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I Am A Host at The Olive Garden

gregnog.com — For about a year, I worked as a host in an Olive Garden restaurant. During that time, I made the following strips. Each strip is completely true, except for people's names, which have been changed so that they don't get mad at me. This comic is not endorsed in any way by The Olive Garden. In fact, they don't even know it exists.

Who dugg this? Made popular Jan 20, 2008

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196 Comments

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  • omnithought, on 01/20/2008, -5/+82To quote Kevin Nealon on Weeds: "I wouldn't take a ***** in an Olive garden."
  • ADeacon, on 01/20/2008, -1/+76I worked at the Olive Garden for 5 years as a waiter and throwing those coasters saved me from many, many, many hours of boredom. We once had a lady put a dead rat in her soup and claim that it came that way. Darden, who owns Olive Garden conducted an investigation and an autopsy on the rat and it turns out she had microwaved the rat.

    Thank god that part of my life is over with.
  • Sornos, on 01/20/2008, -4/+77I think this strip here sums Digg in it's entirety.
    http://www.gregnog.com/OG11.gif
  • lil_isie, on 01/20/2008, -4/+74Do y'all got pancakes?
  • schoofman, on 01/20/2008, -5/+62this kid's got some talent.
  • canandaiguan, on 01/20/2008, -6/+54I worked at the Olive Garden for a couple years.... SO captures the mood....


    oh, and ***** any of you who order the endless pasta bowl 4000 times in one meal and leave a $3 tip.
  • contradictator, on 01/20/2008, -2/+49CSI: Olive Garden

    Coming this fall to CBS!
  • ZackS, on 01/20/2008, -2/+45I have 12 of them or so as of right now. I'll keep trying to get all of them.

    Working Mirror: http://zacks.selfip.net/olive/

    Page mirror: http://zacks.selfip.net/olive/hostatog.htm
  • Zoshchenko, on 01/20/2008, -2/+45I'd really like to see his comic strips, but I don't have the patience to wait three minutes for each one to load.
  • themoosejuice, on 01/20/2008, -2/+44Didnt Kevin Rose make breadsticks for them?
  • rheaume, on 01/20/2008, -3/+44Whenever my Italian family visits me from the old country, I make sure I take them to Olive Garden to make sure they experience 'Authentic Italian food"
  • Nantel, on 01/20/2008, -2/+42Each strips on a different page...this is one server that is about to encounter a world of hurt.
  • potisreallygood, on 01/20/2008, -13/+49I went to Olive Garden for lunch with my sister and the hostess said to me "He didn't even open the door for you."...bitch
  • cerealjynx, on 01/20/2008, -3/+34I read them all, very humorous. Work-related comedy is the best, because everyone hates their job :)
  • OisinT, on 01/20/2008, -1/+31go to college?
  • clownx, on 01/20/2008, -2/+31Wow, small world.
    The Greg of Gregnog is my history teachers' cousin. She occasionally puts his comics on her chalkboard.
  • ichbeineinrcg, on 01/20/2008, -1/+29I read it as a brother and sister walk into Olive Garden, where the brother does not hold the door for the sister. The female hostess says, "He didn't even open the door for you," at which point the brother thinks, "Bitch!"

    Later, they kiss. The sister and the hostess, I mean. Any other combination incorrectly inferred from the word "they" would just be gross.
  • Mozmonster, on 01/20/2008, -22/+49What a great find! Nice strips and vignettes, also. I can't wait for the next installments of "I Am a _____ at ______" like this.
  • inactive, on 01/20/2008, -2/+27I am a member at digg digging you up.
  • chugger1992, on 01/20/2008, -0/+22I expected a Consumerist article
  • Kedyn, on 01/20/2008, -3/+24Way to kill the comment everyone.
  • inactive, on 01/20/2008, -0/+21Yeah, because Ruby Tuesday is a little mom and pop operation, right?
  • bxblox, on 01/20/2008, -1/+22Everyone says the content is redundant.... so i only go on one of the sites.
  • twinklyJesus, on 01/20/2008, -1/+21Look both ways before crossing the street.
    Never stick your hand in any place you can't see into.
    Book airfare in advance.
    If you are showering in jail, and you drop the soap, LEAVE IT.
    Always carry a roll of toilet paper in a sealed coffee can, in your car.
    Watch out for flying chairs.
    Never pet a strange dog.
    Look before you sit down.
    Never take candy from a stranger
    Eat your veggies.
    Remember your Mother's birthday.
    Never lie to anyone. Then, when you have to, they'll believe you.
    Don't ask stupid questions in a room full of smart-asses.
  • TweedleDan, on 01/20/2008, -4/+23there's nothing i like more then having to click a bunch of links to view a list or a bunch of pictures!
  • upsidedork, on 01/20/2008, -0/+19There's also this cute little boutique store called "Lane Bryant" -- it's the best-kept fashion secret in Manhattan.
  • inactive, on 01/20/2008, -0/+17Ruby Tuesday is just over priced mediocre hamburgers.
  • inactive, on 01/20/2008, -2/+18Yeah it is and vice-versa but I don't reddit, I DIGG!
  • Fergi, on 01/20/2008, -12/+27Is everything on Digg just regurgitated from Reddit? Digg me down if you want, but it makes me sad.
  • Todamont, on 01/20/2008, -3/+18omgosh loading so slowly... digg effect
  • bxblox, on 01/20/2008, -1/+16Sooooo ur in nyc a.k.a restaraunt-town usa, and went to a chain?
  • damnclem, on 01/20/2008, -5/+20***** Darden! I worked at Bahama Breeze for 2 years, and they closed our restaurant with no forewarning what so ever. One day I was slinging Mohito's, the next day I was ***** unemployed. ***** those ***** suckers!
  • moofer, on 01/20/2008, -1/+15You've never been, yet you know that it makes you feel like sh** all day? Something here doesn't add up. I smell a drama queen.
  • s0nicfreak, on 01/20/2008, -0/+13I would've said "I'm supporting her belief in feminism. She thinks that since women are equal, they can open their own doors."
  • xboxfiend, on 01/20/2008, -8/+21I can appreciate his artistic talent but these really aren't that funny.
  • DrewBlood, on 01/20/2008, -0/+13Speaking of hosting....

  • freakydingo, on 01/20/2008, -2/+14Doesn't it seem silly when a perfectly good comment like Moxmonster's get's dugg down for no particular reason? I'll join Moz so he won't feel lonely.
  • KliCk5000, on 01/20/2008, -1/+13I know exactly what you mean! I was a dishwasher and became friends with all the servers. The endless pasta bowl promotion was a couple months ago and it was so hard on everyone there. You guys work hard and get ***** tips. :(
  • mrswirl, on 01/20/2008, -0/+12People need to know and understand that all of these restaurants are owned by some kind of chain corporation so all of the food shares basically the same ingredients and suppliers.

    Olive Garden is owned by Darden Restaurants which also owns Red Lobster, Bahama Breeze, Capital Grille, and Smokey Bones and many others. There's a reason why their particular sense of blandness seems so familiar.

    Ruby Tuesday is no better. Before they spun off from Morrison's there were part of a group which included L&N Seafood Grill, Silver Spoon Cafe, Mozzarella's Cafe, The American Cafe, and Tia's Tex-Mex which were then sold to Specialty Restaurant Group, etc, etc...

    Then there's Brinker International which owns Chili's, On the Border Mexican Grill, Maggiano's Little Italy, and Romano's Macaroni Grill.

    Very few, if any of these "fast casual" restaurants are owned by a local mom & pop. Everything from their menu to the antique ***** nailed to the walls are controlled by a big corporate conglomerate.
  • twinklyJesus, on 01/20/2008, -1/+13fergi:
    I guess you missed the inception of Digg, where, the intent was to have one place to go and view links to other web sites that a socially interactive group of people find mutually interesting?
    Did you just get to Earth?
  • CSharpSauce, on 01/20/2008, -1/+12Am I the only one who is tired of Consumerist?
  • Kumaku, on 01/20/2008, -2/+13Someone really needs to make some for Wal-Mart
  • rejustify, on 01/20/2008, -4/+15He was saying that the hostess at Olive Garden called him out on not opening the door for his sister.

    Site's not handling the traffic very well. Any mirrors?
  • Chompy, on 01/20/2008, -6/+17But the hostess said "he", which implies that the sister is a male.. unless there is a third party. It would not make sense to rebuke potisreallygood with that sentence, then the hostess would be saying "*you* didn't even open the door for *her*".

    Understand?
  • Coolone84, on 01/20/2008, -3/+14It only got like the first 3 or 4 comics :( Thanks though
  • Coolone84, on 01/20/2008, -3/+13The server is starting to have a melt-down, someone post a mirror plz?
  • JohnboiWaltune, on 01/20/2008, -2/+11They should have told him the place was closing, and offered him a good severance check if he stuck around until the closing. That is the moral way to do it.
  • Chompy, on 01/20/2008, -4/+12Those people can't even read.
  • Disease, on 01/21/2008, -0/+8Nerd
  • ZackS, on 01/20/2008, -2/+10Server is basically dead. Mirror?
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