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51 Comments
- Cancerkitty, on 09/28/2009, -1/+52But what about animated gifs? Surely, the more the better, right?
- inactive, on 09/28/2009, -0/+29No wonder I have so many problems....
- D0P3M4N, on 09/28/2009, -0/+28Be sure to include those smilies you got from that flashing banner ad on that porn site.
- cated, on 09/28/2009, -0/+25- ALL CAPS ARE YOUR FRIENDS. Exclamation points come in a close second!!!!!
- Be sure to request a read-receipt. People love these.
- Large attachments are a nice surprise, particularly if they have the wrong extension.
- Bonus points: when having an e-mail "conversation", be sure to reply multiple times with a single sentence or even single word every time you think of something new to say (and before the other person responds). Be sure you copy the entire e-mail thread each time. - torgo112, on 09/28/2009, -1/+20Every time I get a read receipt I want to stab the person who sent it.
- decet, on 09/29/2009, -0/+17I always compose my mail in a painting program (Gimp, for instance), and then export it to a large .tif file, the more pixels, the better. Then I include it into the main message. Recipients often get highly excited about this.
- nahsrocketeer75, on 09/28/2009, -0/+15Do the people who send this kind of e-mail actually *receive* any? If so, WTF?
- daviz0, on 09/29/2009, -0/+15i see, so this is why i not been receiving replies from potential employers, wow and i thought it was my cv, well im gonna go and resend them, this time all in caps with more excalmations points with a smiley face near my name and contact details :)
wish
me
luck
guys
Sincerely,
Joe Blow
Master Blower
Joe's Blowing, LLC
PO Box 12
123 First Street
*****, NY, 12345
phone: (212) 212-2112
cell: (212) 211-1122
fax: (212) 212-2111
toll free: (800) 212-2121
www.joeblows.com
www.facebook.com/joeblows
www.twitter.com/jowblows
joe@joeblows.com - AhhhFuck, on 09/29/2009, -0/+15FWD:FWD:FWD:FWD:FWD:FWD: LOL!!!!!!!!!
- AdmiralAcbar, on 09/29/2009, -0/+14Corel Presentations, Powerpoint is too popular.
- AmyVernon, on 09/28/2009, -0/+14I don't know if I even want to know what that means.
- Zipko, on 09/29/2009, -0/+14Don't over use Comic Sans. That font is only for when you're really ready to close the deal. When it comes down to crunch time, pull that font out and people will know you mean serious business. By reserving it only for critical emails you won't dilute the true meaning of the font.
- speedk0re, on 09/29/2009, -0/+13Read Receipts are the best feature in Outlook. I can't put a dollar sign on the amount of joy I get rejecting those requests every time I see them.
- AaronPDX, on 09/29/2009, -0/+10My moron of a boss does every single one of these on a daily basis.
- inactive, on 09/29/2009, -0/+10I would seriously punch someone in the penis if they did that to me.
- andytronic, on 09/29/2009, -0/+10Now, how to forward this article to my mom without seeming like a hypocrite.
- MacBookForMe, on 09/28/2009, -1/+11I'll never learn, but I don't care...rather dream about my secretary and a ficus
- MacBookForMe, on 09/28/2009, -1/+9Ok, there's an old saying in Slovenia, that it doesn't really matter how important boss you are as long as you have a secretary and a ficus (robusta or retusa or benjamina or whatever...) in your office.
http://paterson-si.livejournal.com/65565.html - CourageWulf, on 09/29/2009, -0/+8Those are sentimental to me.
- iheartbakon, on 09/28/2009, -1/+9Always include a powerpoint presentation (or other proprietary file) and assume the recipient has the software to open it.
- CDNChaoZ, on 09/29/2009, -1/+9*****, NY = NJ?
- fraggley, on 09/29/2009, -0/+7Too many people need to read this, I received an email with a bright pink background today!!
- blackhole82, on 09/29/2009, -0/+7some people are just more awesome than others and they want to convey that fact through email
- iPwnN00bs, on 09/29/2009, -0/+6I'd rather jerk off with a cheese grater.
- jedinate, on 09/29/2009, -0/+6I was wondering where my Aunts got their emailing instructions from !
- TheScotsman1980, on 09/29/2009, -0/+5No myspace page?
- pinkpackrat, on 09/28/2009, -1/+6Those Slovenian offices sound pretty racy-- be sure the ficus plant doesn't drop its leaves :-)
- leif777, on 09/29/2009, -0/+5And don't forget to change the background color to lime green and change the font to hot pink.
- AdmiralAcbar, on 09/29/2009, -0/+5***** off.
- Awwzm, on 09/29/2009, -0/+5You need to ***** die!
- inigomntoya, on 09/29/2009, -0/+4Only if they have a flashing black and white background.
- IKORKYI, on 09/29/2009, -2/+6http://imgur.com/PZBPG.gif
- Anussel5559, on 09/29/2009, -0/+3I think it left out a crucial part to making an email stupendous: EMOTICONS! the more the merrier! what better way to annoy :) people :( then :D to :3 put :P and :) emote :$ after ;) every ;( word? <(^_^)>
- rogeris, on 09/29/2009, -1/+4Someone's been reading my inbox!?!?!?!?!!?!!!?!!!?!?!
- mrcribbs, on 09/29/2009, -2/+5Not as funny as I thought it would be.....!!!!!!
- AmyVernon, on 09/28/2009, -1/+4I do.
- AaronPDX, on 09/29/2009, -1/+4I can't wait for Google Wave to fix this issue.
- H3llr41s3r, on 09/29/2009, -0/+3Dugg for: "Forward Emails to People Who Have Already Gotten Them"
- ShiftyBizniss, on 09/29/2009, -0/+2@MacBookForMe - If I don't know what a ficus is, I sure as well won't understand the rest of 'em.
- zip000, on 09/29/2009, -0/+2Someone that I used to work with used to do your Bonus point suggestion all the time. I'd send him an email, and within 5 minutes I would have 6 or 7 emails from him with various unimportant edits to his first email.
Eventually, I just stopped sending him emails...unfortunately, talking to him in person was pretty much the same thing; you had to gnaw your arm off to get out of his office.
Glad he's gone. - onederboy, on 09/29/2009, -0/+2I'm pretty sure everyone in my office already has, and has since followed it to a T.
- sevenalive, on 09/29/2009, -0/+2There was a woman at my old job that did the font, color, and punctuation thing. About 80% of her emails she would resend again because she screwed up something. She also used glitter text. The woman was at least 34. All of the other points in the article my supervisor did.
NoW tHeY neED TO dO a YoUTuBEz aND mySpACE oNE!!!!!!!!! - secrity, on 09/29/2009, -0/+1Uff da, why is it that the non-technical women at work use Outlook "letterhead"? I hate to read email with a cat, leaves, or American flag background (yeah, she was a Republican). I also hate vendors that use a graphic logo signature.
- AaronPDX, on 09/30/2009, -0/+1Actually, I forgot my facebook is also set up to automatically pull my Digg comments.... fortunately for me, I've only got other people at work who hate this boss as well friended there.
- zeabu, on 09/29/2009, -0/+1at least 34... who she must have been a dinosaur already.
- zeabu, on 09/29/2009, -0/+1yellow on a white background is nice to read too.
- antdude, on 09/29/2009, -0/+1What about giant signature's ASCII arts? [grin]
- piieerrrree, on 09/29/2009, -0/+1*than :U
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Show 51 - 54 of 54 discussions
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