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I Refuse To Let Some Beached Whale Ruin Our Family Outing

theonion.com — We should move into the shade. Here, let's sit in front of the whale's belly. It casts a nice big shadow. What "tube thing," Joshua? Oh, that. Well, I suppose that the whale's a boy, and that's the thing it goes to the bathroom with. You have one of your own, Joshua, so you should know. Only yours isn't eight feet long, is it? No, don't touch it!

Who dugg this? Made popular Jul 5, 2008

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21 Comments

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  • deathlyhallows, on 07/05/2008, -3/+25June 23, 2004! It took four years for this to get on the front page?
  • DonSlice, on 07/05/2008, -7/+24The Onion does not ALWAYS equal funny, people. You don't have to submit it just because it's The Onion.

    This one is buried for Lame.
  • Red1Delta, on 07/05/2008, -2/+122004 called.......it wants the reelections examined
  • jayistheman, on 07/05/2008, -3/+11Your comment is almost totally invalid. How many onion stories are on the front page? Seriously?

    I wasn't too impressed either, but it's not like it's XKCD.
  • atarijedi, on 07/05/2008, -6/+12I found this quite stupid.
  • banmaster, on 07/05/2008, -0/+4What the ***** was the point to that story??
  • Asheis, on 07/05/2008, -1/+5I don't know why you're getting dugg down.. this was a really boring onion article.
  • inactive, on 07/05/2008, -0/+3"It's so typical of our family for one of you to faint from the sulfurous gas fumes produced by the putrefying innards of a beached sperm whale."

    A truly epic line.
  • Samo89, on 07/05/2008, -0/+3wait for real?

    sad truth of the matter is i can think of some ppl that are/will grow up to be like that
  • inactive, on 07/05/2008, -1/+3Long story short lady refuses to let a dead whale ruin her day at the beach - repeated 50 times. The sarcastic tone was annoying as well. ITS BURY TIME
  • XxERMxX, on 07/05/2008, -1/+3The Onion sometimes fails.
  • diemunkiesdie, on 07/05/2008, -0/+2Who else thought this was an article about fat people ruining her family outing?
  • AngeloM3, on 07/09/2008, -0/+1Pics or it never happened.
  • BedPost, on 07/05/2008, -1/+2Wow, that didn't get boring after the 2nd paragraph.
  • BloodWenis, on 07/05/2008, -0/+1The sea was angry that day, my friends...like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli!
  • gemini8200, on 07/05/2008, -4/+4That was odd..
  • erad222, on 07/05/2008, -1/+1WHITE. WHALE. HOLY. GRAIL.
  • Asheis, on 07/05/2008, -1/+1I know, right? this was stupid well into the first couple lines.
  • xchino, on 07/05/2008, -2/+2very lame. I am dissappointed in the onion.
  • arfandualo, on 07/05/2008, -4/+2WTF?
  • CarlosReyes, on 07/05/2008, -7/+1Well obviously something such as a whale shouldn't interrupt the flow of your day.

    Well played ma'am!

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