it on and really soak the inside of the trunk. You may have to move the carpeting around or take it out. I'm not really sure how well color safe bleach works but you job is to destroy evidence not keep your car's trunk looking new.

      You can finish up with a strong UV lamp, but keep it away from your skin and don't look at it without eye protection. You can just hang it and leave it for a while.
  • 10poundbrown, on 10/12/2007, -8/+21EVER!!

    Anyone else sick of "EVER!!" posts on Digg?

    Gayest post EVER!!
  • geoken, on 10/12/2007, -0/+30Question:

    "who do our bases belong to?"
  • RupertBear, on 10/12/2007, -9/+2This is the guy that did Gracenote which was cool, so's this only 'cos its so stupid tho. I was displeased with the response time it took my guide to find out how to drown kittens, relatively straightforward process.
  • willis77, on 10/12/2007, -12/+3AngelaB: Welcome to ChaCha!
    AngelaB: Good Morning
    AngelaB: anything specific on terriers you would like me to find for you?
    You: average weight
    AngelaB: Welcome to ChaCha! Please wait a moment while I search for your results.
    AngelaB: Are these results sufficient?
    You: there are no results displayed
    AngelaB: that sounds strange ...there should be 3 different results right next to the chat box?
    AngelaB: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
    You: nope, blank
  • wtfunkymonkey, on 10/12/2007, -9/+4I just gave some poor girl the hardest time while making her look for a tea cozy.
    • wtfunkymonkey, on 10/12/2007, -5/+10MalonieH: Welcome to ChaCha!
      MalonieH: Hi there. I will be helping with your search.
      You: I'm looking for tea cozies!
      MalonieH: cool,let me see what I can find you.
      MalonieH: we have a small time delay so please be patient. :-)
      You: that's okay deary, I'm not in too much of a hurry. I just want to make sure I get some in time for christmas
      MalonieH: I just have one more place to look...
      MalonieH: are those results sufficiant? or would you like more?
      You: You call those tea cozies? Well, we had better tea cozies made from potato sacks during the depression!
      You: My goodness, I've never seen such shoddy craftsmanship in my life.
      MalonieH: thank you for choosing chacha for your search needs. have a great day. :-)
      MalonieH: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
      Status: Session ended.
  • Futurama56, on 10/12/2007, -3/+3I am trying to bring my guide down with a euro question...

    what is the fastest way from 12 rue de braque, paris, france to 31 avenue bosquet, paris, france by foot

    However, it loaded businessweek in a flash window during my chat session, so basically I am equally distracted for her lack of speed...its been >5 min still no answer.
    • ZeroG52, on 10/12/2007, -0/+8Per your question, I tried it myself:

      Status: Looking for a guide ...
      Status: Connected to guide: CrystalE
      CrystalE: Welcome to ChaCha!
      You: Hi!
      CrystalE: Hello, how are you today?
      You: Good! Need backpacking directions...
      CrystalE: Ok give me a moment and will get that for you.
      You: Ok, thanks!
      CrystalE: I appreciate your patience while I find exactly what you need.
      You: No problem at all.
      CrystalE: Ok that site I sent said it was like mapquest but I don't think it is I can't put in the second address?
      You: Hmmm....
      You: Maybe it's rue bosquet...
      CrystalE: There is a route finder on the second site but when I click on it it opens a new window
      You: I'm so lost!
      CrystalE: No I think it is right I looked it up on the first site...
      CrystalE: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
      Status: Session ended.

      She actually found it for me!
  • venuspcs, on 10/12/2007, -4/+14I asked: "Where can I find a french woman to suck my ***** for free?"

    And I got the following error message:

    "Live Guide Now is disabled because you have been involved in a possible abusive action. Our abuse alert is set at a low threshold to protect our visitors and guides.

    If you feel that you have received this message in error, please e-mail us at abuse_resolution@chacha.com with a request for re-entry to our site.

    We appreciate your feedback. Thank you.

    Your location is: 83.205.198.175"
    • wtfunkymonkey, on 10/12/2007, -5/+48good job posting your IP address there, slick.
    • Tricycles, on 10/12/2007, -4/+11thanks for your IP
    • techpimp, on 10/12/2007, -4/+24AMarseille-251-1-80-175.w83-205.abo.wanadoo.fr

      ______________________
      don't post your ip address.|
      ˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉˉ
    • billlyboobs34, on 10/12/2007, -1/+14Who cares what his IP is... btw I got that he was french when he wanted a french woman...
    • tony134340, on 10/12/2007, -3/+3I think you're about to get pounded.
    • dbug, on 10/12/2007, -3/+23Wow, you got his IP!!!!!!!
      And what are you gonna do with it now? Idiots.

      You realize that everytime you're on IRC everyone can actually see your IP (on most servers anyway)? Big fking deal.
    • Nougat, on 10/12/2007, -4/+2Should have asked where to find a French woman to suck your ***** for *a fee.*
    • Dolomite, on 10/12/2007, -8/+1HAHA... I have your IP now! Thanks.
    • barthosch, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10Your location is: 127.0.0.1
    • Xilon, on 10/12/2007, -5/+3It's much easier to hack someone knowing their IP already. Also you can report an abusive IP to their ISP.
    • thealliedhacker, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Port 21 open >:)

      The server isn't ftp though.
  • graiz, on 10/12/2007, -0/+38Status: Looking for a guide ...
    Status: Connected to guide: ValerieH
    ValerieH: Welcome to ChaCha!
    ValerieH: Hello how are you?
    You: Good and you?
    ValerieH: I am doing great!
    ValerieH: Thank you for asking.
    You: How does this work? Do you research every request?
    ValerieH: Yes we do
    ValerieH: What can I help you with.
    You: Do you work for Cha Cha or are you an independent agent?
    ValerieH: Working for Chacha is an independent agent
    You: Do you get paid by volume of answers or per hour? How does one become an agent?
    ValerieH: Let me get you some information on this topic.
    ValerieH: Currently they are hiring per invite from other members
    ValerieH: They should be putting out invites some time this month.
    You: How did you become an agent?
    ValerieH: I was referred from another guide
    You: Do you get paid per answer or per hour or otherwise?
    ValerieH: Well there are several different ways
    ValerieH: it is not "per hour"
    ValerieH: and your pay per search depends on you level of expertise
    ValerieH: in the training mode you will not get paid until you have done 10-15 successful searches
    You: Thanks... You've been helpful!
    ValerieH: Sure thing!
    ValerieH: Have a great one!
    • hawarkarem, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3awesome...but how much?

      it's a shame I'm in the UK, i got some spare time. it would be cool to answer all the random/weird questions and get paid for it. if every student did this (depending on how the pay is) for a few hours a week...it could really help them through college. maybe pay for groceries or their Internet bill.
    • lostandfound, on 10/12/2007, -3/+14They make $5/hour for a *search hour* not for just being logged on...
      The searches are limited to 10 minutes of paid time - roughly $0.83 cents...
      They accept each search with the honest intention of helping... they try to remain courteous and professional - even when they're being ridiculed, teased, pranked, or whatever... Because most of them really, really need the $$.
      They're not even making minimum wage...
      And this is funny to some people...
      If you're going to waste their time and resources searching for stupid prank stuff, at least stick around and rate them 'Great' so they have a chance of promoting up to a higher pay level.
    • joeljkp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3@lostandfound:

      Oh, lighten up. I'm a guide at times too, but I'm not dense enough to think I could make a living off of it. I did it for a week or so in my spare time and made a good $75 spending money. Sure beats having to go out and find a real job, if you can stand it.
  • Pimpalicious316, on 10/12/2007, -5/+5heh, RebeccaD just helped me with my erectile disfunction

    bwahahahaaaaa
    • imafish2002, on 10/12/2007, -0/+42ironic being called pimpalicious and having erectile dysfunction no?
  • capiCrimm, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1Isn't this what Google Answers and web forums are for?
  • rand21althor, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2I remember Leo Laporte mentioning this site on the latest TWiT netcast, and how it was the same idea as with Google Answers.
  • AceTracer, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5So it's Google Answers for free.

    About.com also did this once upon a time during the dot com days. Megan Morrone used to be a guide there.
  • 52tease, on 10/12/2007, -3/+41In case you don't get it, this is exactly what happens when you talk to a reference librarian. There are two main differences here, though. The first good and the second a real pitfall:
    1. Unlike the reference interview, you don't have to go into the library. Also, this doesn't in any way associate itself with libraries, so it automagically removes a hurdle that keeps many people from entering that 'academic institution'.

    2. The only qualifications for guides appear to be:
    I am over the age of 18
    I am legally authorized to work in the United States
    I can spell correctly, use correct grammar, and am fluent in English
    I like working with people and have a polite and courteous approach with people
    I have high speed Internet (e.g. dsl, cable)
    I have 30MB+ of storage available on my computer
    I can navigate the Internet with ease

    This means that you are not getting help from a trained professional, but from a self-professed 'established Internet navigator' who speaks English (and can afford high speed Internet). Who knows if they are able to effectively evaluate relevance and reliability (recent studies have shown - http://www.eschoolnews.com/news/showStoryts.cfm?ArticleID=6725&page=1 - that those who think they are IT/IR savvy are really not)?

    It is an awesome idea, but one we must accept with a grain of salt. A much better (and more reliable AND less commercial resource) is the Library of Congress' Ask a Librarian page: http://www.loc.gov/rr/askalib/

    Quick side note, this seems appropriate as well: http://m-w.com/dictionary/cybrarian
    • 52tease, on 10/12/2007, -12/+6Are you kidding me? Why would someone digg this comment down? Too much valid information for you? Sorry for being informative and not posting my "I tried to kill a whore" conversation with someone who's just trying to make a buck.

      Fidiot!
    • joeljkp, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Yeah, the guides all select keywords that they "have experience in", though they can accept any searches that come through, if they want. The keywords are self-selected, but they don't get paid for them until they've answered a few training queries first.
  • BassJunkie, on 10/12/2007, -0/+17This just isn't acceptable! Never before in my years of googling have i been told there's no-one available to take my search!!! All I asked was "What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?" only to be told all the guides are busy with other people!!!!

    Guess I'll have to try with an even more devious question later!
  • Gazpacho, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5Am I the only one "weired out" by this service? Maybe I've grown accustom to Googling random words and sets of words until I find my answer, but having someone do it for me... weird.
    • dmax801, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4That "human contact" thing gets a bit overwhelming, eh?

      Gotta get out of the basement a little more often, I would think.
  • johngalt929, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2This sounds like something that uses Amazon's Mechanical Turk Service

    http://www.mturk.com/mturk/welcome

    Get paid a penny or a dime to do something humans are better at than computers.

    Also, many libraries already have an online service like this, 24hour librarian who will help you with reference queries.
  • guttertrash, on 10/12/2007, -20/+3this is a good idea. most internet users (americans) are too stupid to use a search engine properly so this is awsome.
    • Jwoey, on 10/12/2007, -3/+5god you're an ignorant *****.
    • Xilon, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2The funny thing is, he's probably right... and most likely not just Americans.

      Quite possibly they would be smart enough to use a smart engine, but not use it efficiently, at least not as efficiently as the guides on ChaCha.
  • raabco, on 10/12/2007, -2/+33Original search: discipline a German turkey for improper urination

    Status: Looking for a guide ...
    Status: Connected to guide: Jennifer R
    Jennifer R: Welcome to ChaCha!
    Jennifer R: Could you clarify your search question?
    You: possibly
    Jennifer R: That will hust help with my search!
    Jennifer R: just
    You: my christmas turkey from germany keeps urinating in the house, no matter what we do
    You: im trying to keep the house clean until we can kill it
    Jennifer R: I will find some info on turkeys
    You: i understand much about turkeys, it's more about the urination all over the wall that im concerned about
    Jennifer R: Would you like to know what to use to clean it up?
    You: i don't want to spend the next 2 weeks cleaning it up, I'd prefer to know how to train it not to pee all over
    You: hitting it doesn't seem to help
    Jennifer R: Yeah I don't think you can train a turkey, but you never know!
    You: heh i suppose! training isn't so important, seeing as it'll be a moot point in 2 weeks... is there some sore of clamp or amature surgery i could use?
    Jennifer R: We could find a veterinarian
    You: I was hoping for a cheap fix.
    (minutes pass)
    Jennifer R: I am unable to help you soryy! I will transfer you to someone else!
    Transfer: You are being transfered to another guide who can help you search even better!
    Looking for guide ...
  • Pimpalicious316, on 10/12/2007, -5/+18to hell with AmyD

    i tried to introduce myself and got banned

    my name is Mr. Baulls. Harry Baulls.

    lamers.
  • safetyseal, on 10/12/2007, -2/+22AngelaB: Good Morning
    AngelaB: Welcome to ChaCha! Please wait a moment while I search for your results.
    You: ok..good morning to you as well
    You: so you are real people in there right?
    AngelaB: yes we are
    You: AMAZING!
    You: this literally blows my mind
    You: awesome with your help those pesky blod stains will be a thing of the past
    AngelaB: i hope so:)
    You: indeed
    You: thai hookers aren't built like the used to be
    AngelaB: how are these results so far?
    You: they just can't take punch anymore..yeah it looks fine I think I'm gonna have these stians out in no time
    You: thanks a ton, no do you know where i can rent a wood chipper?
    AngelaB: Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
    AngelaB: would you like for me to search for you?
    You: yeah I'd like to find place where I could rent a wood chipper in the Dallas fort worth area
    AngelaB: sure
    AngelaB: one moment please
    AngelaB: Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I'm finding the most relevant results for your search.
    You: thanks so much, your worth a million right now
    AngelaB: thats a tough one ..its hard to get past all the car rentals
    You: hmm well thats ok i guess i can use the yellow pages
    AngelaB: i will just finish this search..wont be a moment
    You: k
    AngelaB: there you go ..finally found one!
    You: awesome your alife saver
    You: i guess that will be all for me, but let me give you a piece of advice never import a thai hooker they are built like china dolls...that can't handle the rigors of modern american life....thanks so much angelaB
    AngelaB: youre welcome lol
    AngelaB: have a great day!
    You: you too
    AngelaB: Thanks for searching ChaCha!
    AngelaB: Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
    • yllabianbitpipe, on 10/12/2007, -0/+12haha... I think they might have a side business unintentionally entertaining bored websurfers.
    • Xilon, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4Well it's a win-win situation. They get paid since most likely their search will be successful, and the 'bored surfer' most likely gets entertained.
  • felchdonkey, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2I tried a search that I had been unsuccessful with before on Google - looking for those heated long johns that hunters wear in the snow.

    The guide wasn't able to find anything I hadn't already found, but then again, I know what I'm doing anyway. What the guide WAS was quick, friendly, and helpful.

    I wouldn't need this myself, since I'm the one my family calls when THEY want to find something on Google - but this is definitely a link I'm giving to my family, since it will save me a LOT of time that I usually spend searching for them.
  • tonyhartfield, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1http://genmay.net/showthread.php?t=691767

    genmay ftw
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