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8 Types Of Annoying People You’ll Find Inside Starbucks
holytaco.com — Starbucks employees and customers.
Krezer- 3745 diggs
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- yorkhock, on 05/22/2008, -26/+334I think I once saw a Starbucks inside of another Starbucks. Still sucked.
- deadnoob, on 05/22/2008, -56/+2No you didn't.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -4/+33Stick.....ass......
Remove it. - jlmillstein, on 05/22/2008, -7/+1"Therefore, these people go to the busiest Starbucks and pop open their iMac."
Ignorant Mac haters.- jgtg32a, on 05/22/2008, -7/+1How many PCs have you seen at a Starbucks?
Thats what I thought
- jgtg32a, on 05/22/2008, -7/+1How many PCs have you seen at a Starbucks?
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -4/+33Stick.....ass......
- 2smooth4u, on 05/22/2008, -1/+22Here at Dell in Oklahoma City, we actually have a Starbucks built in. The funny thing is, I'd rather purchase an energy drink at 7-11 for $1.50 than waste money inside my building allowing them to percolate even more gourmet gouging.
- sockpuppets, on 05/22/2008, -2/+17You're gettin a latte, dude!
- patik, on 05/22/2008, -1/+34You mean, "dude, you're getting a latte".
- sockpuppets, on 05/22/2008, -1/+56I was concerned with copyright violations.
- t0x2c, on 05/23/2008, -1/+3Slogans fall under trademark, not copyright.
- sockpuppets, on 05/22/2008, -2/+17You're gettin a latte, dude!
- AustinGoodchild, on 05/22/2008, -9/+1... ON COFFEE! HA HAR
- Willravel, on 05/22/2008, -16/+4How exactly does one pop open an iMac? OH, you mean MacBook or MacBook Pro. That's kinda sad.
- bbardlbradd, on 05/22/2008, -6/+7Yes, it was a mistake, and no it's not a Macbook.
Before the Macbook was the *iBook*. The one in the picture is a 14" iBook G4.
iBook/iMac, it's a common mistake for people who don't know the difference.- breadfred, on 05/22/2008, -0/+21It's a ***** laptop with an Apple logo on it.
- Willravel, on 05/22/2008, -3/+2Who still has an iBook? No, the article clearly intended to name hardware that's less than 2 years old. They just happened to be so computer illiterate that they grabbed a pic of what's likely a 3 year old computer, and then called it an iMac for good measure.
I'm surprised that they managed to avoid posting a picture of the iBook clamshell and calling it a Compaq. - jgtg32a, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Jesus willravel, calm down
- spydergt488, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Screw Starbucks and screw you guys, I'm going home.
- nate12o6, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1I have a feeling that you fit the personality of #3 on the list.
- bbardlbradd, on 05/22/2008, -6/+7Yes, it was a mistake, and no it's not a Macbook.
- FlyingSpaghetti, on 05/22/2008, -1/+28There are actually 13 types of Starbucks drinkers. However, the final 5 haven't been revealed yet.
- 10lbhammer, on 05/22/2008, -0/+14actually, I think the description said it all, and there are only two types of annoying people in starbucks...
starbucks employees and customers. - Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -2/+13You have to defeat guy #4 to unlock them.
- ExSlashdotter, on 05/23/2008, -2/+3Congrats on the funniest digg comment of the day.
- andburn1, on 05/23/2008, -0/+4I wonder if one of them is Starbuck?
- spacewhale1, on 05/23/2008, -1/+0wow way to ruin it
great orginal comment tho
thunbs up
- spacewhale1, on 05/23/2008, -1/+0wow way to ruin it
- 10lbhammer, on 05/22/2008, -0/+14actually, I think the description said it all, and there are only two types of annoying people in starbucks...
- ilifecomputer, on 05/22/2008, -3/+1Conan O'Brien joke.....
- pedepy, on 05/22/2008, -1/+1what makes you say yorkhock ain't Conan ?..
- Jethdm, on 05/22/2008, -7/+1There was this stand-up comic who said he walked out of one starbucks, and directly in front of him, across the street, was another starbucks. He was all saying how it relates to the end of the world and *****, funny stuff. However, if there really is 2 starbucks across from each other, I'm gonna have to agree with him on this whole end of the world business.
- humperdeath, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7Lewis Black. "The end of the Universe" I love that one!
- fr3nch13, on 05/22/2008, -0/+11There is at least one Starbucks directly across from another Starbucks. It's in East Lansing, MI. There is a stand alone store direclty across from a Barnes and Nobles with a very large Starbucks in it. Litterally 100ft from each other.
BTW, Go Green!- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -0/+6There's a mall in Portland with two Starbucks, one on the second floor and one on the fourth floor. So that's a Starbucks on top of a Starbucks.
- Daniel591992, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3The Palisades Mall in NY has three (and one Dunkin' Donuts).
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -0/+6Buried for not knowing Lewis Black's name. Let this be a lesson to you.
- Fixhotep, on 05/23/2008, -0/+0Lewis Black said that about Houston (River Oaks technically). I live not too far from there. They are directly across the street from one another. And it's not like a 10 lane highway.... it's just two lanes.
- isayre020888, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1In Wichita, KS there is a Starbucks in a grocery store right across the street from a starbucks.
It baffled me the first time I realized they were right across from each other.
- kmiller2087, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3they call that the end of the universe. did it happen to be in houston texas?
- YMBwithVD, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1Son of a bitch! Do you see what I see? I think it's time we had a cup of joe.
- deadnoob, on 05/22/2008, -56/+2No you didn't.
- mrbubby, on 05/22/2008, -5/+626My favorite Onion Headline of all time - "Starbucks Opens Inside Bathroom of Another Starbucks"
- doogly, on 05/22/2008, -0/+53http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29030
- greenwald, on 05/22/2008, -0/+11This is similar to the great bit in the movie Dogshow where the neurotic suburban dog owning couple recall first connecting by seeing each other through windows from across the street in opposing Star bucks.
BTW my favorite annoyance is from the articles comments section:
"the wannabe milfs are the worst. as soon as they walk in the ***** door you know it’s a ***** sugar free vanilla latte…with only, like, 4 drops of vanilla. so you put in the 4 drops and they thank you, but they call you the wrong name. they walk out the door and their not gone for two ***** seconds before they come back in and demand that you remake it because it’s too sweet and they wanted it with soy or skim milk or some *****"- humperdeath, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4That was the movie 'Best in Show' Another of my fave's.
- greenwald, on 05/22/2008, -0/+11This is similar to the great bit in the movie Dogshow where the neurotic suburban dog owning couple recall first connecting by seeing each other through windows from across the street in opposing Star bucks.
- zardoz73, on 05/23/2008, -0/+4In Crown Hill in Seattle, there are two Starbucks shops within about 75 feet of each other on the SAME BLOCK.
- Khast, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Anacortes, WA is the same, there is a Starbucks in the Food Pavillion, and walk outside, and BOOM there is another Starbucks, across the street from the exit.
- UGM2099, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1If you stand on Canal & Broadway in NYC you can see 3 Starbucks (10, 3 and 7 o'clock, respectively)
- yyshah102, on 05/23/2008, -0/+0The mall in my town has three Starbucks shops. I think there's a point in the middle of the mall where you can see all three.
- doogly, on 05/22/2008, -0/+53http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29030
- jazzgator, on 05/22/2008, -43/+93If I wanted a ***** coffee I'd make it myself. Screw you, Starbucks. I hate you and your grinds.
- dillhole, on 05/22/2008, -1/+45That's true, but if you made it yourself then you wouldn't be throwing money down the drain so you wouldn't be getting the complete experience.
- DarkDx, on 05/22/2008, -2/+3Win.,
- zdiddy85, on 05/22/2008, -1/+1What?,
- dillhole, on 05/29/2008, -0/+1I think I won a comma.
- DarkDx, on 05/22/2008, -2/+3Win.,
- nem0, on 05/22/2008, -12/+32Fact is, Starbucks makes a good, consistent cup of joe. There is a locally-owned coffee shop near the Starbucks I frequent. I go there occassionally and order a cup of plain, black columbian, but I never know what I'll get. Sometimes it might be brewed or stored in a carafe that held Irish Mist or some other flavored coffee. Or it might be 4 hours old. It often has some funky aftertaste. With Starbucks, I know whatever I order will taste like coffee. If a local joint wants to compete with Starbucks, all they need to do is make a decent cup of coffee.
- voyvf, on 05/22/2008, -0/+10It's consistent, but I wouldn't call it good.
I know that it's a matter of personal taste, but their coffee just isn't impressive enough for me to be able to justify the price.
Burger King's Turbo coffee tastes just as bad, but for half the cost. If I'm going to drink swill, I might as well save a few bucks. - Futurejunior, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3Their coffee its self isn't very good, but they have the half caf soy latte double espresso shot with chi ***** down pretty good, that's where the real money is made.
- dopplerdog, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1"I go there occassionally and order a cup of plain, black columbian, but I never know what I'll get."
You'll probably get a cup of plain, black ColOmbian.
- voyvf, on 05/22/2008, -0/+10It's consistent, but I wouldn't call it good.
- jjustice, on 05/22/2008, -8/+17Complain all you want, but I (for one) don't like coffee - I only like specialty drinks. And I don't have time to make it myself. So, if somewhere can do that cheaper that Starbucks, I'll go there. Otherwise, I'll go to Starbucks. It's called capitalism. And disposable income, at least until gas prices go up some more.
- derek20cali, on 05/22/2008, -0/+9You're #3.
- hansblix, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3If you bought the ingredients beforehand then you would save more time, and money, by not having to drive to Starbucks. I'm sure after a few tries you'll be just as fast at making it as the starbucks employees.
- Rabiki, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7I think coffee smells better than it taste....but I'm a drinker too.
- tyywebb, on 05/22/2008, -0/+10Goddamn, it is so ***** cool to hate Starbucks...
- dopplerdog, on 05/23/2008, -0/+2That's because it's ***** cool to hate things that SUCK.
Starbucks coffee is NOT a good cup of coffee. It may be good coffee compared to what you may get at a 7/11, but it's damn awful coffee compared to what you can get from a good barista.
1. They overroast their beans, leaving them bitter.
2. They do not foam their milk freshly every time - most times they have a big jug of foamed milk they made up 5 minutes ago.
3. Their foam ends up like dishwashing liquid.
There are other problems, but these are partially the customer's fault:
1. The "flavours" they add do nothing for the coffee (yet people buy them, go figure) Perhaps it's to mask their over-roasted beans.
2. The sizes are ridiculous: a large cappuccino tastes terrible by the time you get to the end (yet people still buy gallon-sized cappuccinos: go figure).
- dopplerdog, on 05/23/2008, -0/+2That's because it's ***** cool to hate things that SUCK.
- Synyk, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2*receives mug, sips* ....***** THING SUCKS!!!
- PPCG4, on 05/23/2008, -1/+2Funny, but I'm still digging you down.
- dillhole, on 05/22/2008, -1/+45That's true, but if you made it yourself then you wouldn't be throwing money down the drain so you wouldn't be getting the complete experience.
- csanz, on 05/22/2008, -8/+81too funny! i think the 1st one is super annoying... I always say small or medium...
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -2/+32If someone is too stupid to figure out "small" when I order one, I'll to to the next available coffee pot. It's not like they're hard to find.
I'm not going to learn a new language to get my magic bean juice. - Joomal, on 05/22/2008, -0/+15Yes, I say "Medium regular" all the time and they look at me like I'm a ***** alien.
- jumico, on 05/22/2008, -4/+3Drop the regular. Do you also say big large and small tiny.
- tyywebb, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4I think he means regular, as in not decaff.
- MikeXpop, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Regular means "one cream, one sugar", at least at Dunkin Donuts.
- jumico, on 05/22/2008, -4/+3Drop the regular. Do you also say big large and small tiny.
- greenwald, on 05/22/2008, -4/+11You folks have it right. As soon as you start saying Venti and other corp speak, they own you and it's downhill to subservience the machine from there.
- hansblix, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5No, it's simply a matter of Starbucks going against people's expectations. When you think of a drink size you want do you generally think of it as a small, medium, or large? Or a tall, grande, or venti? People say the name of the size they expect it to be. Not many people look at the menu and think "Ok, now what words do they use for small, medium, and large?" So it is a valid complaint that people have because they order the way they are used to at every other place and when they do, they are treated rudely for it by the employee.
Greenwald, you fail sir.
- hansblix, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5No, it's simply a matter of Starbucks going against people's expectations. When you think of a drink size you want do you generally think of it as a small, medium, or large? Or a tall, grande, or venti? People say the name of the size they expect it to be. Not many people look at the menu and think "Ok, now what words do they use for small, medium, and large?" So it is a valid complaint that people have because they order the way they are used to at every other place and when they do, they are treated rudely for it by the employee.
- bob10marley, on 05/22/2008, -4/+3yeah I know, it reminds me of this guy
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ULgwbvj768E- sonicjosh, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1Gold!
- Niten, on 05/22/2008, -0/+9"L... a... r... g... e..."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3zYOGNP92M - eljefe949, on 05/22/2008, -2/+3I militantly refuse to use their size jargon as well.
Liter is french for give me some ***** cola!- ashfish, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Dugg for Super Troopers. Rock.
- Monkeywithacold, on 05/22/2008, -2/+7You guys know Starbucks didn't exactly make up the names...
The sizes they offer are how you would traditionally order espresso.- amida, on 05/23/2008, -1/+1What about "single" and "double"? That's how most non-Starbuck's places do it.
- ashfish, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3Well, when ordering just espresso shots they use the Italian quantifying terms "solo" and "doppio." When adding extra shots to your mixed drink its normally a "double, triple, quad," etc. kind of verbiage.
- amida, on 05/23/2008, -1/+1What about "single" and "double"? That's how most non-Starbuck's places do it.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -2/+32If someone is too stupid to figure out "small" when I order one, I'll to to the next available coffee pot. It's not like they're hard to find.
- diana1234, on 05/22/2008, -17/+31It's funny cause it's true!
- zantos420, on 05/22/2008, -2/+33i used to work at a starbucks and this list is pretty accurate... they forgot the people who wait at the door at 4:55am for the doors to open at 5am and get pissy if we'd open 5 minutes late. sometimes i would just go extra slow to piss them off :)
- michaelb1, on 05/22/2008, -0/+26That was you!
- formido, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2Wow, you're kind of a jerk. How could you tell they were pissy before you started going extra slow to piss them off? Sometimes I get to an place a few minutes before they open, and I simply wait patiently. It's nice to know that when the employees inside aren't opening up on time, they're doing it just because they're assholes.
- zantos420, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1they're called regulars, and they are there same time every day and they have the same cranky attitudes with them.
- chewties, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1i'll just have to take it as fact.
- connormcmenamin, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1it's very true and the pictures couldn't fit more perfectly
- zantos420, on 05/22/2008, -2/+33i used to work at a starbucks and this list is pretty accurate... they forgot the people who wait at the door at 4:55am for the doors to open at 5am and get pissy if we'd open 5 minutes late. sometimes i would just go extra slow to piss them off :)
- sjbdallas, on 05/22/2008, -10/+138How about the douche on number 4? Just seeing his picture makes me want to kill.
- duncewalin, on 05/22/2008, -19/+1Don't hate on #4 just cause he has a much higher chance than you to score those hot chicks on the corner of the page. I hate jealous people and the people who digg them up.
- IDIGTHEDIGG, on 05/22/2008, -0/+16He reminds me of this douche
http://www.whirljack.net/jeremybrooks/2008/05/06/i ...- mrgreenjeans, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3"Douche" is my favorite word of late. I like to draw it out like the Busch beer ads of old.
Dooouchhhe.
- mrgreenjeans, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3"Douche" is my favorite word of late. I like to draw it out like the Busch beer ads of old.
- Condemned, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4He looks like Jim Rome, the biggest douche in the universe (not a South Park reference, he really is).
- charlieville, on 05/22/2008, -15/+107I go to starbucks every day and I have to say that list was amazing. Well done
- insonh, on 05/22/2008, -6/+113which annoying person are you?
- PubStomp, on 05/22/2008, -0/+17clearly he is number 5. you can tell from the tone of the sentence.
- nevinl, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1#2...only because our damn college library sucks...I guess they don't think that people have to study on Sunday anytime before 2pm...
...and good luck for any other commuting student in our area to find a place to study...(too far to go to each other's home)
- Crosshare, on 05/22/2008, -6/+23OMG, like so amazing.
- bbardlbradd, on 05/22/2008, -15/+3^ Obama Supporter's Comment ^
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -24/+9Which one on the list are you?
- fas2, on 05/22/2008, -5/+4Why is this buried and the exact same comment above dugg?
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -6/+13I have a personal bury-brigade. I'm used to it.
- beatleman, on 05/22/2008, -1/+13Didn't you answer your own question? Would would people digg up the same comment made 3 minutes later?
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -12/+2I made the post 2 minutes before the one above.
------
And LOL! The bury-brigade is following dutifully. As you see from the above tagged comment.
As I said, I'm used to it. - uruururr, on 05/22/2008, -1/+9you made it 3 minutes after.
- beatleman, on 05/22/2008, -5/+4I see. The times show you commented first, but for some reason insonh's comment is 2 above yours. People probably just digg up the one on top. But if you really do have a personal bury-brigade, sorry to hear it! And at least you didn't make a typo like my last comment (would would?).
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -9/+1Bleh. Uruururr. You're right. But hey, it's dyslexic to be ok.
But yeah, beatleman. Dig thru my stuff, follow the topics, and you'll see why I make so many people mad.
As I said, I'm used to it. - fas2, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2I might not digg up the same comment made earlier, but at least I would not bury it.
- Diderotten, on 05/22/2008, -3/+4Insonh's was 3 hours and 13 minutes ago.
Bjornski's was 3 hours and 10 minutes ago. 3 minutes after. - bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -3/+2@Diderotten
I already acknowledged that (according to my last message, 3 hours and 4 minutes ago)
But thanks for pointing it out again!
- fas2, on 05/22/2008, -5/+4Why is this buried and the exact same comment above dugg?
- patik, on 05/22/2008, -1/+14Dr.Cox: "Let me go ahead and share a little something special with you that I like to call Perry's perspective: one, if someone is standing in front of me in line at the coffee shop and can't decide what they want in the half hour it took to get to the register then I should be allowed to kill them. ..."
- kmiller2087, on 05/22/2008, -3/+3dugg for scrubs reference
- insonh, on 05/22/2008, -6/+113which annoying person are you?
- dha07030, on 05/22/2008, -23/+17This article is right and their coffee tastes like bitter piss and yet they still sell a ***** load of it.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -5/+13That's because it's been ingrained to be "cool" to pay $5 for a cup of coffee now.
"Your bean juice didn't come in this designer cup? You drink *****!"- musicbear, on 05/22/2008, -3/+6$5 for a coffee? At Starbucks? Wow. You can't read the sign and you'll pay whatever you're told to... wow.
- derek20cali, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2You're both #3.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3I don't drink that overpriced bean-water.
I make my own for about $.20 a pot. I have no problem carrying a thermos. It's not any more inconvenient than a cardboard cup which is easily crushed and spilled.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -5/+13That's because it's been ingrained to be "cool" to pay $5 for a cup of coffee now.
- nancyargent, on 05/22/2008, -17/+4Right on!
- diggopolous, on 05/22/2008, -5/+1Right on!
- chuckDontSurf, on 05/22/2008, -4/+4Can you digg it?
- TonyLocNE, on 05/22/2008, -1/+1Warriors... Come out to plaAAYYY.
- kidfinesse, on 05/22/2008, -21/+120How about the coffee makers with the pretentious names like "barista" who never offer you a sleeve for your coffee because they want to protect the environment. I hate them.
- Bilabrin, on 05/22/2008, -4/+19You need a sleeve to hold a cup?
- byronm, on 05/22/2008, -1/+39Funny.. he requires a "Sleeve" to hold a cup of joe yet conceives of a "barista" as pretentious.
- celotil, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4The first time I was in Brisbane and talking to someone about a coffee shop I'd just been to for breakfast, they corrected my phrase, "dude making coffee all morning", to barista, but I, never hearing that term before AND working at an ISP on the same floor as a law firm, thought they meant Barrister.
The rest of the conversation was rather weird and confusing from that point.
- celotil, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4The first time I was in Brisbane and talking to someone about a coffee shop I'd just been to for breakfast, they corrected my phrase, "dude making coffee all morning", to barista, but I, never hearing that term before AND working at an ISP on the same floor as a law firm, thought they meant Barrister.
- jtorkbob, on 05/22/2008, -3/+11A 'coffee maker' is a machine. 'Barista' is a perfectly reasonable noun for a person who makes coffee, with fewer syllables.
- mrgreenjeans, on 05/22/2008, -0/+8Funny. I used to work at ***** years ago before the sleeves. The sleeves were introduced to reduce waste as each drink was served with TWO cups.
- dopplerdog, on 05/23/2008, -0/+4Barista is the proper name for someone that makes coffee, get used to it. It's common usage, just because you're not familiar with the term doesn't make it pretentious.
- crushallcakes, on 05/22/2008, -7/+121I would add the people who buy those terrible, pre-packaged sandwiches to the list. It's as if they're saying, "I'm willing to pay a lot and deal with douches to get tasty coffee, but I'm willing to eat a sandwich that's on par with an old-ass Lunchable."
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -6/+8Do you hate McDonalds too?
- Aensland, on 05/22/2008, -2/+22McDonalds has always been the poster child for mediocre food.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -3/+23You called it "food".
You are more kind than I, sir. - jumico, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3Like 10 years ago I swear McDonald's was a lot better.
- bigstinky, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4I for one love McDonald's. The red and the yellow. The delicious orange drink. The best fries in the world. I'm not so foolish as to think that what they serve can be called "food," insofar as you must eat it to take advantage of it's originally intended objective. I look at the Big Mac as meat flavored candy bar. I love them. I understand they are destroying me slowly, but their delicious sloppy goodness has won me over. And no one can tell me different.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -3/+23You called it "food".
- Aensland, on 05/22/2008, -2/+22McDonalds has always been the poster child for mediocre food.
- KingGorilla, on 05/22/2008, -1/+48Hey, don't hate on Lunchables
- myranttoyou, on 05/22/2008, -7/+5They are not as good as Dinnerables.
- KevinRWright, on 05/22/2008, -5/+1Yeah, they had oreos in them sometimes.
- drhead, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4I use to work at starbucks and when people wanted one of those sandwiches I would tell them that they could get a much better taster sandwich at the Coney Island next door. I almost got fired for that. I'm not sure why?
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -1/+5"Eat where the employees eat" has been a good rule to follow.
Considering so few of them eat where they work.... - TVarmy, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Are you kidding? You were dissing one of your company's products. That'd be like saying, "The new Pike Place blend is pretty good, but it's just a pale imitation of Dunkin Donut's kind of medium roast if that's what you like..."
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -1/+5"Eat where the employees eat" has been a good rule to follow.
- Bodhinature, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3Sandwiches? What about those stupid little $8 cheese platters? A slice of old dried out cheddar, stale brie and a half rotten grape. Thanks Starbucks, for lowering standards everywhere, And ***** replacing real espresso machines that require skills with your stupid automated espresso machines. Now, instead of an occasional bad latte from an untrained new employee, the most experienced employee can give the same ***** coffee. You've eliminated the learning curve and turned everyone into monkeys.
- bjornski, on 05/22/2008, -6/+8Do you hate McDonalds too?
- Devil40A, on 05/22/2008, -5/+15Totally true. Love the photo of the d-bag on #4.
- dunbone, on 05/22/2008, -2/+14It's okay, you can say DOUCHE on digg. Digg loves to make fun of douchebags, and rightfully so.
- BXRWXR, on 05/22/2008, -2/+24Thanks for the tip, douchebag.
- dunbone, on 05/22/2008, -18/+3good job asswipe, you've succeeded in making yourself a douchebag, bill. newb
- BXRWXR, on 05/22/2008, -2/+24Thanks for the tip, douchebag.
- electricdragon, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1He looks like Tom Sizemore.
- dunbone, on 05/22/2008, -2/+14It's okay, you can say DOUCHE on digg. Digg loves to make fun of douchebags, and rightfully so.
- Birdoftruth, on 05/22/2008, -11/+201"Therefore, these people go to the busiest Starbucks and pop open their iMac, making sure their screen is clearly displaying a full page of text (or clear screenplay format for those in Los Angeles)."
Damn they lugged the whole thing over there? Never seen that one before- afx1, on 05/22/2008, -0/+85http://improveverywhere.com/2008/02/25/mobile-desk ...
- kitsua, on 05/22/2008, -5/+2I lol'd.
- sreynolds148, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4windows 95 ftw
- ace1220, on 05/22/2008, -1/+10Well, everyone has to see the screen, and no one misses a 20 in. iMac.
- dema, on 05/22/2008, -14/+2The entire article is pretty pathetic, really.
"If you’re lactose intolerant, on a strict diet, and can’t handle a full dose of caffeine, how about instead of ordering a “non-fat, grande, soy chai latte with a half shot of espresso and no foam” and then stand in front of the pick up window and pace like one of Michael Vick’s pitbulls watching Vick pull out the rape stand after losing a fight, you just grab a glass of god damn water and drink that."
Ok.... - Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -6/+2A real writer would NEVER let ANYONE read something that was unfinished.
- cleverdiggname, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3editor perhaps? friends? family?
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -5/+1Only after I have a completed first draft that I'm happy with. Most other writers I know are the same way. Works in progress? Get outta here.
- TonyLocNE, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5@Hangly
I dugg you down for backdoor bragging (30 Rock, anyone?) and also for essentially becoming "iMac writer guy at Starbucks" by announcing to digg that you're a writer. - Hangly, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1I'm not a writer, I'm more of a hack.
I do like writing though, and I concentrate better in public than I do at home. So I drag my giant grimy Gateway piece of ***** laptop with the broken keyboard and missing battery down to the mall coffee shop and bang out a couple pages of crap sometimes.
I don't look nearly as cool as one might imagine.
- kmiller2087, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3i think you missed that one buddy.
they dont want you to read it, they want you to know they're writers - ElbowGeek, on 05/22/2008, -0/+0Ah, but remember, we're not talking about a *real* writer, but a dedicated wannabe ;-)
- cleverdiggname, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3editor perhaps? friends? family?
- Smoo930, on 05/22/2008, -1/+9I read that section and instantly thought Family Guy. So I had to track it down.
http://www.devilducky.com/media/58992/ - electricdragon, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4You should totally write that down.
Ok, will you watch me? - clayeaston, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3and i think that's how this article was written
- aduzik, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1When I was in college, there was a guy who would haul his 20" Gateway LCD -- box and all -- to the local Panera and hook it up to his laptop. So I actually can imagine someone bringing their iMac to Starbucks.
- afx1, on 05/22/2008, -0/+85http://improveverywhere.com/2008/02/25/mobile-desk ...
- omnithought, on 05/22/2008, -3/+22The subtitle of the submission said it all: "Starbucks employees and customers."
- sandersdamnit, on 05/22/2008, -10/+37double soy chai half shot of espresso caramel mocha frappucino - $11.50
"But if I ask you for a small, don’t act like I’m speaking to you in that Native American langauge we used in World War II to deliver coded messages. You’re familiar with the sizes small, medium and large, and if you’re not, then you might want to change underwear because there’s a good chance there’s a sizeable amount of ***** in them due to your inability to grasp the concept of wiping your ***** after defecating" - priceless- serif69, on 05/22/2008, -0/+11You just ordered 3 drinks. $11.50 is a bargain.
- tehnico, on 05/22/2008, -4/+5Three smalls at Tim Hortons... $3.70
Three smalls at home... $0.25
Not being a pretentious douche bag that needs to be seen going to starbucks, and to spend as much on coffee as they possibly can... Priceless.- serif69, on 05/22/2008, -0/+8Are priceless jokes still popular in Canada?
- Teej, on 05/22/2008, -6/+2Tim Hortons is brown water, no taste at all.
- saintamour, on 05/22/2008, -1/+5Technically, coffee is brown water....digg me down :(
- Acglaphotis, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2im gonna digg you up just to spite you.
- tehnico, on 05/22/2008, -4/+5Three smalls at Tim Hortons... $3.70
- riskybeats, on 05/22/2008, -0/+14So you got a double (which means double espresso), with a half shot of espresso (???), then soy milk and chai sauce mixed into a caramel mocha frappuchino? I think they put on a surcharge for having to make such a stupid drink.
- zaco, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7we do.
- zaco, on 05/22/2008, -2/+7we do
- zaco, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7we do.
- seeyounorth, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1They should have added to the list- the person that feels proud to order some complicated coffee as if it makes them seem more interesting....and then feels the need to post it on digg!
- sandersdamnit, on 05/22/2008, -2/+1i've never ***** ordered coffee from there and i don't care to.
- rambovsthailand, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1Yeah, screw those people who enjoy having a drink made the way they like it! What jerks.
- serif69, on 05/22/2008, -0/+11You just ordered 3 drinks. $11.50 is a bargain.
- Oxygen, on 05/22/2008, -20/+258Burried as Inaccurate - Everyone you meet inside a Starbucks is annoying.
- Snaieke, on 05/22/2008, -5/+11Jinx! I was signing in to write that.
- antlerboy, on 05/22/2008, -2/+9if you were inside, wouldn't that make you annoying too...?
- djdole, on 05/22/2008, -1/+16And that would make you a #3;
"The Guy Who Hates Starbucks But Goes There Every Day".
- djdole, on 05/22/2008, -1/+16And that would make you a #3;
- Oxygen, on 05/22/2008, -3/+9I am annoying.
- faceless323, on 05/22/2008, -2/+5annoying guy is annoying
- t0x2c, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1And since when does "Peruse" mean "Pretend to read"
- zaren, on 05/22/2008, -10/+32Solution? Don't go to Starbucks. Works wonders for me. I've been in a Starbucks twice in my life, and neither time was to buy overpriced ground wet beans. I take my caffiene cold and yellow, thankyouverymuch.
- afx1, on 05/22/2008, -1/+16ew...gimme some crab juice
- chanop, on 05/22/2008, -1/+5GAGALASH!
- DrummerAndrew, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4Kloukalash.
- cojerk, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1No bowl. Stick.
- norbiu, on 05/22/2008, -2/+14So, what you're saying is that you drink your own urine?
- dawnlikethesoap, on 05/22/2008, -5/+3urine is not cold, dingus.
- Arcesius, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4served with a few ice cubes it is.
- dawnlikethesoap, on 05/22/2008, -5/+3urine is not cold, dingus.
- jjpertusch, on 05/22/2008, -2/+50the elitest mountain dew drinker? this is awesome.
- WomensUnderwear, on 05/22/2008, -2/+13elitist
- jjpertusch, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4aw man.
- zaren, on 05/22/2008, -4/+6More of an anti-elite elitist (and I rarely drink the stuff anymore, it's bad for my stomach), but seriously...
Who in their right mind pays $4 for a single cup of coffee, when that $4 will buy a 12-pack of Dew and leave you with change? Coffee is ground up beans soaked in hot water, but Dew is caffinated carbonated *orange juice*! The very nectar of the gods!- jjpertusch, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3oh, im not disagreeing. and with this sound reasoning i dont see how anyone could.
on a side note, whatever happened to those do the dew commercials? - voyvf, on 05/22/2008, -0/+9If you think that crap is orange juice, I have a bridge to sell you.
- mbonnin, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5What the ***** is *juice*? I want some orange drink!
- jjpertusch, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3oh, im not disagreeing. and with this sound reasoning i dont see how anyone could.
- Trichomonas, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3Try pills. 100 pills for about $8 (Canadian). 100mg per pill vs. 90 mg in a small regular coffee. The pills also work faster and don't require any time to consume. Plus you can always break one and know approximately how long it'll work for.
Plus if you still go to university you'll be "the man" because people will always want them. - psykiv, on 05/23/2008, -1/+1Caffeine pills are best. I'm addicted to them now. You can get 60 no doz at walmart for like $8. 200mg of caffeine each.
Just pop two of them whenever you're tired and you're good to go.
Or you could just drink 8 cans of mountain dew or five red bulls for the same effect.- ZeroIce, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3I don't think you have any sperm left....
- psykiv, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1That would be sweet. I definitely won't be getting anyone preggo soon. Oh wait...
- CZzyzx41, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Were formerly the marketing director for Total Breakfast Cereal?
- ZeroIce, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3I don't think you have any sperm left....
- ExSlashdotter, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1A digger after my own heart.
I've since graduated to energy drinks though (mainly rockstar and monster). Still cold and yellow though. - bradproctor, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Interesting you said wet beans.... not something Starbucks is known for since they over-roast their beans to help increase shelf-life which in turn makes their coffees extremely bitter. A darker roast that is not over-roasted will have a shiny oily wet look to the bean.
- afx1, on 05/22/2008, -1/+16ew...gimme some crab juice
- ihazstatus, on 05/22/2008, -10/+5All that for a three dollar cup of Joe. It's no wonder their stock is in the tank.
- iamnobody8614, on 05/22/2008, -0/+10A regular cup of coffee doesn't cost three dollars, it's around half that depending on where the store is located. I go there because I like the coffee and the service is awesome. There are annoying people everywhere you go, the world is full of them. A specific list could be made for about anywhere you would want to go, it's just that Starbucks is very popular and everyone knows it makes you cool and edgy to be against such things.
- voyvf, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Disliking something that's popular doesn't make you cool or edgy. It simply means you can form your own opinion of things.
Though some might go out of their way to hate on anything that's popular. In such a case, they're not cool or edgy either - they're just a douchebag. Or a wannabe-douchebag. Either way, it's not good.
- voyvf, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Disliking something that's popular doesn't make you cool or edgy. It simply means you can form your own opinion of things.
- iamnobody8614, on 05/22/2008, -0/+10A regular cup of coffee doesn't cost three dollars, it's around half that depending on where the store is located. I go there because I like the coffee and the service is awesome. There are annoying people everywhere you go, the world is full of them. A specific list could be made for about anywhere you would want to go, it's just that Starbucks is very popular and everyone knows it makes you cool and edgy to be against such things.
- evo8ftw, on 05/22/2008, -11/+6#9 digg users.
- soulonfire928, on 05/22/2008, -4/+137Greatest thing I've heard about Starbucks...
"...and if you walk to the end of the block, there sits a Starbucks. And directly across the street -- in the exact same building as that Starbucks -- there is... another Starbucks. There is a Starbucks across the street from a Starbucks! And ladies and gentlemen, THAT is the end of the universe." - Lewis Black- bxblox, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5Ive seen a starbucks next to a target that had a starbucks inside... whos idea was that??
- subliminalurge, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1The mall down the street from me has the same thing. Standalone Starbucks built in the parking lot, then about a 20 second walk away, right inside the front door of Target, is another Starbucks.
- lisaawesome, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1I love the Starbucks situation around the college here. There's one inside the main university center, maybe a quarter of a mile to the east of the uni center there is another Starbucks, and then directly across the street there is a Target with yet another Starbucks. Then in case those 3 aren't enough to the south of that Target there is a larger Starbucks. With the exception of the one inside the uni center these were all built within the past few years. I cannot believe there are enough people visiting these damn places to need 4 of them within 1 square mile.
- frelk, on 05/22/2008, -2/+10how can it be across the street and in the same building?
- crossmr, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4Some buildings are built as a single piece which span a road.
- frelk, on 05/22/2008, -4/+1In New York? Which building besides Hunter College? I'm assuming he's talking about the two Starbucks right across from each other in Cooper Sq...
- crossmr, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3I'm looking.. I don't see any mention of new york. I've been in plenty of cities which have malls which span roads where the cars drive underneath, in fact we have a series of 4 malls connected on the 2nd, 3rd and 4th floor in my city where it is seamlessly 1 building and plenty of streets in between them.
There are 3 starbucks in those 4 buildings. - frelk, on 05/22/2008, -3/+2This may surprise you, but Lewis Black is a life-long New Yorker. But maybe he's talking about your local mall.
- crossmr, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2So just because he's from new york, he's probably never gone anywhere else and couldn't possibly be talking about anywhere else? or even a hypothetical building which existed only for the necessity of his bit?
- CoolBluReason, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2when lewis black said this, he meant that the two starbucks were in identical buildings. He also said he was in houston when this happened.
- moocow1452, on 05/23/2008, -0/+2You've gotta think in Portals.
- crossmr, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4Some buildings are built as a single piece which span a road.
- drakethegreat, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Ya thats already happened in downtown Seattle and sadly every one of them is usually busy.
- ChromaVita, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1In the strip mall complex here we have a starbucks in the target, a starbucks in the barnes & noble, and a standalone starbucks. It's a bit ridiculous...
- billbugger, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1or the shrek reference where the giant gingerbread man steps on a starbucks and the people run out, across the street and into another starbucks.
- loudawgucr, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1+1 for recognizing a great comedian :-)
- bxblox, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5Ive seen a starbucks next to a target that had a starbucks inside... whos idea was that??
- adokimus, on 05/22/2008, -5/+24This story would have been a lot shorter and to the point if you clicked on the link and it just said: "douche bags"
That said, I was hoping for something funnier.- SaxWan, on 05/23/2008, -1/+0i agree, the author tried too hard on this one.
- unheralded, on 05/22/2008, -5/+37Iced Chai, no ice...
get outta my face with that- DomoDigital, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1dugg for "gett outta my face with that" awesome
- DomoDigital, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1dugg for "gett outta my face with that" awesome
- eigenweasel, on 05/22/2008, -8/+4What the title should make clear is that there are *only* 8 types of people you will find inside Starbucks.
- lyderaly, on 05/22/2008, -3/+14whats up with that bootleg DVD cover....the actor's names are all jacked up. Clearly I suffer from symptoms of number #1
- jankind, on 05/22/2008, -3/+1If you are referring to the order...Movie posters and art always
list the actors left to right in order of top billing, regardless of their placement in the photo.- cdahlkvist, on 05/22/2008, -2/+1So you are #6 or #1?
- ShrimpCrackers, on 05/23/2008, -0/+2I didn't even know Starbucks had a DVD section!
- catwoman2970, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1The damn kid on the cover is probably 12 and has bigger boobs than me. Bitch.
- jankind, on 05/22/2008, -3/+1If you are referring to the order...Movie posters and art always
- delrin500, on 05/22/2008, -10/+44Tim Horton's kicks the crap out of Starbucks!
- Mier, on 05/22/2008, -6/+13what the ***** is a Tim Horton's?
- getbusyliving, on 05/22/2008, -1/+12Its a Canadian thing. lol.
- dorkino, on 05/22/2008, -1/+34Horton hears an "eh"
- LOCK3D, on 05/22/2008, -2/+6Tim Horton's is not even Canadian owned anymore. It's owned by Wendy's. "Timothy's World Coffee" is still Canadian and has great coffee that comes in sizes "small", "medium", and "large". Starbucks is overpriced, pretentious, burnt tasting crap. Their roasts seem to only range from "charred" to "nothing but ashes". Am I the only one that likes a mild roast? Mild roast coffee has way more caffeine and a nice toasted flavour. Some starbucks automaton once told me that "mild roasted coffee is not how coffee is supposed to taste". It was then that I decided to never buy anything from Starbucks ever again. Who the ***** are they to tell me that my coffee should taste like burnt garbage?
/end rant - bitterscream, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5They are no longer owned by Wendy's
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_Hortons#Merger_wi ...
Under pressure from rival restaurateur Nelson Pelz, in late 2005, Wendy's announced it would sell between 15% and 18% of the Tim Hortons operations in an initial public offering, which was completed on March 24, 2006, and subsequently said it would spin off to shareholders its remaining interest by the end of 2006.
- getbusyliving, on 05/22/2008, -1/+12Its a Canadian thing. lol.
- akilleen, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3I like Tim Horton's, but it seems that their sizes are smaller than normal. A small is like extremely small. Still, can't beat their hot apple cider.
- xtremesniper, on 05/22/2008, -5/+6I will get dugg down for this, but honest to god I can't believe people are STILL so loyal to Tim Horton's! You don't know what coffee tastes like if you drink Tim Horton's coffee. Try a real brew and then try to love Tim Horton's again.
And for the record, a "real" brew can be many things, including but not limited to grinding and brewing your own coffee. Just, anything except these "fast food" coffee shops.- thedak, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2$5 for a ***** coffee in a starbucks/cafe, $1.47 for a coffee that takes me 2 minutes to get and I can go back to coding... hm.. I'll take my tim's. It may not be the most amazing coffee in the world, but seriously, < $1.50 for a large. I'm glad you're loaded, but as a computer science student I'll take my damn timmy's thank you.
- xtremesniper, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3I understand your point, but let's be realistic. It's not $5 for a coffee at a specialty shop. Even when I get a "fancy" latte it only amounts to $3.50, so let's not get carried away here.
If you're addicted to coffee and you'll drink a few cups a day then I can see why saving a little bit of money will add up in the long run. But if you're like me and only drink coffee maybe 3 times a week, then it's not worth the savings at all.
- xtremesniper, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3I understand your point, but let's be realistic. It's not $5 for a coffee at a specialty shop. Even when I get a "fancy" latte it only amounts to $3.50, so let's not get carried away here.
- DomoDigital, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2no its not the best, but theres something about it...
I prefer my own..but once in a while its like a treat or something.
- thedak, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2$5 for a ***** coffee in a starbucks/cafe, $1.47 for a coffee that takes me 2 minutes to get and I can go back to coding... hm.. I'll take my tim's. It may not be the most amazing coffee in the world, but seriously, < $1.50 for a large. I'm glad you're loaded, but as a computer science student I'll take my damn timmy's thank you.
- uruururr, on 05/22/2008, -7/+2i will never understand tim hortons. it always has lines but it is just about the worst food and drink i've ever seen in my life. my working theory is that canadians are ridiculously nationalistic, and so are fervently loyal and enthusiastic about all things canadian... even if they are ***** or mediocre at best (eg, great canadian superstore, molson respectively).
have a croissant at tim hortons and be amazed that it can even be considered edible (canada is a french colony).- xtremesniper, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Canada is a french colony? I was agreeing with your post until there. The most you can say is Quebec was a french colony, because the rest of Canada was British.
- jalaram, on 05/22/2008, -2/+3Second Cup > Timothy's > Starbucks > McDonalds > Tim Hortons > Dunkin Donuts.
Peets and Joffreys are about at the level of Timothy's- sonicjosh, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2You putting McDonalds above Tim Hortons!?!? What is wrong with you (try a cafe mocha).
- Trichomonas, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Try French Vanilla...I can't drink the regular stuff at Tim Hortons but for the price I'll take the French Vanilla over Starbucks any day.
- riyehn, on 05/23/2008, -1/+2I'm with him. Tim Hortons coffee is actually worse than McDonald's coffee (which isn't that bad for a fast food chain).
- psylemon, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1I agree that Second Cup ***** rocks
- xtremesniper, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1I would agree with your hierarchy except I would put Timothy's above Second Cup... But that's just my opinion, and it doesn't matter because they're almost the same anyways.
I believe that McDonalds is better than Tim Hortons as well, but not because I've tried McDonalds coffee, but because I've been hearing all across the US how hard McD's has been pushing into the coffee market. Lots of praise down there.
- Mier, on 05/22/2008, -6/+13what the ***** is a Tim Horton's?
- greggsandler, on 05/22/2008, -9/+0I sold my soul to work at Starbucks.
- MixMastaKooz, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3Actually, I do give props to Starbucks for treating their employees well. I know several people who work for them, and they're very happy there.
- Exbzurq, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2They are happy because with all the coffee in the place there are small amounts of sugar and caffeine in the air that get inhaled and cause them to be on a sugar caffeine rush all day.
That or they are really just douches and you don't know it.
I should have ended my comment earlier. I've got nothing else to contribute.
I'm so lonely...
- Exbzurq, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2They are happy because with all the coffee in the place there are small amounts of sugar and caffeine in the air that get inhaled and cause them to be on a sugar caffeine rush all day.
- MixMastaKooz, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3Actually, I do give props to Starbucks for treating their employees well. I know several people who work for them, and they're very happy there.
- Nrvana423, on 05/22/2008, -3/+79I want to read this article so bad....but it is blocked at work. I like their coffee personally, and I even worked at Starbucks for a brief stint, but I found one thing stands true; the longer the drink name the bigger the ass hole.
- mediaspree, on 05/22/2008, -0/+30what sys admin thought to block holytaco.com and not digg?
- Nrvana423, on 05/22/2008, -0/+14Sys admins that go to digg on a regular basis I suppose hehe. I don't understand the logic, but I am thankful for it.
- Hotrox, on 05/22/2008, -1/+3There's a good chance your company uses a commercial site blocker (essentially, a third party listing of sites to block). I present to you the cancer of workplace browsing - Smartfilter http://www.securecomputing.com/index.cfm?skey=85
- StormTroopr, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Hey, I found the cure for cancer.
http://www.torproject.org/
- Nrvana423, on 05/22/2008, -0/+14Sys admins that go to digg on a regular basis I suppose hehe. I don't understand the logic, but I am thankful for it.
- imacommi, on 05/22/2008, -5/+668. Manager Who Refuses to Recognize the Words Small, Medium, and Large
I understand, you’re a corporate guy and thus must abide by company policies by calling the different sizes by their Starbucks Christian names of Venti, Grande, etc…. But if I ask you for a small, don’t act like I’m speaking to you in that Native American langauge we used in World War II to deliver coded messages. You’re familiar with the sizes small, medium and large, and if you’re not, then you might want to change underwear because there’s a good chance there’s a sizeable amount of ***** in them due to your inability to grasp the concept of wiping your ***** after defecating.
7. Intern Who is Buying for the Entire Office
Wearing an all-white or striped button down shirt, this guy shows up with a legal pad full of hastily scribbled orders. “Yeah, I’m gonna need 24 tall skinny soy lattes with sugar free hazelnut extra hot…and 32 grande no caff cappuccinos with light whip cream, sugar free hazelnut and vanilla with white chocolate mocha. And 14 grande supremos with a triple shot, sugar free vanilla, extra white mocha, no whip, no foam and an extra drizzle. Oh, and can I get a smiley face on the bottom of all those?” And he knows if one of these orders is screwed up, it’s going to cost him a chance at the a full-time gig as assistant editor where he can bring coffee to even more important people. So instead of just grabbing his bags and leaving, he inspects all 70-odd cups in his 17 flimsy cardboard holders. If you get behind this guy, you may as well give up any hopes of getting a cup of joe in your lifetime. You’re better off flying to Columbia, slitting Juan Valdez’s throat and stealing his coffee-harvesting burro.
6. The Writer Who Wants You to Know They’re a Writer
Being a writer is a pretty cool occupation, but unfortunately you can’t tell someone’s a writer just by looking at them. And having to tell someone you’re a writer is way less impressive. Therefore, these people go to the busiest Starbucks and pop open their iMac, making sure their screen is clearly displaying a full page of text (or clear screenplay format for those in Los Angeles). Their next step is to make sure they’re facing away from where everyone goes to pick up their drinks while staring at the screen while remembering to take deep breaths which will indicate to others that deep and creative thought that normal minds are not capable of, is taking place. Who gives a ***** if an ***** and his mac have spent six hours taking up a table normally reserved for four people, it’s important you know that they’re juggling a complex story about a boy in Alaska who comes of age and befriends a bear. That’s right, they’re creating that using only their minds!
5. Overly Happy Line Greeter/Order Taker
At some point, the Starbucks Corporation realized that their growing legions of employees didn’t have the best people skills. Their answer was to create their own version of the Wal-Mart Greeter who also takes your order. But since they don’t pay *****, you end up having some G.E.D.-havin’ dumbass or an excruciatingly-lonely elderly woman force their brand of corporate chit-chat down your throat. Instead of waiting to pay for your overpriced chai in peace, you have to deal with: “Goooooood morning today! How are you? Some kinda weather we’re having isn’t it? I wish I was outside in the park! Wouldn’t that be nice? It’s sooooo sunny! And what’s better for you than a nice big dose of Mr. Sun! Maybe some coffee? Ha! So, what can we get you today? Need a little pick-me-up? You do! I think we ALL could use one, yes we could! YES WE COULD! Anyway, I’ll get this chai order right up for you. What’s your name? Terry? That’s my cousin’s name! Small world. Yes. It. Is. Small world indeed….Hi! And how are you doing today?!?!”
4. Complicated Order Guy Who Needs his Coffee Right The F*&K Now.
When you order coffee, it shouldn’t sound like you’re giving the pass code to a missile defense system. If you’re lactose intolerant, on a strict diet, and can’t handle a full dose of caffeine, how about instead of ordering a “non-fat, grande, soy chai latte with a half shot of espresso and no foam” and then stand in front of the pick up window and pace like one of Michael Vick’s pitbulls watching Vick pull out the rape stand after losing a fight, you just grab a glass of god damn water and drink that. Last I checked that won’t give you exploding diarrhea or anxiety… unless you’re at the Starbucks in Tijuana.
3. The Guy Who Hates Starbucks But Goes There Every Day
Armed with armchair political rants, this guy is the world’s biggest bore and the world’s biggest hypocrite combined into one big uber-*****. He won’t shut up about how Starbucks is bad for the environment and how they’re taking over the world and how their coffee totally “doesn’t taste like the gourmet stuff downtown.” But when you bring up the fact that he’s ranting about Starbucks while he’s actually inside a Starbucks, his crappy hippie-wannabe excuses just start piling up. “Well, here’s the thing, I just didn’t have time to make it over to my usual coffee place. You know the one way over on 2nd Ave? Yeah, it’s one of the last mom and pop coffee shops in the area. I toooootally love that place. It’s so real. I was on my way over there, but the traffic was a killer, so I was totally forced to get my fix at this place. I mean, the rich get richer, right? That’s the law of the land. I totally can’t stand that I have to come here, but that’s what they do. They tie your hands, man. These big corporations. They just own you. They’re everywhere. Can you hand me one of those Splenda?”
2. Study Groups
Hey, screw the library with all it’s “room” and “group space.” It makes way more sense to go to an incredibly busy and crowded Starbucks with tables that have insufficient space to lay your books. Everyone knows you have a poli-sci midterm, mostly because they can hear every ***** thing you’re saying because you’re yelling so that you can be heard over a frappucino being made. If you could, would you hold a study group session in a Turkish prison? Because Starbucks is basically the same thing, except with less gay sex, and a little bit better coffee.
1. The Person Who Peruses the DVD Section As If They Might Purchase.
It’s really great when you’re waiting in line behind somebody only to realize that they’re not in line, but instead deciding whether or not they want to purchase the “Pursuit of Happyness” DVD. “Gee what’s this movie Pursuit of Happyness about? I didn’t hear of it last summer when it grossed over 100 million dollars. Even though I’ve come here for coffee, I should carefully peruse the back cover to find out more about it!” Also, please don’t pick up a copy of “Akeelah and the Bee” as if you were going to buy it. No one buys that movie. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’s not even a real movie, it was just a box cover created by a group of white Starbucks executives so that customers could hold it in their hands and pretend to read the back, giving the impression to those around them that they’re progressive thinkers who seek out and enjoy films with African American casts. - celotil, on 05/22/2008, -1/+0I haven't been into a Starbucks yet, coming across them when I'm briefly in Brisbane, but I often go to the Coffee Club in Riverlinks or Star Cafe (or Cafe One, or what ever the ***** it's called this week) near the BCC cinema, plus popping into various other coffee shops depending on when I feel like having a coffee.
There's a drink that seems to be universal around SE Queensland, and I dare say any barista around the world would know what you meant after a moment of thought. It is the Mugaccino. It's a cappuccino, in a standard-sized mug instead of a small bowl-like cup.
I drink it the same way my parents do. I take my sugar satchels, and empty them, one by one, on a little pile in the middle of the foam, counting to see how many satchels that foam layer holds - I've gotten up to five once. Then I eat the foam with the teaspoon after the sugar has sunk through, then stir the coffee, and drink it. - Chalks777, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4It was blocked at my workplace too. However, my workplace doesn't block google cached pages, maybe you could try that. I just searched "site:holytaco.com starbucks" and it came up first thing. Also, thanks, imacommi.
- mediaspree, on 05/22/2008, -0/+30what sys admin thought to block holytaco.com and not digg?
- chanop, on 05/22/2008, -11/+5#9 - Digger
- kerguelen72, on 05/22/2008, -4/+51I can add one more:
The woman/girl that has 12 ***** gallons of prefume on - which chokes the ***** out of you while standing in line.- wanderingsun, on 05/22/2008, -6/+8I don't wear perfume because I'm terrified of being "that girl"
- blitz718, on 05/22/2008, -3/+4Why were you in line at a starbucks?
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -1/+9To buy coffee?
- blitz718, on 05/23/2008, -0/+0I was only asking in the spirit of the article
- zaco, on 05/22/2008, -0/+6though this can really happen anywhere.
- krisscofield, on 05/22/2008, -5/+197I worked at two different Starbucks locations, and I can assure you they left out the single most obnoxious "types" that frequent Sbucks (from a barista's point of view): Teenage girls who don't drink coffee, come in packs of at least 4, order several frappacino's, and pay in mostly change. All while talking at the top of their lungs.
- Whadabala, on 05/22/2008, -7/+28Pedobear approves.
- WhiteIce89, on 05/22/2008, -15/+7You worked in Starbucks and you don't know how to spell frappuccino?
- twertyto, on 05/22/2008, -1/+20I'm sure during off peak hours he sits there staring at the menu to make sure he can spell everything correctly.
- buckrogers1965, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1You know how I know you work at starbucks?
- gregish, on 05/22/2008, -1/+8thank you, that was the first thing i thought of
- uziko, on 05/22/2008, -1/+13ahh, teenage girls, that would be my favorite custormers
- Taciturn, on 05/22/2008, -3/+67I once ordered a mocha in a Starbucks and was impatiently asked "what kind?"
- novemberdream07, on 05/22/2008, -4/+13there's regular mocha and white mocha fyi
- thelif, on 05/22/2008, -0/+27racist
- nevinl, on 05/23/2008, -0/+2I would think that anyone with half a brain would realize that if you don't friggin say 'white' mocha, you can just assume 'regular' - isn't that the point of calling it that?
- Quicksilver4648, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3I like the iced Mocha. But then I am always asked "What kind." "A mocha with ice dammit."
- anemptygun, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Do you walk into a mcdonalds and say "uh i'll have a burger."?
- boulderomen, on 07/04/2008, -0/+1are you sure the question was not "What Size?" because I work for Starbucks, and this is the single most frustrating thing, when a customer orders a drink, when in order to begin writing the cup I must know the SIZE OF THE CUP.
fyi, state size first.
- novemberdream07, on 05/22/2008, -4/+13there's regular mocha and white mocha fyi
- geardosdotnet, on 05/22/2008, -7/+20I'd still take all those people over the 100 kinds of jerks you run into in a bar.
- Bilabrin, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7The difference being that when you go to a bar you presumably will be drinking which takes the edge of any kind of annoyance you may feel.
- Nesh, on 05/22/2008, -0/+8Or it heightens it, depending on what type of a drunk you are.
- Ramble, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Depends what kind of bar. Come to a village pub in the Uk and they're just full of the regulars which are all 60+ years old anyway. Go to a crappy bar in the middle of a town and it'll be filled with douchebags.
- Bilabrin, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7The difference being that when you go to a bar you presumably will be drinking which takes the edge of any kind of annoyance you may feel.
- Crosshare, on 05/22/2008, -4/+10I'm guilty of number two on the list, it's not my fault the Cisco networking group wanted to meet there.
- crossmr, on 05/22/2008, -2/+5Not only that, the library doesn't exactly allow a lot of talking in it..
some I believe have some rooms you can book to study as a group in, but a lot don't.
- crossmr, on 05/22/2008, -2/+5Not only that, the library doesn't exactly allow a lot of talking in it..
- sandiegodude, on 05/22/2008, -0/+24There is a corner here in San Diego (Mira Mesa area) where you are literally within 1 block of 4 Starbucks... On Mira Mesa Blvd, there are about 9 or 10 Starbucks, and the road is only about 6 miles long.
... insanity.- ieatsmurfs, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4Don't forget the ones inside Vons and Albertsons
- samuraipizzacat, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1Where I live if you stand exactly at the right spot downtown you can see 5 Starbucks.
- siandt, on 05/22/2008, -0/+0If, in New York, you stood on the corner of 3rd and 8th you used to be able to see three different Starbucks. As in, in a row. Unfortunately (for the bibliophiles) they closed the Barnes and Noble which held one of them, so there are only two now. Still too many.
- SuperFarStucker, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1'Do you think we're competing with ourselves?
No, what you're doing is pretty much eating your own *****.'
RW - firedrillduckie, on 05/22/2008, -1/+1There's one next to Jamba Juice, then inside Barnes and Noble, and then inside Alberstons...
Why would you get Starbucks at Albertsons? - Handonam, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2hm SD mira mesa area. i'd have to drive over and check that out. I'm in the sdsu area, where there's a bunch of cocaine and marijuana dealers in frat houses.
haha
- Blitzwing84, on 05/22/2008, -0/+99Recently at a Starbucks, some guy brought in his Macbook, a full-size keyboard, and a keyboard stand. This was a small shop in the city, so it took up nearly half the store. I can't imagine any reason you would haul all that equipment besides to "show off" that you are a musician and maybe attract some gullible woman. Dude- this isn't your damn recording studio, it's a coffee shop.
- hrhs556x, on 05/22/2008, -0/+43ahh like a electric piano keyboard, had to read that twice
- Intamin, on 05/23/2008, -0/+6Haha, I was like, "Who would have a stand for a computer keyboard? Must've been dvorak..."
- FlyingSpaghetti, on 05/22/2008, -1/+5I would have loved to accidentally drop a large, excuse me, "venti" coffee, on his keyboard!
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -9/+3Ahhh... actually I do that. It's not to show off, it's because I concentrate best in public places.
- Ramble, on 05/22/2008, -0/+16Hello, I'm from the International Douchebag Assignment Commitee. I'm afriad you've been assigned as a douchebag. Your free popped collar, headphones that everyone else can hear and a house in New Jersey will on their way to you shortly.
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -1/+5Sorry, didn't realize it was musical equipment. I mean a regular computer keyboard.
- hrhs556x, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1that's still pretty gay
- Ramble, on 05/22/2008, -0/+16Hello, I'm from the International Douchebag Assignment Commitee. I'm afriad you've been assigned as a douchebag. Your free popped collar, headphones that everyone else can hear and a house in New Jersey will on their way to you shortly.
- rhinitus, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2I remember seeing some funny prank on the internet somewhere (might have been the Improv Everywhere people?) where they brought in desktop computers and CRT monitors. Priceless.
- hrhs556x, on 05/22/2008, -0/+43ahh like a electric piano keyboard, had to read that twice
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -3/+324Most annoying person I ever saw at a Starbucks: the guy behind me who listened to what I ordered, ordered exactly the same thing, then pushed past me to grab the first one that was ready, saving himself about 20 seconds of waiting.
- Hotrox, on 05/22/2008, -1/+160Rofl, sorry but that's awesome.
- sovereign3, on 05/22/2008, -0/+103I at least give him kudos for being clever.
- MixMastaKooz, on 05/22/2008, -2/+71Wow...that's a social hack meets douchecbag move: douchebag hack. There...new slang for everyone.
- mikecc, on 05/22/2008, -9/+3HAHAHAH I AM SO STONED AND THATS THE FUNNIEST ***** IVE EVER HEARD
- Nekiruhs, on 05/23/2008, -1/+3Douchehack?
- system5y, on 05/22/2008, -1/+37pwned!
- Bilabrin, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4Reminds me of the guy who cuts in the drive in line between the pay and recieve order booth and drives off with your food making you have to wait another 2 minutes!
- hukarez, on 05/22/2008, -3/+0By any chance, did they ask for your name to write on the cup?
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -0/+4No. I remember that the reason it worked is because they would just call out the drink when they put it up on the counter. But this happened ten years ago (and I haven't been to a Starbucks in 9 years or so), maybe they did it differently back then.
- tehHardcorez, on 05/22/2008, -1/+42And you just bent over the barrel? For god sakes man, defend your honor!
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5You're right. But by the time I put 2 and 2 together and realized that he had done it on purpose, he had grabbed it and was walking away, and it didn't seem worth chasing after him.
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5It would have been worth it. Now you'll have to go your whole life knowing some ***** got the better of you.
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2Ha...I got over it a long time ago - like an hour after it happened. There's always going to be some ***** pulling some kind of *****. If you let things like that bother you long-term, you only have yourself to blame.
- rrbest, on 05/23/2008, -2/+2Did you get over it? Because seems to me you just made a post ranting about it.
- kh99, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1You need to look up "rant". All I did was tell the story.
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5You're right. But by the time I put 2 and 2 together and realized that he had done it on purpose, he had grabbed it and was walking away, and it didn't seem worth chasing after him.
- stayhumble, on 05/22/2008, -0/+10next time you see that douche, quietly ask the barista to spit in it.
- kevman459, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3Ask the barista to spit in YOURS and see what he does....
- stayhumble, on 05/23/2008, -0/+2yeah, you could ask her real loud to spit in it and give her a wink. If it's a dude though, skip the wink and utilize the nod.
- Viriatus2, on 05/22/2008, -2/+6and you didn't punched him?
- allengeer, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1wow what a good idea.
- Jethdm, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1You should of 'accidentally' spilled your drink on him on the way to your seat.
- norcalscan, on 05/22/2008, -1/+6Wow - smart move. Until you run across someone like me (the internet tough guy) who would probably deliver a good punch.
- nevinl, on 05/23/2008, -1/+1this is still digg, right?
(ala "Cindy Crawford is flat as s**t...I'm better than that...")
- nevinl, on 05/23/2008, -1/+1this is still digg, right?
- Hangly, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3You should have accidentally tackled him and beat him to a bloody pulp.
- redheadguy719, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1my bad, man....didn't mean to....i was just in a hurry to get back to writing my book...
- DownkeyKowng, on 05/22/2008, -8/+3could someone copy and paste? site is blocked at work.
- winmywii, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1See Nrvana423's comment above.
- AnthonyC, on 05/22/2008, -5/+78. Manager Who Refuses to Recognize the Words Small, Medium, and Large
I understand, you’re a corporate guy and thus must abide by company policies by calling the different sizes by their Starbucks Christian names of Venti, Grande, etc…. But if I ask you for a small, don’t act like I’m speaking to you in that Native American langauge we used in World War II to deliver coded messages. You’re familiar with the sizes small, medium and large, and if you’re not, then you might want to change underwear because there’s a good chance there’s a sizeable amount of ***** in them due to your inability to grasp the concept of wiping your ***** after defecating.
7. Intern Who is Buying for the Entire Office
Wearing an all-white or striped button down shirt, this guy shows up with a legal pad full of hastily scribbled orders. “Yeah, I’m gonna need 24 tall skinny soy lattes with sugar free hazelnut extra hot…and 32 grande no caff cappuccinos with light whip cream, sugar free hazelnut and vanilla with white chocolate mocha. And 14 grande supremos with a triple shot, sugar free vanilla, extra white mocha, no whip, no foam and an extra drizzle. Oh, and can I get a smiley face on the bottom of all those?” And he knows if one of these orders is screwed up, it’s going to cost him a chance at the a full-time gig as assistant editor where he can bring coffee to even more important people. So instead of just grabbing his bags and leaving, he inspects all 70-odd cups in his 17 flimsy cardboard holders. If you get behind this guy, you may as well give up any hopes of getting a cup of joe in your lifetime. You’re better off flying to Columbia, slitting Juan Valdez’s throat and stealing his coffee-harvesting burro.
6. The Writer Who Wants You to Know They’re a Writer
Being a writer is a pretty cool occupation, but unfortunately you can’t tell someone’s a writer just by looking at them. And having to tell someone you’re a writer is way less impressive. Therefore, these people go to the busiest Starbucks and pop open their iMac, making sure their screen is clearly displaying a full page of text (or clear screenplay format for those in Los Angeles). Their next step is to make sure they’re facing away from where everyone goes to pick up their drinks while staring at the screen while remembering to take deep breaths which will indicate to others that deep and creative thought that normal minds are not capable of, is taking place. Who gives a ***** if an ***** and his mac have spent six hours taking up a table normally reserved for four people, it’s important you know that they’re juggling a complex story about a boy in Alaska who comes of age and befriends a bear. That’s right, they’re creating that using only their minds!
5. Overly Happy Line Greeter/Order Taker
At some point, the Starbucks Corporation realized that their growing legions of employees didn’t have the best people skills. Their answer was to create their own version of the Wal-Mart Greeter who also takes your order. But since they don’t pay *****, you end up having some G.E.D.-havin’ dumbass or an excruciatingly-lonely elderly woman force their brand of corporate chit-chat down your throat. Instead of waiting to pay for your overpriced chai in peace, you have to deal with: “Goooooood morning today! How are you? Some kinda weather we’re having isn’t it? I wish I was outside in the park! Wouldn’t that be nice? It’s sooooo sunny! And what’s better for you than a nice big dose of Mr. Sun! Maybe some coffee? Ha! So, what can we get you today? Need a little pick-me-up? You do! I think we ALL could use one, yes we could! YES WE COULD! Anyway, I’ll get this chai order right up for you. What’s your name? Terry? That’s my cousin’s name! Small world. Yes. It. Is. Small world indeed….Hi! And how are you doing today?!?!”
4. Complicated Order Guy Who Needs his Coffee Right The F*&K Now.
When you order coffee, it shouldn’t sound like you’re giving the pass code to a missile defense system. If you’re lactose intolerant, on a strict diet, and can’t handle a full dose of caffeine, how about instead of ordering a “non-fat, grande, soy chai latte with a half shot of espresso and no foam” and then stand in front of the pick up window and pace like one of Michael Vick’s pitbulls watching Vick pull out the rape stand after losing a fight, you just grab a glass of god damn water and drink that. Last I checked that won’t give you exploding diarrhea or anxiety… unless you’re at the Starbucks in Tijuana.
3. The Guy Who Hates Starbucks But Goes There Every Day
Armed with armchair political rants, this guy is the world’s biggest bore and the world’s biggest hypocrite combined into one big uber-*****. He won’t shut up about how Starbucks is bad for the environment and how they’re taking over the world and how their coffee totally “doesn’t taste like the gourmet stuff downtown.” But when you bring up the fact that he’s ranting about Starbucks while he’s actually inside a Starbucks, his crappy hippie-wannabe excuses just start piling up. “Well, here’s the thing, I just didn’t have time to make it over to my usual coffee place. You know the one way over on 2nd Ave? Yeah, it’s one of the last mom and pop coffee shops in the area. I toooootally love that place. It’s so real. I was on my way over there, but the traffic was a killer, so I was totally forced to get my fix at this place. I mean, the rich get richer, right? That’s the law of the land. I totally can’t stand that I have to come here, but that’s what they do. They tie your hands, man. These big corporations. They just own you. They’re everywhere. Can you hand me one of those Splenda?”
2. Study Groups
Hey, screw the library with all it’s “room” and “group space.” It makes way more sense to go to an incredibly busy and crowded Starbucks with tables that have insufficient space to lay your books. Everyone knows you have a poli-sci midterm, mostly because they can hear every ***** thing you’re saying because you’re yelling so that you can be heard over a frappucino being made. If you could, would you hold a study group session in a Turkish prison? Because Starbucks is basically the same thing, except with less gay sex, and a little bit better coffee.
1. The Person Who Peruses the DVD Section As If They Might Purchase.
It’s really great when you’re waiting in line behind somebody only to realize that they’re not in line, but instead deciding whether or not they want to purchase the “Pursuit of Happyness” DVD. “Gee what’s this movie Pursuit of Happyness about? I didn’t hear of it last summer when it grossed over 100 million dollars. Even though I’ve come here for coffee, I should carefully peruse the back cover to find out more about it!” Also, please don’t pick up a copy of “Akeelah and the Bee” as if you were going to buy it. No one buys that movie. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’s not even a real movie, it was just a box cover created by a group of white Starbucks executives so that customers could hold it in their hands and pretend to read the back, giving the impression to those around them that they’re progressive thinkers who seek out and enjoy films with African American casts.
- over900000, on 05/22/2008, -18/+85Apple users.
- bbqsalad, on 05/22/2008, -7/+7They suck. Most of em.
- TheBlindGuy, on 05/22/2008, -3/+4So you mean everyone in Starbucks?
- themanflounders, on 05/23/2008, -4/+3Yeah, I hate people who are happy with their stable operating systems too. ***** hate them. All is right in the world with their computers..and their coffee..and scarves..
- joper90, on 05/22/2008, -2/+83wankers, wankers, wankers, wankers, wankers, wankers, wankers, and the odd bird with a great rack.
- FlyingSpaghetti, on 05/22/2008, -1/+12Are you the real Austin Powers?
- Huangism, on 05/22/2008, -10/+4buried for "top whatever" starbucks sucks balls
- Shaman760, on 05/22/2008, -10/+5I avoid that whole entire process and just don't go to Charbucks. Their coffee still sucks, even after they closed down their entire chain to "train" baristas how to punch a button on an automatic machine that STILL makes a ***** cuppa.
- azbmr, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4You're definitely thinking of Dunkin Donuts there.
- rrbest, on 05/23/2008, -0/+3The closing down was a marketing gimmick, if you didn't realize that, then you're not thinking hard enough.
- mikephimikephi, on 05/22/2008, -14/+36Dunkin Donuts coffee is so much cheaper and tastier
- brstilson, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4Not if you just order a simple coffee.
- Aensland, on 05/22/2008, -7/+13Safer too, considering how many cops hang out there...
- jumico, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5That's actually less safe.
- ZeroIce, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Don't tase me bro.
- jumico, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5That's actually less safe.
- WomensUnderwear, on 05/22/2008, -8/+2you utter crackhead. dunkin donuts 'coffee' is the single most disgusting variation of pisswater available to man. even starbucks bitter, burnt ***** is preferable
- Nesh, on 05/22/2008, -0/+6Wow, someone who's experienced in ingesting both pisswater and burnt *****. That's a rarity
- Bilabrin, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4In a blind tast test the company with the double arch logo was rated equally to Starbucks coffee!
http://www.foodtv.ca/BLOG/archive/2007/02/13/mcdon ...- blitz718, on 05/22/2008, -1/+0While this is well known, the article you linked says otherwise
- drmangrum, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2*****. Mcdonalds coffee tastes like ass. They use few beans the coffee looks like tea. Cofffee should be BLACK, not a light brown.
- tehHardcorez, on 05/22/2008, -2/+3enough cream and sugar could make a pot of my stool taste good too
- ChromaVita, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5I really doubt that to tell you the truth...
- buckrogers1965, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1mmmmmh Nutty! - Austin Powers
- thethorax, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2And you can buy it in bulk at Costco!
- audioscience, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2DD is overrated.
- lizwearstights, on 05/22/2008, -0/+0Speaking of Duncan Donuts, did Le Tigre do that song on their commercial?
Yes, this is the only way I know how to use the internet to figure things out.
- LZeppelinJ0, on 05/22/2008, -2/+10Anyone ever been to Robson St. in Vancouver? There's seriously one intersection where there are two Starbucks right across the street from each other.
- riskybeats, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5Thats nothing. In Langley, there is a starbucks attached to a safeway, which has a starbucks right beside the entrance IN the Safeway, with a starbucks across the street in the chapters, which has a starbucks right beside the olive garden across the highway. WHAT THE *****
- Stewage, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1What the hell are they building there by Mountain Secondary? it's huge.
- omgJOHN, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1I saw that for the first time about seven years ago and was absolutely floored. Couldn't believe it at all.
I now walk by there a couple times a week and I still think it's ridiculous. - samuraipizzacat, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1In Vic there are actually 2 on Government St on the same block with another one on Yates and Government
- Riggs, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1Look around in Manhattan. There is a starbucks (that is usually packed) on every street corner.
- vkiperman, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1Try Seattle. Pfffft.
- riskybeats, on 05/22/2008, -0/+5Thats nothing. In Langley, there is a starbucks attached to a safeway, which has a starbucks right beside the entrance IN the Safeway, with a starbucks across the street in the chapters, which has a starbucks right beside the olive garden across the highway. WHAT THE *****
- imamessy1, on 05/22/2008, -1/+45Unfortunately, they want you to be annoyingly talkative, and it was the one thing I hated while working at Starbucks. Half of these people are impatient and waiting for their coffee. They don't want the person making it to make small talk with them when they could be focusing on making the drink as fast as possible. Apparently making small talk is supposed to make it feel like being at home. I just find it uncomfortable. Maybe I'm just more of a fan of the awkward silence. At least it's quiet.
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -0/+39Maybe they ought to try separating customers in to two lines: the "shut up and get me my coffee" line and the "I've got nothing better to do" line.
- freedomwv, on 05/22/2008, -0/+7I tend to be the person who says just give me my coffee and get the ***** out of my face.
- Arcesius, on 05/22/2008, -4/+2........
- zaco, on 05/22/2008, -1/+2well its a good thing you guys have the internet to talk to people.
- kh99, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1You're right. On the internet you don't have to pay attention to anything you're not interested in. In person, people seem to find that behavior rude.
- ikcilabd, on 05/22/2008, -11/+4I like Marteen, Fayne and Dora, but i can't stand Hanners or Raven
- DownkeyKowng, on 05/22/2008, -2/+2That comic sucks.
- Envark, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2What about Penelope?
- suzywang3000, on 05/22/2008, -14/+5and don't forget about cheeky arabs...
- brownrecluse888, on 05/22/2008, -15/+6They forgot the most obvious one: Annoying digg user submitting Obama Spam and drinking a double mocha latte half decaf super mushy slushie
- Bilabrin, on 05/22/2008, -0/+1Actually, from the people I've personally met, I'd have to say that it's the Hillary supporters who frequent Starbucks. I'm not shilling either way, I'm a Ron Paul man but from what I see, it's Hillary who seems to attract those kind of people.
- rryanhayes, on 05/22/2008, -17/+281#9 - The "Super Cool" guy who goes to Starbucks to try to make keen observations of people, only to write an article about them all later, in which he tries too hard to be funny.
- sovereign3, on 05/22/2008, -2/+73I bet the guy who wrote this wrote it at a Starbucks; making sure to expose a screen full of text and releasing frequent deep sighs of creative frustration.
- rryanhayes, on 05/22/2008, -1/+48....AND I spoke the words out loud as I typed them just to really let everyone know just how creative I really am.
- mariowario, on 05/22/2008, -2/+5AND then stop! It's hammer time.
- stayhumble, on 05/22/2008, -1/+4...while waiting for his large office order of drinks that don't exist: like soy chai lattes with espresso in them
- blitz718, on 05/22/2008, -15/+9#10 The guy on digg who tries to be funny by posting his own mock item making fun of the author of the article.
Starbucks sucks.- MasterGrief, on 05/22/2008, -1/+1While I agree with you and the sentiment of this article, I must say also I agree with rryanhayes here. The writing wasn't funny, it was just mindless vulgarity in an attempt to shock some laughs out of the end of a paragraph that was too dull to do so in the first place.
- buckrogers1965, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1You say mindless vulgarity like it's a ***** bad thing.
- LogitechG15, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2#12 The guy on digg who tries to be funny by posting his own mock item making fun of the poster of a digg post criticizing the author of an article.
- LogitechG15, on 05/22/2008, -0/+2Hey, that's me as well!
- MasterGrief, on 05/22/2008, -1/+1While I agree with you and the sentiment of this article, I must say also I agree with rryanhayes here. The writing wasn't funny, it was just mindless vulgarity in an attempt to shock some laughs out of the end of a paragraph that was too dull to do so in the first place.
- rryanhayes, on 05/22/2008, -8/+10#11 - The guy on digg who tries to be funny by posting his own mock item, making fun of the guy, making fun of the author of the article.
....we could do this all day.... - freakk123, on 05/22/2008, -1/+6Tries too hard to be funny by make fun of popular things? That sounds like HolyTaco.com to me!
- JPepp8, on 05/22/2008, -2/+4Seems like the writer of this story is #3: the guy that hates starbucks but goes there everyday. He might also be #6. He probably wrote this on his Mac at Starbucks.
- stayhumble, on 05/23/2008, -0/+1NAILED IT!
- gwaggy12, on 05/22/2008, -0/+3No *****. I suppose minding your own business doesn't sell many ads on your blog though. When will the internets move beyond annoyed rants? They're just not funny anymore.
- wondertwins, on 05/23/2008, -1/+1AKA 6. The Writer Who Wants You to Know They’re a Writer
- soinie, on 05/22/2008, -13/+28Starbucks is where the asshats go.
- diggit08, on 05/22/2008, -1/+12When people start standing in line to pay $5.00+ for coffee you know the world has gone to *****.
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