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846 Comments
- inactive, on 06/16/2008, -82/+1193Buried as inaccurate.
- SnardTB, on 06/16/2008, -14/+969"A Supreme Court in Geaorgia ruled that high school biology teachers were permitted to continue using the term 'evolution' when teaching their classes. However as a compromise, they must now refer to dinosaurs as 'jesus horses'." -Weekend Update
- asskicker32, on 06/16/2008, -18/+750The son of MY god would be riding a flying dinosaur.
- wontstoptalking, on 06/17/2008, -7/+552"Rapturous Red"
"Perfect White"
"Behemoth Blue"
"Leviathan Green"
"Omnipotent Yellow"
"Flesh of Christ"
FTW!! Where the hell can I buy that crayola set? - sandersdamnit, on 06/16/2008, -15/+455***** yes, the J-man definitley rode dinosaurs, Him and the apostles formed Dino Squad : 33 A.D.
- sfrench, on 06/16/2008, -8/+435Rapture ~= Raptor
Coincidence... I think not. - asskicker32, on 06/16/2008, -3/+409exactly. Everyone knows the raptors were feathered.
- limestarch, on 06/17/2008, -17/+390Matthew 8:2 And, behold, there came a leper dinosaur and worshipped him, saying, Lord, if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean.
8:3 And Jesus put forth his hand, and touched him, saying, I will; be thou clean. And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.
8:4 And Jesus straightway jumped on the dinosaur and departed hence, to the synagogue reaping mass destruction. - wontstoptalking, on 06/17/2008, -25/+328
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Dad, did dinosaurs really exist?
Sure they did, son. The Bible says so. They didn't call them "dinosaurs" back then, but instead they were known as "leviathans" or "behemoths".
But, my science teacher says dinosaurs lived millions of years ago. Is that true?
Of course not, son.
Then how old are they?
Well, let's see. The Bible tells us [from Adam and Eve's family tree] that the Universe is only a few thousand years old. So dinosaurs had to have lived within the past few thousand years. That's simple logic, son.
Oh. So that means they were on Noah's Ark?
Absolutely! The Bible says two of every animal were brought [by God] to the ark. Dinosaurs were animals. So, using your logic again son, dinosaurs had to be on the ark.
Huh. So how come scientists say they're older than that? and died way before Jesus?
Well, son, they just make that up. Dinosaur bones don't have labels on them to tell how old they are. In fact, there is no proof whatsoever that the world and its fossil layers are millions of years old. No scientist saw dinosaurs die-
Dad!
No I'm serious. Scientists only find the bones in the here and now, and because many of them are evolutionists, they try to fit the story of the dinosaurs into their view.
That's sad. But I thought scientists were smart?
Sure, but they don't know everything. So they have to make stuff up to fit their beliefs. While you and I, we have the facts, straight from the Bible.
I don't want to be a scientist!
Ha! That's ok, son. It's better to be right, than smart. C'mon, wanna learn how to flip burgers like your Dad?
Yeah! - nymphetamine, on 06/17/2008, -14/+278I'm pretty sure Jesus WAS a raptor.
- wontstoptalking, on 06/17/2008, -18/+277"Flesh or Christ".
Best. Crayola color. EVER. - rentmitchum, on 06/17/2008, -2/+235Jesus's vision is based on movement.. if you masturbate really slow you won't be a sinner.
- cappa1983, on 06/16/2008, -34/+240There's a whole book about this...? MY GOD what are we doing to our children!
- cnot3, on 06/17/2008, -8/+198Jesus must have been exalted with the trolls.
- Haecceity, on 06/17/2008, -7/+155Absolutely. Jesus wasn't flesh-colored. He was brown.
- Torx, on 06/17/2008, -6/+151Jesus wore a cape? Rode a dinosaur? I sense an upcoming superhero movie.
- badassninja, on 06/17/2008, -9/+144Your face is inaccurate.
- rkho, on 06/17/2008, -49/+173***** THE RIAA!
- purelithium, on 06/17/2008, -1/+116It's sad, because this conversation, or some permutation thereof, has taken place in millions of homes across America...
- cpizanias, on 06/17/2008, -0/+107Wow..."Perfect White." They must have added that color after they discontinued "Slavery Black."
- Rotzooi, on 06/17/2008, -1/+105This is just page 8. Where is the rest?! It looks awesome.
- TheGroje, on 06/17/2008, -0/+98"Scientists only find the bones in the here and now"
Jesus rode bareback. Hence the lack of saddles found with the dinosaur bones. - lamiaconfitor, on 06/17/2008, -0/+91That's it, new religion!
- Radica1Faith, on 06/17/2008, -3/+93That is ***** badass. If I saw that as a kid, I wouldn't be agnostic right now
- brstilson, on 06/17/2008, -5/+94Your mom is inaccurate and I had sex with her as well.
- Schmidtopolis, on 06/17/2008, -3/+92You'd think the colour "Flesh of Christ" would be a little darker... I mean, seriously, if Jesus was real his wasn't some white European.
- wontstoptalking, on 06/17/2008, -28/+111Based upon this religion, if you cannot prove it false, than it's true! So I guess you are the real "inaccurate" one here.
- zdiddy85, on 06/17/2008, -5/+88Dugg as accurate.
- GorfTron, on 06/17/2008, -13/+84We know that priests ride the altar boys.
- flashback99, on 06/17/2008, -9/+79If you're teaching this to your child, you are a child abuser.
- flashingcurser, on 06/17/2008, -1/+68Ummm some flesh colors are brown, even black I'm told.
- eight3446, on 06/17/2008, -0/+66of?
- Pzycho, on 06/17/2008, -3/+65I like to picture my Jesus riding a dinosaur cause I like to party, and I like my Jesus to party.
- plaing, on 06/17/2008, -1/+60No wonder I stand untasered.
- mikeyrock, on 06/17/2008, -7/+66obviously fake.. jesus was black
- browwiw, on 06/17/2008, -1/+57The son of My god would be slaying flying dinosaurs while astride a levitating sabretooth tiger.
- kabes, on 06/17/2008, -9/+64Another fine excerpt from "How to lower your child's IQ by 50 points in only one day!"
I find it to be an invaluable parental tool.
Another excerpt: http://bp1.blogger.com/_r7sRAEiPKm8/R81y1vPo7lI/AA ... - champa, on 06/17/2008, -5/+59Comment was worth a bury!
- smacksaw, on 06/17/2008, -1/+54No wonder I taste unsalted.
- Mkrakstad, on 06/17/2008, -5/+53Jesus had a cool mount.... :-p
- Arcesius, on 06/17/2008, -0/+48Oh.... my.... god... That is the quote of the past two millennia.
- silverbulletky, on 06/17/2008, -8/+55Agreed.. it should have been Obama on that dinosaur.
- ChocChunkOaties, on 06/17/2008, -0/+47"Sure, but they don't know everything. So they have to make stuff up to fit their beliefs. While you and I, we have the facts, straight from the Bible."
this is so much more worse than that guy who thought the earth was flat isn't it?
Creationists: Evolutions dropouts. - crazyjake, on 06/17/2008, -0/+46put some laser on that dinosaur, and i am a follower!!
- Farmer77, on 06/17/2008, -0/+46I need to get a printed T-shirt with that.
- netdroid9, on 06/17/2008, -2/+47Yeah, they used pink crayon instead of actually grafting on the flesh of Christ.
- SQLserver, on 06/17/2008, -16/+61There is a pathetic side to this?
Do you realize how many of their "lolz look at this cave paintings@!!!" are from the MIDDLE AGES?
That famous "Stegosarus"? It's known to be from over 1000 AD.... I spoke to several Creationists recently who actually where like "HA! OK!!!! THIS PROVES KNIGHTS FOUGHT DRAGONS!!!"
Creationists are Insane. They jump on any piece of 'evidence' they can find, which usually diggs them even deeper into their hole.
Take their 'lolz comets degrade, without Oort cloud or kupier belt the earth is young!!!!!" theory.
The comet with the shortest period is Encke's comet, with a period of only 3.3 years. Putting this together with the claim that "a comet will disintegrate completely within 50 to 60 revolutions of the solar system", we find that, using the Creationist method, the Universe is no more that two hundred years old!
According to Creationists, Jesus never even Existed. - facereplacer, on 06/17/2008, -0/+44Nothing brings me back to 3rd grade quite like a jaunt through the digg comments
- Jeffler, on 06/17/2008, -7/+48COMMENT WAS WORTH A C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
- luke16, on 06/17/2008, -0/+41Page 10: Jesus divides by 0 and survives
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