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291 Comments
- piieerrrree, on 11/30/2009, -8/+639so the pipes can handle shampoo/conditioner/soap/dirt etc, but not semen? Why the ***** not?
- Orbital101, on 11/30/2009, -8/+463This is how we know it's fake.
- KarlH, on 11/30/2009, -3/+404"Semen related costs run into the thousands every year."
More if you count child support. - chadsterrr, on 11/30/2009, -2/+361Yeah, I bet its much less costly to scrub a semester's worth of jizz out of the carpet next to the computer desk.
- HeDiggMe, on 11/30/2009, -2/+349Lost count of how many school letterheads I've seen this on.
- KingGorilla, on 11/30/2009, -6/+282If you are familiar with your semen as I am with mine then you would know that the fluid, after being expelled, instantly solidifies in water. Think of it as rubbery cooked egg whites.
Ah yes jerking off in the shower. This will be the highlight of my day. - DeMarki, on 11/30/2009, -6/+241I thought the whole point of going to college was to finally stop masturbating and start getting some pussy.
- BuryMePlease, on 11/30/2009, -4/+234Elaine: "Why couldn't you just wait?"
George: "I was there. I saw a drain."
Elaine: "Since when is a drain a toilet?"
George: "It's all pipes. What's the difference?"
Elaine: "Different pipes go to different places! You're gonna mix them up!"
George: "I'll call a plumber right now!" - DaviDTC, on 11/30/2009, -4/+224The costs are probably in the millions now considering how old this is.
- ASSASSYN360, on 11/30/2009, -0/+217Finally someone put a masturbation topic in the offbeat section where it belongs.
- timmywiff, on 11/29/2009, -2/+217How many cleaning the pipes jokes can people make?
- dnields, on 11/30/2009, -8/+215How many times does this need to be submitted to Digg?
Jan 30, 2007
http://digg.com/odd_stuff/University_of_Michigan_S ...
Jun 12, 2007
http://digg.com/odd_stuff/PIC_Masturbation
Aug 3, 2008
http://digg.com/comedy/Masturbation_9
Oct 2, 2008
http://digg.com/comedy/Masturbation_Warning_at_the ...
Sep 6, 2009
http://digg.com/comedy/Masturbation_University_of_ ...
This same thing has also been faked and posted several times for Durham University. - Narishma, on 11/30/2009, -1/+186One doesn't prevent the other.
- Solkre, on 11/30/2009, -0/+156So... how much does it cost to have semen certified pipes installed in my house?
Actually, I had a vasectomy, so I'm shooting diet semen, or semen zero if you will, does that matter in this case? - krayzee911, on 11/30/2009, -0/+148...all of the flavor, none of the guilt?
- mikbunn, on 11/30/2009, -1/+133I'm pleased that I finished eating my eggs before reading this.
- caramba421, on 11/30/2009, -2/+111Because all of the products you mentioned are designed specifically to be water-soluble.
Also, the soap is the reason that oil and grease don't clog up the drains frequently. The defining characteristic of a soap is that one end of the molecule is polar so it binds to water via H-bonds, and the other end of the molecule is non-polar, so it binds to oils via London Dispersion Forces. This is why soap gets the grease off your skin, and why it continues down the drain relatively unhindered, so we don't have to unclog grease from drains with as much frequency as we would otherwise.
Semen, on the other hand (no pun intended), is composed of sperm, and the fluid it is carried in. Once the fluid washes away, you are left with a retentate solid that is not water-soluble. Probably not a problem for one household, but if you can imagine the impact of 1000 18-year-olds wanking it every morning, and you'll be left with a sticky situation on your hands. - vodka357, on 11/30/2009, -0/+92Informative but gross
- Schmapdi, on 11/30/2009, -6/+94You would think all the soap/shampoo/water also going down the drain would dissolve any semen.
- pandawa, on 11/30/2009, -1/+81o sweet jesus
- badenglishihave, on 11/30/2009, -1/+81jizzus*
- nbrustin, on 11/30/2009, -10/+81So where are you supposed to masturbate? Semen in landfills is big problem too as it makes all the garbage sticky and slows down breakdown of organic matter due to a process called gizzosis.
- TyIzaeL, on 11/30/2009, -0/+71Huhuh... beat.
- julianmaestas, on 11/30/2009, -1/+71dugg for American Beauty reference
- agentsrecord, on 11/30/2009, -0/+70Wanking is serious business.
- gsfgf, on 11/30/2009, -0/+66Same reason cell phones make airplanes crash.
- urik88, on 12/01/2009, -0/+65You don't stop using a PSP just because you got a PS3.
- vodka357, on 11/30/2009, -2/+62I'm not going to let my human right to jerkoff to be trampled upon. GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GET ME A HOOKER!!!! VIVE LA FRANCE!!!!
- StanC, on 11/30/2009, -4/+64Semen can't be broken down in water. It is similar to snot actually, both of them act like slime in the pipes. When you get enough people doing it it becomes a serious issue. I forget the institute but it was so bad that they even threatened to match the DNA to the residents if they didn't stop.
- bated321, on 11/30/2009, -4/+61Can a god delete your life?
- RAAFStupot, on 11/30/2009, -3/+53It's all pipes!
- gankige, on 11/30/2009, -5/+54They should change the school mascot to The Fapper.
- boo3710, on 11/30/2009, -0/+48Jerry: "Alright can we just stop with this pee pipe stuff here?!"
- mynameisdi, on 11/30/2009, -4/+50In Soviet Russia, the pipes jerk you off.
- inkubusfan, on 11/30/2009, -0/+46SHOULD be in the beatoff section.
- blitz718, on 11/30/2009, -2/+46We had showers clog at stony brook because of this, they sent out a similar memo last year
- chadsterrr, on 11/30/2009, -1/+43@ badenglishihave
You have to EARN it - sRees00, on 11/30/2009, -0/+41who aims their load at the carpet? I try and hit the ceiling.
- Rikushix, on 11/30/2009, -0/+40Whether or not it's buoyant is a moot point, it doesn't affect that fact that semen isn't soluble.
And on that note I just want to point out "ejaculate into some water and tel me how that turns out for you" is the weirdest thing I have read on digg in a long, long time. - brucealmighty, on 11/30/2009, -7/+46See, this could all be prevented by a more enlightened policy on student ho's. The mandatory extracurricular fees should include unlimited access to local ho's....thereby eliminating the problem!
- houi, on 11/30/2009, -2/+40unlke semen, soap/shampoo will dissolve in water
- Enkairi, on 11/30/2009, -0/+37They had the same problem at Virgina Tech.... in an all guy dorm....that was 7 floors. The amount of clogging it caused was unreal.
- ruretarded, on 12/01/2009, -1/+37incorrect. semen is water soluble.
sperms are animal cells, composed of cell membrane and cytoplasm (and other things). when cells are immersed in water, since the solute concentration (think salt concentration) within the cell membrane is higher than water, water will move INTO the cell to balance the concentration (osmosis), leading cells to burst (hypertonic to hypotonic).
solutes (think salt) in the cell actually won't flow out of the cell to balance (this is called diffusion), since cell membrane is not solute permeable. however, membrane is water permeable.
sperms solidify only when contact w/ hot water. this is because, before the sperm have the chance to explode (due to osmosis), the cells are cooked very much like egg white turns white and rigid.
therefore, to wash off sperms, please use COLD water first, to make sperms water soluble by bursting cell membrane.
In the same way, when you wash any bed sheet or article of clothing containing blood stain (menstrual cycle blood for girls), use COLD water, as water will also burst red blood cell and thus wash away the stain. Using hot water will solidify RBC and lead to permanent staining. - whahaa, on 12/01/2009, -0/+36I've pleased myself.
- badenglishihave, on 11/30/2009, -0/+36beatoff section?
- blitz718, on 11/30/2009, -1/+34I wonder if anyone got pregnant using a bidet
- Kruse, on 11/30/2009, -5/+37University of Michigan must be full of wankers.
- PhoenixAvatar2, on 11/30/2009, -0/+30Dugg for semen zero. I'm saving that one.
- ShyGuy91284, on 11/30/2009, -3/+33I dare anyone living in a dorm to take a UV lamp to the floor to see the years worth of man-jizz. Or better yet, the mattress....
- Nova437, on 11/30/2009, -2/+29poorly. ejaculate into some water tell me how that turns out for you. 20 bucks it sinks to the bottom. if not see a doctor or check your water
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