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See the original image at bamkapow.com —

Why Superman Will Always Suck...

bamkapow.com — Superman's always been written as an incorruptible, indestructible, indisputable force for "good" in Metropolis...very one dimensional and very boring. Here's why.

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  • Cowgodx, on 04/09/2008, -15/+68sad but true
    • SubaruPowah, on 04/09/2008, -10/+71I've always despised superman. The man who couldn't die, unless exposed to kryptonite, which is a substance supposedly found on another planet. BUT EVERYONE HAD IT!

      "Hey old lady, where did you get that kryptonite?
      " From the vending machine across the street."
      "Oh."
      • Durrok, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3Well I think it's really the only stories ever covered because unless you are going to use kryptonite you are *****. Wouldn't be much of a comic if Superman just kept dropping people off in prison in the 100s.
      • Kohaxx, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Didn't Lex once make a weapon that could take away or disable Superman's powers? I always thought that would be the way to kill him, take away his powers without him knowing and then one day he jumps off a building or stands in front of a train to save someone and dies.
        • sanman, on 04/10/2008, -3/+2If Lex was so smart, how come he couldn't figure out a cure for that baldness, instead of nursing a grudge against Superman for the rest of his life?

          Btw, if scientists ever manufacture atomic element 126, which is the postulated atomic number for kryptonite, I hope they name it Lexium, after the guy who made the most use of it.
    • zirtbow, on 04/09/2008, -0/+16Wasn't superman killed by some other guy? Doomsday I think?
      • agentlame, on 04/09/2008, -3/+16Killed, knocked unconscious for for a few months... Whatever.
        The was no real value/point to the story, save to bail DC out of bankruptcy.
    • infinityofnever, on 04/09/2008, -11/+3I completely disagree with this article... I love watching Superman because I KNOW he's invincible. I love watching all the incredible things he does without the fear of taking damage. In fact, I like superheroes who're vulnerable like Spiderman less. It is the recklessness in any character I find thrill in.
      • sephiroth965, on 04/09/2008, -4/+15That's not recklessness you idiot. Recklessness is when someone gives no thought to the danger they are in. Superman is never in any danger because he's effectively invincible.
        • Gir53457, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Probably the best villain superman has is Mr. Mxyzptlk simply because he could wish superman out of existence at whim. The best recent Superman story in recent years in my opinion was Emperor Joker simply because Superman had to actually resort to out witting basically God.
      • ichbeineinrcg, on 04/10/2008, -1/+2Dugg. In the Justice League Unlimited cartoon finale, when Superman finally cuts loose against Darkseid--that was great television and a great use of both characters.

        Don't hate the player--hate the writers who don't have much imagination.
    • Kohaxx, on 04/09/2008, -3/+34My main beef with Superman has always come down to he has way too many powers. You could have a character be a moral absolute who inspires people around him and cannot be killed without extremely bizzare means, but there was no reason to just write in other powers.
      Superman would have been a far cooler character from the start if his only powers were: Super Fast Flight, Indestructibility.
      THAT'S IT.
      Not Ice Breath, See-Through Things Vision, Laser Beam Eyes, Super Strength (You could've given him super strength, whatever I don't care), Being able to Breath Underwater, Super-Speed on the Ground, Being able to Breath In Space, Being able to Survive Sub Zero or Infinitely Hot Temperatures.
      I MEAN COME ON! It was so bad that he made all other DC Heroes besides Batman obsolete, why call Flash when Supes can do everything Flash can do and more, what's the point of Aquaman if technically Superman can swim faster underwater (nvm, what's the point of Aquaman at all)?
      I'm sure there's powers I forgot too, that was Superman's underlying problem all along, you can't have a character with unlimited power that the audience will start rooting for.
      • agentlame, on 04/09/2008, -1/+19Dugg for: "(nvm, what's the point of Aquaman at all)?"
        • Gir53457, on 04/10/2008, -0/+7He's just the King of Atlantis really. He also commands gigantic sea creatures and has an awesome mullet.
        • Kohaxx, on 04/10/2008, -0/+4"He's just the King of Atlantis really. He also commands gigantic sea creatures and has an awesome mullet. "
          Which is about as engaging as Geico Cavemen the tv sitcom.
        • SpencerMc, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Dude, he cut off his OWN hand (or had it bit off by a parana, depending on which continuity) and replaced it with a ***** HARPOON! Yeah, golden and silver age Aquaman was lame, but recent reimaginings of him are pretty hardcore.
      • Gir53457, on 04/10/2008, -0/+4Correct. Batman has his borderline psychosis/obsessive compulsive disorder and detective plots. The Green Arrow has his whole "I'm rich and Liberal" scenario and even the Green Lanterns are corruptible.
      • Adrianne, on 04/10/2008, -0/+11I've been saying this for years. Superman will not be interesting until they kill Lois Lane.
        Pissed off, disillusioned, crazy Superman, now that's interesting.
      • staticneuron, on 04/10/2008, -1/+1Suoerman having all those powers are fine but what annoys me about comics is when they refuse to stick to the rules that they created. Lex should have been the only person with kryptonite. Batman cannot win a fight against superman and doomsday killed superman. Everything else is just crap.
    • zzhiwen, on 04/10/2008, -1/+6how can it be true? One annoyance: he's too powerful. He's got it all. Then Batman is stronger and would win a fight?!? Please. No truth. Hate him for being boring or strong, but he'd rip Batman in half or at least cut him in two with his laser eyes.
      • Kohaxx, on 04/10/2008, -1/+4Batman just outsmarted him. The reason they're the only two stars of the DC universe is because they're polar opposites. The problems Batman solves can't be solved by Superman and the problems Superman solves can't be solved by Batman.
        What would Batman do if Lex had fired missiles to start WWIII? Exactly.
        • vspazv, on 04/10/2008, -0/+10He would have learned about it before hand and bought stock in the company building the missiles and had self-destruct codes built into them.
      • Blitz_G, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Dude just remember this the muscle can never defeat the brain.
    • Splizxer, on 04/10/2008, -1/+2Can Superman outrun the Flash?
      • ShadySpace, on 04/10/2008, -0/+5No.
      • Elliuotatar, on 04/10/2008, -1/+2I'm pretty sure I saw an episode where Superman was racing flash around the world and the Flash was keeping pace with Superman's flight speed while running on water. So probably not.
        • staticneuron, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1are you talking about smallville?

          Please...

          Superman cannot outrun the flash but he is pretty close in speed.
      • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -1/+2Yes, he has on a few occasions. 3 times I belive.
    • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -1/+1http://digg.com/comics_animation/Is_Batman_Gay_My_ ...
    • rpgmaker, on 04/10/2008, -1/+1Batman FTW!
    • jaxcs, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3This article reads like it was written by Lex Luthor.
    • theuniversal, on 04/10/2008, -0/+4It's a good article, but buys into the idea that the only story of interest involves a threat to the hero. The most interesting part of Superman is his concern for people, for humans despite their physical and moral weakness compared to him. The best Superman stories play on that theme.
      • nksoccer13, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Exactly, I found that the Superman in Kingdom Come was quite interesting because of his concern for what is right.
      • RubyTuesday, on 04/11/2008, -0/+1Yes this is one of the most inspiring things about Superman but unfortunately it almost always comes across as preachy and overly-simplistic, or preachiness from a simpleton.
    • MiddleOfNowhere, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2"Really, what lessons do the Superman comics teach? It says that mankind is full of dull, pointless weaklings and evildoers who can only be stopped by a white ubermensch from another planet, who didn't work a day in his life in order to achieve his powers. Yeah, you could say he's a symbol of "hope," but not hope in human nature – hope in an all-powerful alien who saves the world daily so you don't have to get off your butt and act like a moral person. What sort of message is that? "
      *****. Brilliant.
      This article nails down what has annoyed me about Superman for, I don’t know, the quarter of a century. He is an invincible, self-absorbed prick with no depth, flying around and holding up the status quo. A policeman who hasn't earned his badge, a quasi-fascist Mega-Rambo.
      Whenever I try to explain to people that comics can be literature, that some comic heroes have depth and authors like Alan Moore tackle complex problems, someone will inevitably mention the Man of Steel, everyone at the table laughs, and that's the end of the discussion.
  • sterntastic223, on 04/09/2008, -3/+28i really like All Star Superman and, though it's not technically Superman, Alan Moore's take on Supreme was the best Superman story ever told. But the DC editors of the 90s cemented Supe's suckage w/ the whole death/rebirth crap. I mean, that whole thing gave us Steel. STEEL!
    • LegendaryHitman, on 04/09/2008, -5/+14Just like Michael gave us Thriller...THRILLER.
    • malex, on 04/09/2008, -0/+1Dugg for Grant Morrison. God bless that ball-tripping bastard.
    • Gir53457, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3Superman should have stayed dead and have Super Girl take his place.
    • Soonago, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2All Star Superman is incredible. Dugg.
    • Math, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Lex Luthor makes a similar argument (as this article) as to why he hates Superman, when Clark Kent is interviewing him in All Star Superman.
  • AlphaR75, on 04/09/2008, -14/+45This is a great essay, well written and thoughtful.
    • mattw, on 04/09/2008, -12/+9Are you kidding? At one point he writes that it is 5 times harder to be Batman than it is to be Superman. What?!?!?! This article was a complete waste of time and never added to the discussion.
    • bubba9999, on 04/10/2008, -5/+10I agree with Matt - who gave the ***** comic book guy from the Simpsons a computer and Internet access?
      • shakbhaji, on 04/10/2008, -1/+1I disagree with you sir, but I cannot bring myself to bury a Simpsons reference.
    • DelayedEraser, on 04/10/2008, -4/+5wow those guys are dicks. I agree @AlphaR75 – this essay was excellent.
      • fixpics, on 04/10/2008, -1/+3AlphaR75 is right . Doesn't matter who is right and who is wrong. It's a quality content we have here. And this is what counts. Period.
    • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -2/+3http://digg.com/comics_animation/Is_Batman_Gay_My_ ...
      Batman is gay.
    • victorh86, on 04/10/2008, -2/+7well written my ass. you don't have to be a hardcore comic/hero fan to know this is total BS. very biased. at least defend your points. "watching your parents die is infinitely worse than hearing your biological parents died without ever having met them"....this may be true, but he leaves out the part where Superman finds out his planet blew up and is the last of his kind. i think thats a bigger ***** then what bruce wayne experienced.

      extinct race > seeing parents die
  • LegendaryHitman, on 04/09/2008, -3/+28I do have to disagree with Sterntastic, though...the best Supes story in my opinion is Kingdom Come...now that's a bad@$$ Superman...
    • dinobot, on 04/09/2008, -2/+13well, it was a more badass superman because you actually got to see a different facet of him, and even then, he still some of the flaws described in the essay (like the idea for the gulag - which falls under moral absolutism, aka, either you're with me or against me).

      And yeah, Kingdom Come is one of my favorite stories ever as well, along with Red Son; and yet, I find most of the Batman stories far more superior, basically proving that Batman > Superman
    • Vzylexy, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Man, Earth-22 Superman is so badass. Loved it when he went ape ***** towards the end of book four.
    • tzadiel, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1I also disagree with the article's author and I would like to submit a counter argument from ItsJustSomeRandomGuy at YouTube. The first part of the episode is at
      http://youtube.com/watch?v=ekuznjH0JLI
      The conclusion of the second episode is the crux of the argument, but I think both are enjoyable.
  • sethk827, on 04/09/2008, -16/+9TRUTH
  • Vaughanabe13, on 04/09/2008, -14/+27While I realize this is true, I still enjoyed watching Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman, and Smallville
    • trackerbishop, on 04/09/2008, -16/+16that's because you are a gay man, or a woman.
      • SanTe, on 04/09/2008, -11/+16...says the fan who likes a muscular guy in blue tights and red boots.
    • Mulanzo, on 04/10/2008, -6/+1figures you like the ***** stuff about supermans story. Lois and Clark and Smallville are travesties of the Superman mythos.
    • RubyTuesday, on 04/11/2008, -0/+1I loved watching the first three seasons of smallville. They were hilarious, everyone was so stupid, unobservant and they were all self-centered, self-righteous jerks. It made me laugh, so I watched two more seasons.
  • chocobomog, on 04/09/2008, -5/+136There was a comic like the one described in the Dinosaur comic: The Joker is pissed at Superman for the same reason (you can't beat him, period), so he poisons Lois Lane. The catch is the only way to save Lois is for Superman to kill the Joker and retrieve the antidote from his dead body. Superman comes very close to actually killing the Joker, but stops for the same moral reasons listed here and is content to watch Lois die. But of course, she doesn't, it was a ruse and she recovers naturally. The Joker just wanted Superman to actually kill him and then have the guilt of killing an "innocent" man on his conscience to forever corrupt him.

    I feel like such a geek. Heck, I don't even read DC comics (Marvel FTW), I just spent a long layover in an airport bookstore once... Still, this article raises some valid points.
    • LucasKane, on 04/09/2008, -0/+22Wow, never heard of that one
    • fuzzynyanko, on 04/09/2008, -1/+30Marvel actually tries to kill main characters off. However, that's gotten to be a gimmick.
    • CynicSight, on 04/09/2008, -1/+24That sounds like a badass arc... Do you remember the name of it?
    • psychochicken, on 04/09/2008, -0/+18Wow that would have made a much better movie than Superman Returns
      • Lynxpro, on 04/09/2008, -0/+5Leonard Part 6 was a better movie than Superman Returns, aka Superman Lifts and/or Scrawnyman Returns.
      • EwMo, on 04/10/2008, -3/+2are you kidding? I would have been PISSED at that ending. I would've wanted someone to die.
    • synaesthesia, on 04/09/2008, -4/+15Killing Joker would have filled Superman with the guilt of ending an "innocent" man's life? Since when the hell is Joker an "innocent" man?
      • ShugNinx21, on 04/10/2008, -0/+10The killing of an "innocent" man lies with the fact that Superman would have to essentially murder the joker in order to save Lois. yes, the Joker is a bad despicable criminal, but the value of a life taken doesn't hinge on the quality of that life, only that a life was taken. This is of course in the purest sense of protecting life which is the realm in which Superman's moral compass works. We as humans have the ability to smudge that gray area and rationale that the Joker is a bad man and thus deserved it, but for Superman, He embodies all that which is right, moral, and pure and taking a life, even that of a criminal, would be considered a heinous crime to him morally.
      • Algaroth, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Well, Superman would have killed the Joker in order to save Lois only to find out that she wasn't even dying and killing the Joker was unnecessary. Technically the Joker hadn't really committed a crime in this story. I mean, a harmless poison isn't really that bad compared to the usual crap Lois goes through.
    • cquinnd, on 04/09/2008, -0/+34 Close chocobomog, but not correct.

      (Spoilers)
      The Joker did poison Lois Lane (and made it obvious who did it), Superman contacts Batman for help. They confront Joker in Arkham, Joker tells Superman that the antitode could be had by killing him (a factor in his blood that would be generated by his demise).
      Batman convinces Supe that Joker always has a catch in his plans, and the last time Superman had to kill someone it almost drove him insane, Superman has to choose between going insane again (and becoming a super-powered threat to humanity) or letting Lois die. Batman wins the arguement and they watch Lois succumb to the poison.
      She doesn't recover... But the ruse was that the antidote was not generated in Joker's blood, but in the blood of the person who had been poisioned. So allowing her to die (temporarily) was what they needed to do to save her life.
      The decision did cause Lois to break off her engagement to Clark Kent for a short time.
      (/Spoilers)
      • duster, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1What was the arc called? That sounds awesome
        • cquinnd, on 04/13/2008, -0/+1Sorry for the late reply (I had to find the copy in my collection).
          It was Superman (in Action Comics) number 719, from 1996
      • Algaroth, on 04/10/2008, -0/+0"Honey, I'm having second thoughts on marrying you seeing as how YOU LET ME DIE!" Hilarious!
    • lamiaconfitor, on 04/10/2008, -3/+11DC is so much more well written then Marvel.
      • RubyTuesday, on 04/11/2008, -0/+1You're kidding right.

        It is such a simplistic and contrived plot, like most DC plots, except for Batman stuff.
    • Vzylexy, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Joker killed Lois in Kingdom Come.
  • LackJudgement, on 04/09/2008, -31/+4Bury me gently
    • solesoul, on 04/09/2008, -5/+13Oh hell naw, I'm gonna bury you as hard as I can bury! Prepare yourself, for the burning sting of my red thumbs down!
  • Sutarion, on 04/09/2008, -28/+178Batman > Superman
    • mik311, on 04/10/2008, -4/+1dam straight
    • logpony, on 04/10/2008, -1/+0Ha! Idea, lets take two different canons and attempt to see which one is better without any real objective point of reference! Screw you Digg. But while we're on the topic, Deadpool is the most entertaining for my money, and if you want a great character (not just a spandex monkey), go to the Comedian.
    • anotherjeff, on 04/10/2008, -7/+1Robin > Batman
  • daedalus779, on 04/09/2008, -31/+14Batman > Superman
  • Dumbledorito, on 04/09/2008, -6/+60The Indestructability thing applies to most mainstream superheroes anyway. They're protected by "marketingium" and "franchisonite" that ensures pretty much everyone in spandex will live, or at least not stay dead for long.
    • DelayedEraser, on 04/10/2008, -0/+5right, but fiction is all about suspending belief. In the world of the heroes, they ARE threatened, thus when you get into the story and forget about the medium, you feel that they are threatened too. Superman isn't even threatened within the context of the story, so even with total suspension of belief there's still no perceived danger or chance of failure.
      • Dumbledorito, on 04/10/2008, -3/+2Possibly, but Superman often gets beaten down or cut up to within an inch of his life just as much as does, say, Spider-Man; it just takes bigger baddies to do it (and with Supes, the baddy is probably armed with magic, another macguffin he's vulnerable to). In both cases, no matter how bad or severe the apparent defeat and/or injury, neither Spidey nor Superman is going to be coffin filling. The t-shirt sales alone guarantee their survival.

        It's the same reason that most Star Wars comics/books suck if they involve Lucas' principal characters; you know nothing will happen to them or that any event will significantly alter the world they live in.
        • JigoroKano, on 04/10/2008, -0/+4You must be kidding about Star Wars.

          Anakin Skywalker: died after fighting Palpatine
          C-3PO: destroyed by Vindar
          Chewbacca: crushed in the collision of Dobido with Sernpidal
          Luke Skywalker: died of old age
          Obi-Wan Kenobi: defeated by Darth Vader
          Padmé Amidala: died during child birth
          Qui-Gon Jinn: defeated by Darth Maul
          Yoda: died of old age

          Characters with unresolved endings: Han Solo, Jar Jar Binks, Leia Organa Solo, R2-D2
        • dungbeetle, on 04/10/2008, -0/+5Well great. Now I'm going to feel sad all day because I know C3PO died.
  • cerealjynx, on 04/09/2008, -8/+65He's also a huge dick.
    http://www.superdickery.com/dick/1.html
  • TipsyMcDoodle, on 04/09/2008, -1/+24All-Star Superman proves that if done right, Superman can be a very intriguing character to write for. Even Geoff John's current run on Action Comics is very intriguing. Don't blame the character, blame dull writing.
    • jakesnake86, on 04/09/2008, -0/+1Exactly. Johns run on Action Comics has been fantastic.
    • tehjarvis, on 04/09/2008, -0/+1Anything Geoff John touches is awesome. He's writing what/ 1/3 of the DC universe now? When will he run out of ideas?!
  • joshuagor44, on 04/09/2008, -14/+3I still love Superman (but Batman is better :])
    DC>MARVEL
    • Ford_Prefect2nd, on 04/10/2008, -1/+8Other then Batman all DC is black and white, even Batman's villians are black and white, the Joker is just evil.... the best DC character wouldn't even stand out in Marvel really. Marvel is all shades of grey. Daredevil, The Punisher, Wolverine, Ghost Rider etc these are all Batman esc. characters. Certainly I like Batman more then most, but the idea stands. Marvel is richer and more entertaining. Magneto is not evil for the sake of evil, Magneto wants to save his people from oppression. The Symbiat that made venom needs to prey on sentiants to survive. It only wishes to live. Even Galactus has been shown to feel horrible guilt over having to eat populated worlds. Superman is great example of the DC world. The good guys are all American heroes that brus thier teeth and never do anything wrong (other then Batman) and the bad guys breath fire and have horns.... also everyone (other then batmen) evil or good has super strength, or enhanced stregth, or gorilla strength or whatever. Look at the JLA, they are all super powered brutes.... (other then Batman). Batman belongs in marvel and then DC could go bankrupt.
      • ichbeineinrcg, on 04/10/2008, -3/+2Wonder Woman killed Maxwell Lord by nearly ripping his head off.
        Superman sent criminals to the Phantom Zone.
        The Green Arrow once killed a man, and cheated on Black Canary.

        If anything, I'd say that The Avengers have more super-powered brutes. Scarlett Witch can rewrite the entire history of the planet with a thought. She's like Mxyzlptk without the cigar and bowler hat.
  • Alix7, on 04/09/2008, -25/+17***** Superman

    If you encounter a rapist, murdering him is the morale thing to do.

    That's why Punisher pwns
    • DisposableRob, on 04/09/2008, -2/+21I read once that at this point, the Joker has a body count that dwarfs Osama Bin Laden's, so in my mind it would immoral by not killing the Joker if the option is letting him get away.
      • Lynxpro, on 04/09/2008, -0/+8Ra's Al Ghul has killed more than The Joker, but at least he's an idealist with a smokin' hot daughter to boot. If Talia put on the Princess Leia slave metal bikini, that alone would be enough to redeem Ra's, just as it did for Anakin Skywalker's dark heart.
    • Rich711, on 04/09/2008, -6/+18oh just go back to playing Halo... who really says pwns anymore?
      • Alix7, on 04/09/2008, -8/+12I do. I also still play Halo and Counter Strike. What's your point?
    • cquinnd, on 04/09/2008, -0/+9Punisher knows the difference between moral and morale.
    • owls27, on 04/10/2008, -3/+2Superman =arrogant. Batman = silent warrior
      • Rich711, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Arrogant means exaggerating ones worth. How exactly does someone that has reversed the rotation of the world and turned back time exaggerate what they are worth?

        And "silent warrior"... come on, that just makes you and Batman sound like a dooche.
  • SpoonThe, on 04/09/2008, -6/+47why do they all wear their underwear on the outside?
    • cosimo179, on 04/09/2008, -3/+8cause if they don't, people might think they're wearing g-strings under those tights...!?!?!?!?!
    • cquinnd, on 04/09/2008, -0/+11Easier to change into from street clothes.
    • boejangles, on 04/10/2008, -0/+10The have to change so fast...its a mistake
    • Kronos6948, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Keeps 'em clean. Too bad the pants suffer for it though.
    • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -6/+1Superman wears his Kryptonian costume because it is impervious to most explosions, impacts, etc. or else he would be naked all the time.

      Batman wears it because he is mostly gay.
      • highstriker, on 04/10/2008, -0/+7Shouldn't that be the other way around? Superman doesn't need a suit to protect him from explosions...
        • cquinnd, on 04/13/2008, -0/+1He doesn't need the suit for protection, he needs it because it would get expensive to have to replace your whole costume after every fight.
  • FeartheKnighted, on 04/09/2008, -30/+10But Superman will always be able to beat the ***** out of Batman.
    • cerealjynx, on 04/09/2008, -5/+10Not always, only most of the time.
      • Ford_Prefect2nd, on 04/10/2008, -0/+5Actually in nearly every event it comes up, Batman wins
    • spinaltap87, on 04/09/2008, -2/+13fail. Batman beat him in the Dark Knight Returns
      • gudnbluts, on 04/09/2008, -6/+0I love that his first line in it is something like "now get the hell out of my cave". Unfortunately the rest is pants, but it was worth it for that first beating.
        • SilentRamble42, on 04/10/2008, -0/+5That's Dark Knight Strikes Again.

          We don't talk about that one. At least not in the same sentence as Dark Knight Returns.
      • ichbeineinrcg, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Buried for confusing The Dark Knight Returns with the epic ***** that was DK2.
        But did I learn my lesson about Frank Miller? Nooooooooo. I still hustle down to the comic shop every week hoping that All-Star Batman will show the ***** up.
    • cquinnd, on 04/09/2008, -0/+1Except in the Dark Knight series.
    • kilt42, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Boo this man!
  • beefchi, on 04/09/2008, -9/+1wesley gibbons>superman
    • OpaqueMurdock, on 04/09/2008, -0/+8Wesley Crusher>Superman (He did create an entire race of sentient "nanites" after thus technically making him a god... abet a minor one.)

      Footnote: I actually don't care for STNG the "Wesley creates life and no one seems to notice" thing is one of my favorite ways to poke at fans of the show.
      • Lynxpro, on 04/09/2008, -0/+2The Doctor > Wesley Crusher. Hell, Adric > Wesley Crusher.
        • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3The Doctor > Superman... even I, SupermanRED agree.

          New Doctor Who (Series 4) is going to be awesome... Last 2 episodes are reintroducing Davros, and I have a sneaking suspicion that Doctor Who's year off next year is actually going to be the filming of a MOVIE, which they are covering up by saying they will be filming "Specials" all year long...
  • LucasKane, on 04/09/2008, -8/+3I'm sure if the writer wasn't ***** he wouldn't.
  • SoIcanDigg, on 04/09/2008, -12/+5Way to crush my childhood hero. I'm scarred for life now.
  • SwedishNinja, on 04/09/2008, -16/+8Superman is boring. He breaks the laws of physics just to beat the bad guys. OH WOW YOU CAN TURN THE WHOLE PLANET AROUND HUH?? Boooorrrriiinnngggg.
  • wtfstfu, on 04/09/2008, -9/+8somebody has been reading too many comics
    • kilt42, on 04/10/2008, -1/+4has the writer been reading too many or have you been reading too little that is the question, because everyone on digg knows that too many comics is a physical impossibility.
  • Rich711, on 04/09/2008, -6/+49Superman's weakness is that he is perfect that's what makes it interesting. He is incapable of lying or doing anything corrupt or unethical. Which when written correctly makes a really good conflict.

    And yes turning the planet around was dumb but that was one story over 50 years.
    • rmxz, on 04/09/2008, -10/+2Perfect?
      Superman has some of the vilest examples of racism this country has ever produced, like the infamous "Superman says YOU can slap a Jap" cover: http://www.superdickery.com/propaganda/1.html
      • Alexandru25, on 04/10/2008, -0/+15Uhhh don't be stupid, that was during wwII. Do not apply stupid current day PC morality to the past, it's historically and intellectually dishonest.
        • vornan19, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1So it's not canon? Please tell me there's not a cover on superdickery of you!
        • Rich711, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Who says they didn't deserve a good slap? If bombing Pearl Harbor isnt worth a good slapping than you are just a hippie pussy who Superman should slap around as well.
  • KnightMareInc, on 04/09/2008, -3/+37superman needs to get a drug habit
    • TellarHK, on 04/09/2008, -0/+1I vote for Miraclo.
    • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3You mean like Red Kryptonite in small doses?
    • nukethewhales, on 04/10/2008, -0/+6In a recent issue of Batman/Superman Supes ingested silver kryptonite which made him want to sit around and play video games all day and gave him the munchies. It was hilarious.

      He also had this badass line at the end where he says, "I understand why some people might need an escape."
  • KoalaJr, on 04/09/2008, -20/+9Superman as an idea is far superior to Batman. How many songs do you know about batman (other than the classic theme song)? If I had to guess, I'd say that Superman will be around much longer than any other superhero we have today.
  • spidoman, on 04/09/2008, -2/+55Superman is a superhero from another age. One where we wanted our heroes to be super. Not one where we want our heroes to be flawed.

    You can really look at it as a popular outlook of looking for fault in powerful people (maybe a Nixon type thing?)
    • sephiroth965, on 04/09/2008, -2/+7Yeah they had to get people's spirits up during the great depression. That's where heroes like Superman or Captain America come from. Happy thoughts sold better back then because they could distract people from the thought that their life was a piece of *****.
      • spidoman, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Now people kinda enjoy that thought.
      • Djchicken, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Yeah, but Captain America did have flaws, but still kicked ass. And he DIED. That was one of the few times they didn't just kill off a main character for an easy plot device.
    • yayster, on 04/10/2008, -2/+3Even the gods of Ancient Rome and Greece had human flaws.

    • drafhk, on 04/10/2008, -0/+6Bury me for my lack of a witty comment if you like, but Spidoman's post is incredibly insightful and deep. I'm shocked to see something like that on digg.
      • MrTito, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2Agreed, and it made me think that a modern day Superman graphic novel from that angle could be a good read. I don't read comics anymore, maybe it's been done.
      • jakesnake86, on 04/10/2008, -0/+0It has. Quite a few times
  • CynicSight, on 04/09/2008, -5/+4Just throw some Red Kryptonite at Supes and BAM! A three-dimensional character, despite the big ***** he becomes.
    • dinobot, on 04/09/2008, -1/+18Or the pink kryptonite, that way, he'll compliment Jimmy Olsen on his totally fabulous haircut (I kid you not, that was in an actual cover)
      • CynicSight, on 04/09/2008, -0/+2Oh yes, it was a Supergirl comic wasn't it? Yea... That was super.
  • MackPrime, on 04/09/2008, -1/+22It's pretty funny that Marvel's (one of) most powerful hero, the Sentry, is pretty much superman with schizophrenia
    • spinaltap87, on 04/09/2008, -0/+2What's the best Sentry title to read?
      • MackPrime, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1mighty avengers is ok.
        • dankybett, on 04/10/2008, -0/+0Start with new avengers, that shows how the avengers find him. Also Sentry Vol 1 (10 issues). I don't know if he features in anything else?
    • TellarHK, on 04/09/2008, -2/+14That's both Marvel's saving grace and ultimate cliche. Marvel can't have a good, well-adjusted hero anymore. Everyone's either all emo about "Wah, I'm a mutant, people hate me!" "Wah, I'm a huge dork who hates responsibility!" or "Wah, I'm super powerful so nobody understands me!" or they're just plain crazy.

      I like the few Marvel characters that don't whine about anything. Deadpool, the Nextwave squad. I like things with some humor to them. And, okay - I'll admit to thinking Tony Stark is a pretty fun character.
      • bainfu, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Oh the normal ones... they kill. Hence the Assassination of Cappie.
      • MackPrime, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3wah, i hate my supermodel wife !
    • Ford_Prefect2nd, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Yeah and I hate the Sentry too.
    • jakesnake86, on 04/10/2008, -1/+0Everybody hates the Sentry. I don't think i've come across anyone who doesn't
  • Zlorp, on 04/09/2008, -8/+6this guys just mad that he didnt think of it first.
  • incunity, on 04/09/2008, -15/+4Superman and Batman both kick ass. Who gives a crap about this lame article? Let me go spend 6 hours writing why Marmaduke is better than Peanuts and create a stir! Woopdee doo!
    • spinaltap87, on 04/09/2008, -0/+6Have you seen the new movies? The superman one is boring as *****
    • kilt42, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1boo this man!
  • Boohickey11, on 04/09/2008, -17/+45I have to disagree with the article: In the film Superman Returns (assuming you've seen the movie) Superman has to nearly give his life to save the world. Now that's fine and good but...oh wait... that's IT. The greatness of Superman is that he doesn't give up. He knows that he might and probably will die but he continues to fight. He is Earths savior because even when he is stripped of his near invincibility he does not stop trying to do the right thing. He inspires people to be better. Yeah, remember the movie when the woman dumps the crystals out of the helicopter. She did it because it was the RIGHT THING TO DO. She was inspired because Superman got his ass kicked in by Kevin Spacey but kept trying to get up and stop his evil plan.

    In summary, ***** you *****, Superman is my hero.
    • BadseedJR, on 04/09/2008, -4/+9This is a good point. Superman almost dies a bunch of times in the movies. He's not indestructible... at the most he's dumb for thinking he is. Another good point is "Wow, it's a ***** comic. Thanks for over analyzing it and wasting time in your life."
    • TellarHK, on 04/09/2008, -0/+9But, see, that's part of the problem. In order for Superman to have any kind of challenge to overcome, he generally needs to get his ass kicked by some inexplicably dangerous thing that's pulled out of Lex Luthor's ass. Or Kryptonite. Superman is incredibly, -incredibly- hard to write well, I'm sure. That's why in the 70's you got such truly bizarre stuff thrown about.

      Today, DC has writers like Grant Morrison and Geoff Johns who really know how to make "Big Blue" stand out and have something resembling depth. Right now, it seems to me that the biggest thing that could be done to make Superman a character encountering serious risk would be to have mass-produced Kryptonite bullets start hitting the criminal element and introduce some sort of mild resistance to the effects of it. Give Superman some kind of real weakness that's more than a three-issue arc that he beats at the end and then moves on to the next one.
    • TBoneFever, on 04/09/2008, -0/+8Yea, the bad guys always just happen to know where to get some kryptonite....

      In reality, the American government would use kryptonite to subdue superman, and alien-autopsy his ass..
    • Lynxpro, on 04/09/2008, -4/+7Dude, that movie sucked. The average poorly written episode of *Smallville* trumps that suckfest of a film. To think they chose the actor that was fired from a soap opera - not to mention losing out on the same role on *Smallville* to Tom Welling - for the role. He wasn't even (that) muscular. He wasn't Superman, he was Scrawnyman, the champion of truth, justice, and metrosexuality.
    • Soonago, on 04/10/2008, -0/+14I completely hated Superman Returns, but I dugg you for "***** you, *****. Superman is my hero."
    • incunity, on 04/10/2008, -1/+1Tom Welling would make a good Superman... admitted Smallville has had a good amount of ***** episodes... Some are just golden, though. I'd prefer him to Routh any day..
  • daxsymbiont, on 04/09/2008, -4/+2Superiority Complex.

    Do You Have It?
  • Einchy, on 04/09/2008, -0/+1Eh, could?
  • topace3000, on 04/09/2008, -5/+6I like batman more than superman too, but you don't see me bitterly trying to equate superman to some sort of right-wing white power figure just because his creators made him really powerful. This guy reads into comics wayyyy too much.
    • highligher, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1and yet clearly hasn't actually read enough superman comics cause i have read several stories where supe uses his BRAIN and skills to defeat an enemy he can't beat by punching, which actually happens often enough.
  • daxsymbiont, on 04/09/2008, -11/+6The white man supreme.

    The "aryan race"'s icon.
    • TellarHK, on 04/09/2008, -0/+6Naw. Superjew is more like it considering his creators.

      The Aryans have Captain Nazi.
      • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -0/+6He is a tribute to the story of Jesus Christ, written by two Canadian Jews. Its basically a take on the story of Christ.
        • bosssmiley, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2I thought it was an examination of the immigrant experience in the 20th century US? You know, secret identity, questions of heritage vs. adopted culture, nature vs. nurture, stuff like that...
          I can see where you get the Christ-like thing though, especially in the "Supes Returns" movie.
    • Lynxpro, on 04/09/2008, -1/+8...and created by two Jewish artists from Canada.
    • rmxz, on 04/09/2008, -0/+3Yet no less racist: http://www.superdickery.com/propaganda/1.html
    • kylere, on 04/09/2008, -2/+3In mythological terms, Superman is a sun god, just like jesus. So your petty attempt at trolling = FAIL
    • nirav72, on 04/10/2008, -0/+7If he was an aryan icon..wouldn't he have blond hair and blues eyes? Superman as long as I can remember him..always had dark or black hair and even darker eyes.
  • maskedm564, on 04/09/2008, -1/+6"I'm just gonna jump real quick, okay?"
  • chubbybubba, on 04/09/2008, -5/+49Damn illegal alien ! Someone call immigration because last time I checked Superman didn't have a work visa or a green card. He's taking away work from legit American heroes like Batman and Daredevil.
    • TBoneFever, on 04/09/2008, -1/+9His parents forged everything he needed when they "adopted" him I assume.
    • trdrstv, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2It was established that (at least post-crisis) Kal-El's birth matrix opened up for the first time on earth, so he was essentially "hatched"... in Kansas. He's a natural born american citizen.
  • OpaqueMurdock, on 04/09/2008, -2/+3Nexus>Superman

  • Dorian822, on 04/09/2008, -8/+53I have to call shenanigans. Superman does not suck.
    Why is it so freakin' bad to be so good? Honestly, why is it such a bad thing? Because it's impossible to do the right thing? Is it truly impossible to have so much power and to want to use it for good intentions?

    Superman has more angles that have been explored properly in the comics. Recently, the best angle has come in the perspective Superman has on mankind and mankind's opinion of him. When the citizens of Metropolis begin to distrust Superman for the same reasons we're listing here as well as others, we see Superman feeling like an outsider. I mean, his whole family is dead, save his adopted parents, his planet is destroyed and whenever he comes close to shards of his homeworld he becomes deathly weak and sick. Lex Luthor is constantly trying to destroy him. He has killed before (Zod, I believe in one version) and that was the only time. Everyone who judges Superman on Smallville, on the Superman movies or anything other than the comics is missing out.

    Still...my question remains, why is it so hard to like a character who DOES the right thing? Is the world that cynical? Or are some comic fans that cynical? Either way, I'll remain a fan of Superman despite the many terrible incarnations (like anything done by Bryan Singer or the idiots who hired him).
    • spinaltap87, on 04/09/2008, -5/+5Because it's boring and completely ignores the complex issues of the world today and yesterday
      • RavagesOfTime, on 04/09/2008, -3/+1Fantasy.
      • gudnbluts, on 04/09/2008, -2/+1It's possible to do if the main purpose of your perfect character is as a contrast to everything else. Dickens does it a lot, Dostoyevsky's The Idiot is the classic example.
    • OpaqueMurdock, on 04/10/2008, -3/+3It's very hard to do the right thing all the time, if he were more complex people would identify with him better. He needs to stumble once and awhile, question himself, feel greed, be ashamed, cause accidental harm, then in the face of that mounting self doubt... prevail and STILL do the right thing. (but only most of the time). (mistakes make us human... even if we are well, from krypton.)

      I have seen this done with him rarely but it never goes far enough and it always falls back on his "perfection".

      We already have a collection of stories about a "perfect guy" I read it once and it was boring too. : )
      • OpaqueMurdock, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Hmmmm, was it my last little quip about the "perfect guy" stories? Hitting a bit to close to home if I compare one dogma to another perhaps? hehe. It was mostly a joke folks, but like many others have said, I perfer my heros to be a little more on the human side and less godly. I never read Thor for example, even as a kid I asked myself, "why is he involved in our affairs?"
    • Djchicken, on 04/10/2008, -0/+4Because a story that revolves around a character who is nearly invincible and can turn back time because he can fly around the planet basically removes any hop of conflict where the outcome isn't nearly certain, hence removing the suspense, and thus, the reason for the stories in the first place.
      However, Superman could still be super if the writers could exploit the weakness of the vulnerability of those he loves, then you could get true conflict. Because there could be nothing more heart breaking than seeing Superman, who is essentially a god, fail when someone needs him. The true conflict of Superman shouldn't rely on Superman himself being hurt, but the fact that, no matter how strong you are, there will still be times when you can't make up for the weakness of those around you.
      And that, my friend, is Superman's only true weakness.
    • bosssmiley, on 04/10/2008, -0/+3Superman is America as it could and should be ("truth, justice, all that jazz"). He is the reification of the American Dream, a fantasia of the strenuous life lived in the service of others. He is all that is best in us.
      To paraphrase Mohammed Ali: "No Kryptonian ever called me a *****."
      And this is a *dull* character? 300+ comments say not.
    • shakbhaji, on 04/10/2008, -1/+3Why Smallville is still on air is totally beyond me. I've seen 3 random episodes and the acting on that show is so terrible. And since when did exposure to kryptonite give people super powers?
    • highligher, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2In alan moore's 'what happened to the man of tomorrow?' superman kills mxyzptlk and removes his own powers forever. that's some depth there.

      superman just needed better authors, like Moore
    • sergiocarvalho, on 04/10/2008, -1/+0I tend to classify stories as children tales or grownup fiction. Children tales have clearcut good/bad characters. Good are white, black are bad like in the western movies. Grownup fiction has grey characters. In real good stories, you may never be able to safely assume some character is good or bad. You identify with some personality traits, you sometimes understand the motives, but get doubts in moral evaluation.

      Superman is a children's tale. White as much as possible. No moral dilemma. No fun.
  • pyrobyro, on 04/09/2008, -10/+11Why does everyone think that Superman's only weakness is kryptonite? It's also other people, he would do anything to save someone else before himself. Batman is more self centered, he's doing everything because someone killed his parents, not because he thinks it's right.
    • TBoneFever, on 04/09/2008, -4/+2I don't think he would save Brittany Spears
  • ejrizo, on 04/09/2008, -6/+0Superman is Wack... i have always said it and this is exactly the reasons why
  • HouseofEl, on 04/09/2008, -5/+24The author suffers from the same problem that most of the writers do. They don't know how to write the character. This argument is almost always used by people that either don't understand the character on certain levels, or has a lack of imagination. The character is much more flawed and human than people think. The problem isn't the character. It's not the Boy Scout image or his morals. It's the 70 years of continuity and writing. The character has simply been around for so long that people have forgotten how to write him. Superman Returns still showed him as a God/Christ like character and that's just not what this character is as a whole. Yes there have always been religious undertones, but they were never meant to be that obvious.
    If you don't like the character, that's fine. But this article is more about lack of understanding of the character. This author uses all the same arguments again. He's not offering up any new information. He also gets the same information wrong. It's like the speech at the end of Kill Bill 2. That observation is wrong and has been shown to be wrong a number of times. The comics have been quite different for years. These arguments are based off an old version of the character that existed during the cold war. Things have changed.
  • Blasphemous88, on 04/09/2008, -1/+25I think that just because he's virtually indestructible, it doesn't make for a boring read nor does the character and plot cause mind numbing boredom as the article suggests. The storyline centers it's suspense on the people Superman is Hellbent on saving.

    Will Superman fail? Will the people live? Will he stop . This is a classic theme as old as the character itself. Neo wasn't a boring character because he wasn't able to be killed. Quite the opposite in fact. It was because of his extreme level of ability that his character was so interesting. Now Keanu Reeves may have robbed the character of depth, but that doesn't take away from the subject of his infallibility.
  • bblande, on 04/09/2008, -8/+3This article is an eloquent masterpiece that states the profound.
  • Jovensdesciple, on 04/09/2008, -14/+9You bastards hate Superman for the same reason you hate America. Anything good is evil to you and you despise it.
    • charlietuna, on 04/10/2008, -1/+4I feel the presence of a friend of Shrub close by.
  • NameTry2468, on 04/09/2008, -0/+6Dugg for Dinosaur Comics reference!
  • DaneArden, on 04/09/2008, -13/+46This article sucks. Super man is an archetype. He is what we should or could be if we weren’t week. He is the human idea, the best of humanity. He embodies all the best of philosophy and religion. When some one tries to kill him he turns the other cheek. He is bound by the law of his own will. He is capable of all evil but produce only good. This is the best of Christianity, Judaism and even philosophy (Nietzsche). Someone who dislikes someone for being good and pure is saying something about themselves. Our culture seems to like to tear heroes down (sports stars, media stars, and national leaders. Ect.)Pretty much all people have a weakness and archetype like superman doesn’t and some people don’t like having the bar set that high. But I like batman better.
    • ace144, on 04/09/2008, -3/+13The human idea is that we are all inherently flawed, and that despite these flaws we can work to improve ourselves. our choices directly effect our lives and who we are. Creating a hero that has no flaws doesn't make him the vision of an ideal human, it makes him a god. Which is why superman is boring, he never makes any choice that you couldn't have already predicted.
      • mathcreative, on 04/10/2008, -2/+3True, very true
      • DaneArden, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1The idea I was speaking about is what we become when we over come our flaws what super man is .
        I am not arguing that we are all inherently flawed but the idea is what we can become.
    • laserpig, on 04/10/2008, -4/+2Dude come on, making up a superhero and giving him like every power ever is weak sauce.
      Whoever came up with him has a complete lack of creativity.
      • thisisegn, on 04/10/2008, -0/+5Supes was practically the first, His powers were all original for a comic character when he was first introduced
      • supermanred, on 04/10/2008, -0/+7So you are saying the guys who basically created the first "SUPER HERO" had a lack of creativity? Other than Mandrake The Magician, who used magic to be a "magic enhanced hero", in 1934 ... 1938 I believe they invented the first ever Super hero... Superman..

        Lack of creativity? Give me strength, how many icons have you created? Superman is known world wide, there are over 100 songs written about him and in many languages. I believe 10 or so have hit the top 40 charts...


        • DaneArden, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Before the super heroes there where a lot of mystery men (the un super heroes) like the Phantom, Doc Savage the Shadow ect. Batman is just one of these.
    • ATLien74, on 04/10/2008, -1/+1He's still pretty boring though, especially compared to Batman.
  • BruceDude, on 04/09/2008, -3/+21Help me superman! Help me!

    My car is out of control and I can't text and drive at the same time.
    • Lokishot, on 04/09/2008, -0/+14Superman is busy right now, we're sending Aquaman.
  • notdatagain, on 04/09/2008, -5/+9I once wrote a paper on why Batman is far superior to Superman.

    True story.
  • diggduggDOOM, on 04/09/2008, -1/+5Red Son
    • Vzylexy, on 04/10/2008, -0/+1Red Son is amazing.
    • aerodash84, on 04/10/2008, -0/+2I just finished reading Red Son, and probably the best example of what Superman would be like without checks and balances. Mainly the way he was raised and the people in his life super or not.
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