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227 Comments
- ej1oo1, on 10/19/2009, -8/+473"Actually we don't throw out bags that tick because modern bombs don't tick. We only throw out bags that vibrate. Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor, but occasionally... *whisper* it's a dildo. In those cases we are told to use the indefinite article 'a dildo' never 'your dildo' "
For some reason that quote came up in my mind. - mrmango786, on 10/19/2009, -18/+335Bureaucracy fail.
- 12916studios, on 10/19/2009, -1/+273http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeWq6rWzChw
A controlled demo of an exploding laptop battery. Pretty freaking cool, actually. - inigomntoya, on 10/19/2009, -1/+197Narrator: Was it ticking?
Airport Security Officer: Actually throwers don't worry about ticking 'cause modern bombs don't tick.
Narrator: Sorry, throwers?
Airport Security Officer: Baggage handlers. But, when a suitcase vibrates, then the throwers gotta call the police.
Narrator: My suitcase was vibrating?
Airport Security Officer: Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor, but every once in a while...
[whispering]
Airport Security Officer: it's a dildo. Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article a dildo, never your dildo.
Narrator: I don't own... - guttersniper, on 10/19/2009, -0/+154I predict that we will see an upsurge of battery-explosion youtube videos (along with accompanying injuries) followed by, hopefully, an investigation on Mythbusters. Indirectly, this xkcd made the next year or so slightly more interesting. Woo.
- binky79, on 10/19/2009, -70/+223This is the best xkcd ever!
- whiteyak41, on 10/19/2009, -1/+147Meanwhile at Homeland Security:
"Ok guys, I guess we have to ban laptops now!" - lcg9q3, on 10/19/2009, -1/+115ha, pretty good one. In all truth, airport security is a joke. If someone wants to smuggle something aboard, they will find a way. Meanwhile, the rest of us get hassled over water bottles and taking off our shoes.
- pleen, on 10/19/2009, -3/+107We are worried about liquids instead of laptops because what happens at US airports is not about security, it is about the illusion of security. When people use laptops in a terrorist plot that makes the news, they will ban laptops if and only if they think it won't lose them too much money from business passengers.
- bluerazor413, on 10/19/2009, -8/+100You can't say bomb on an airplane!
- palehorse864, on 10/19/2009, -9/+99No, but he did save a bunch of money on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
- Tai1983, on 10/19/2009, -4/+91Way to butcher the quote.
- theCoffee, on 10/19/2009, -10/+94Fun fact: You cannot bring matches onto an Aircraft. However a lighter is fine.
- brownsound00, on 10/19/2009, -3/+77I'm just gonna put this out there... but Geico has really done well for itself advertising-wise
- inigomntoya, on 10/19/2009, -1/+69You probably saved a bunch of money by doing so...
- samurimaster, on 10/19/2009, -2/+68*Gets out the tazer*
- MrThirsty, on 10/19/2009, -5/+71You're not even trying anymore...
- inigomntoya, on 10/19/2009, -2/+68Google says this is the source: http://digg.com/comics_animation/xkcd_A_Webcomic_B ...
Uh oh...
I think I just created an infinite loop! - domdunc, on 10/19/2009, -1/+65As they say, airport security only makes sure the honest people aren't armed.
- rsmith32, on 10/19/2009, -0/+64I like it how they try to make it out to be a serious scientific experiment, while in the background, the guys shout "woohoo" every time another cell explodes.
- hardeep1singh, on 10/19/2009, -8/+70Thats the fake binky.
- juliusthecat, on 10/19/2009, -10/+72Dude - time to move on. Seriously.
- DubWainwright, on 10/19/2009, -0/+61You know, maybe we should just ban passengers.
- Dinsdale77, on 10/19/2009, -8/+68This reminds me of when I got drunk BEFORE going to the airport.
- cx0der, on 10/19/2009, -5/+64You have lost your edge man!
- EnTaroTassadar, on 10/19/2009, -5/+63No, he won't realize you have a good point. He's going to realize "Hey, this metal-detector wand would fit nicely up your ass, punk," and proceed to check for metal objects in your rectum in front of the rest of the line.
- Khirzask, on 10/19/2009, -1/+58bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb
- CabooseGT, on 10/19/2009, -1/+51A backpack would serve no good for the stick figures since they have no shoulders.
- garryfields, on 10/19/2009, -2/+52surefire way to get buried: express your concern over getting buried.
- brownsound00, on 10/19/2009, -0/+50The narrator sounds like Kevin from the office
- Khast, on 10/19/2009, -2/+50Living so close to a border, I have come to understand one basic rule, which seems fairly appropriate for baggage checks and the TSA.
DON'T SAY MORE THAN YOU HAVE TO...YOU WILL ONLY GET YOURSELF INTO DEEPER TROUBLE. Learn to shut the ***** up and just answer in short yes or no answers, unless otherwise prompted...THEN only say the bare minimums.
PS. It becomes a game after a couple years of crossing the border regularly...try to figure out what they want to hear... it will make your "screening" go by so much quicker. - mca1990, on 10/19/2009, -1/+46At least you're not brown. We have to take off more than our shoes (hint: it's our dignity).
- Stoyanov, on 10/19/2009, -2/+46Chill, it's a bong!
- Rodalli, on 10/19/2009, -8/+51Yeeeeeah...just let it go. Old meme is old.
- antdude, on 10/19/2009, -0/+42Or "Hi Jack!" like in this old Dilbert comic strip: http://www.gdargaud.net/Humor/Pics/DilbertHiJack.g ...
- yocouchdigga, on 10/19/2009, -1/+42When keeping it real goes wrong...
- cyrix, on 10/19/2009, -0/+39PILOT TO BOMBARDIER!
- zantos420, on 10/19/2009, -1/+38Actually, you can.
And I do. All the time. In fact, I put my lighter in the little bowl that gets exempted from the metal detector and always get it back.
/Just did this twice last week. - JohnILM, on 10/19/2009, -5/+40often imitated never duplicated
- deadpoetic333, on 10/19/2009, -0/+34So... Why are we worried about liquids instead of laptops like this comic pointed out? Couldn't terrorists take a few laptops aboard, tape them together and cause them to go off at a strategic location on the plane? Didn't realize what those batteries can do until watching that video.
- Aalenox, on 10/19/2009, -8/+42First xkcd in a bit that made me laugh.
- theCoffee, on 10/19/2009, -0/+31Thanks XKCD... now TSA is gonna make us check our laptops! Do you really want to trust baggage handlers with your computer?
- inactive, on 10/19/2009, -0/+29Oh God, I hope TSA never sees this.
- j0etb, on 10/19/2009, -4/+33You say that occasionally!
- Thuktun, on 10/19/2009, -1/+29You also have to be careful greeting any friends named Jack.
- inactive, on 10/19/2009, -0/+27I just removed the battery from my laptop
- vashth3stampede, on 10/19/2009, -6/+32dugg for inconsistency
- WiseBinky79, on 10/19/2009, -5/+31How can a meme be old? The concept of a meme has it's origins in Dawkins' "The Selfish Gene" Which if you have read, implies that a meme is not much different than it's biological counterpart, "the gene."
Here's illustrating the point: Human history is about 10,000 years old. ***** sapiens as we know ourselves are another several hundred thousand years old. Humans have been around for millions of years. The Earth 5 Billion years, and the universe- 13 Billion years. I don't suppose that in the course of the existence of life, that as soon as the Gene split between apes and humans occurred, after two years an ape said to the newly formed human, "You know, that chromosome 23 is really ***** old by now, dude."
So I ask, as one who takes part in this meme, but in a new, fresh, philosophical discourse that illustrates Binky79's original criticism of the authority of Diggers, but through the opposite rhetoric- one that brings the spirit of Socrates and Diogenes; the ontology of Heidegger and the phenomenology of Merleau-Ponty- would the meme be old now, or is it ready to take on new life?
Thus Spake WiseBinky79. - jdeane, on 10/19/2009, -0/+25"If this were a real life situation, the best strategy would be to move away from the laptop quickly."
He might have saved me life. - Neekolazz, on 10/19/2009, -0/+24@netdroid9,
it's from Fight Club. -
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