What is Digg?Sponsored by Microsoft
Microsoft responds to the headlines. view!
microsoft.com/everybodysbusiness - Read our developers’ points of view on the headlines making news.
164 Comments
- TobiasParker, on 07/09/2009, -4/+290This was funny as usual but with some crucial missteps.
1: "First of all, Jabba holds two high-profile prisoners but never demands a ransom of any kind, and in point of fact refuses money when it is offered to him."
- Han already owed Jabba a substantial sum for dumping his spice after being boarded by(or at the the first sign of) an Imperial Cruiser. He was using him as an example for what happens when you cross him. Classic gangster methods. Leia was another story.
2. More than 2 pilots survived the death star assault, they later formed Rogue Squadron. But that is just splitting hairs.
3. "There he waits for the moon itself to pop into view."
- The Death Star rotated around the planet
4. "Blasting the ***** off of the planet that it orbits, which will send it careening off into space like Gary Busey on a motorcycle. So why wait? "
-Because Yavin was a Gas Giant several hundred times larger than the Death Star itself. Alderaan was a small planet like Earth or Mars. Destroying a Gas Giant, if it was even possible, would probably release so much energy and radiation that the death star itself would be destroyed.
5. "Okay, we get that this was presumably a temporary measure while the Death Star was under construction. But one would think getting the on-board shields running would be higher on the worklist,"
-Planet based shield generators were much more powerful than ship based ones, look at the battle of Hoth.
6. "Instead the crucial shield generator is stashed behind one locked door on a moon full of hostile natives, inside a small building that seems like it could have been pretty easily bombed from orbit by the rebels (and the shield generator's shields didn't protect the generator itself, obviously). "
-Again look at the battle of Hoth, planet based shield generators are invulnerable to attack from orbit, however can be disabled/destroyed by ground troops.
7. "When the only escape pod to be launched from the ship goes rocketing past Vader's Star Destroyer (a pod we know contains C3PO and R2D2), the Commander on board lets it slide because there aren't any life forms on board."
-There are two conflicting quotes from the movie, one saying "Another escape pod was ejected" by the gunner crews and then "An escape pod was ejected during the fighting." by the officer briefing Vader. Vader wanted to find the plans not destroy them, if he blew them up then he would never know if the rebels got a hold of them. Otherwise he coulda just blew up the entire Tantive IV.
So do I have a Job? - rocknog, on 07/09/2009, -0/+153Admiral Motti had a point, though. Why couldn't Darth Vader use the Force to track down the plans, or find the secret Rebel base?
EDIT:
Oh, and I have to say, there's a certain irony in that the toy package has "warning: choking hazard" written on it. - TobiasParker, on 07/09/2009, -0/+103Re: "So do I have a Job?":
I have been sitting on a video of a bunch of Drunk people singing along to Bohemian Rhapsody that includes a long haired guy in chainmail doing an Air guitar solo. It could be yours. - TobiasParker, on 07/09/2009, -0/+102I always screw up those two, I don't hide my failures. But am flattered that someone with the name "chewbacca" only found a vocabulary mistake to be my only flaw in a star wars thread.
- below413, on 07/09/2009, -1/+93Anyone else notice the "WARNING: CHOKING HAZARD" label on the action figure of admiral motti getting force-choked?
- TheRedeemer, on 07/09/2009, -2/+91Regarding Darth Vader: "He even forgoes his normal practice of choking people with his mind to choke a dude for real."
Best line ever! - Awwzm, on 07/09/2009, -0/+86Porkins should've ejected.
- leonardutah, on 07/09/2009, -1/+77Porkins deserved his own number.
"Pull up porkins!"
"Can't, too fat!"
RIP Officer Porkins. - chewbacca77, on 07/09/2009, -3/+67The Death Star *revolved* around the planet.
- inactive, on 07/09/2009, -1/+49Dugg for "giant sand vagina"
- cnot3, on 07/09/2009, -0/+47His fat ass would have gotten stuck.
- Narcism, on 07/09/2009, -0/+45What about the Storm Trooper that doesn't check the locked door. Fail.
- angusm, on 07/09/2009, -0/+43Does the phrase "small thermal exhaust port" mean anything to anyone here?
Granted, this isn't my area of expertise, but I think that if I was designing a giant invulnerable battlestation that can melt planets, I might just devote a little time to covering up any holes that led directly to the main reactor. And I might actually have saved some money by filling that convenient trench with large sturdy metal poles, instead of installing expensive 'turbo-lasers' that couldn't seem to hit any character who had more than two lines of dialogue.
"Use the Force on _this_, sandboy." - Sornos, on 07/09/2009, -6/+48The Yavin IV example and the shield generator explanation are weak.
The Death Star can move faster than light. Just blow up Yavin IV, then hustle on out of there before the blast wave gets there.
Or just park the Death Star a couple million kilometers away and fire safely from there. It's not like a laser has a range issue.
Or how about just using the Death Star's FTL drive to move it to a point where it can see the moon instead of coming out of hyperspace on the wrong side of the planet?
Planet based shield generators are stronger, eh? What about when your ship is a god damn moon? They could have easily built thousands of those generators on the Death Star 2 itself. The Executor was 19 km long and during the scene where it impacts the surface of the ol' death ball, you can barely see the curvature.
And the last thing: "he blew them up then he would never know if the rebels got a hold of them". Doesn't that seem a little... counterproductive? When rebels steal the most important document in the Empire, one would think it would be wise to assume that confirming that they have it would be a luxury and not a priority. - Nidy1, on 07/09/2009, -0/+40My vote goes to the guy who managed to navigate the Death Star trench and then missed the hole. It really is the definition of dropping the ball. You have one job.
- ShingoEX, on 07/09/2009, -1/+39FTL is simply an abbreviation. Light speed, hyperspace, FTL. It's not exclusive to any particular universe.
- martoq, on 07/09/2009, -0/+38That is a t-shirt waiting to be made sir.
- rocknog, on 07/09/2009, -0/+32I thought it was kind of mean that they called the fat guy Porkins.
- whiteblackninja, on 07/09/2009, -0/+31"When the only escape pod to be launched from the ship..."
Actually, it wasn't the only escape pod. Yeh, I know I'm a geek, but in the film, the guy says "There goes another one!" before he's told to hold his fire, there are no lifeforms aboard. So... maybe they were getting tired of blasting people trying to escape at this point? Great article. - chewbacca77, on 07/09/2009, -1/+31Hah! No, your points made sense for the most part.
- inactive, on 07/09/2009, -1/+30*orbited*
- NCg8r, on 07/09/2009, -1/+29Come on... Greedo? Porkins? I'm sure the lone black guy was named Sargeant Darkley...
- plainOldFool, on 07/09/2009, -3/+29NERD!
- directedition, on 07/09/2009, -0/+26I don't know. Ejecting and landing on the surface of the Deathstar... seems like you're equally ***** no matter what.
- CoreyTamas, on 07/09/2009, -3/+26Good luck holding on to your lunch money, Poindexter.
- Fhwqhgads, on 07/09/2009, -0/+22George Lucas is more than capable of doing that.
- kingmanic, on 07/09/2009, -0/+22'Admiral Motti had a point, though. Why couldn't Darth Vader use the Force to track down the plans, or find the secret Rebel base?'
The galaxy is a big big place. Probably way too much force noise. - JonTheGoose, on 07/09/2009, -1/+21"These aren't the droids we're looking for."
- ACiDGRiM, on 07/09/2009, -1/+20Put a tennis ball in the exhaust of your car and see how well it runs.
- Bic823, on 07/09/2009, -1/+19They were pretty valid criticisms.. it's not like they were slapping the franchise in the face.
- Awwzm, on 07/09/2009, -0/+17Red 6
- rocknog, on 07/09/2009, -2/+19Regarding the hyperspace question, Yavin would've had a huge gravity well, which interferes with hyperspace travel. They probably would've had to drop out the moment they reached it, and so would've been forced to use sublight travel to position themselves to reach the moon.
- JonTheGoose, on 07/09/2009, -0/+16"Seriously, how to you miss a stationary hole with a target tracking torpedo?"
That's what she said. - BossKey, on 07/09/2009, -1/+17There's the plot hole where the Rebels get to fly down trenches and Luke is saved by the Millennium Falcon so that he can blow up the Death Star. This is only possible because Death Star personnel totally dropped the ball.
Remember earlier in the movie when the Millennium Falcon was captured by the Death Star tractor beam? It escaped because Obi-Wan turned off the tractor beam.
So by the time the Rebel fighters show up, the Death Star crew hasn't:
1. noticed that the tractor beam is off
2. turned it back on
3. used it to suck the entire attacking Rebel fighter fleet into 50 of the nearest docking bays
4. and the Millennium Falcon too, again - mlvassallo, on 07/09/2009, -0/+15"Somewhere down there Jimmy Smitts is burning to death."
I love it. - DAVENP0RT, on 07/09/2009, -4/+19That's bold of Cracked to insult Star Wars when their reading base consists mostly of geeks. Nevertheless, well played.
- STBAT25, on 07/09/2009, -0/+15I love Digg. The geekyness is palatable.
- TobiasParker, on 07/09/2009, -0/+14My only response to the shield generator comments is that in the Star Wars universe these giant shield generators have to be projected around objects, which would be impossible from inside a giant metal/alloy structure. In Jedi if you look at the way the generator is represented in the hologram, it is 'shooting' off of the planet and around the Death Star, it looks like that is a weakness in those large shields. The shields in the Star Wars universe is different than star trek. They are much bigger and weaker, I mean most versions of TIE fighters don't even have shields.
As to the hyperspace comments, I am pretty certain that Hyperspace consists of fixed routes and is slightly more finicky than star treks warp drive. For example when Han/Luke/Obi-Wan are escaping from Mos Eisely, Han says "without the precise calculations we will pass too close to a star or bounce into a supernova and that would end your trip real quick kid". As opposed to star trek where they just pick a direction and go, and can do silly things like the Picard Manuever.
The other more nuanced reason for not destroying the Tantive IV was because the Imperial Senate had yet to be abolished and Leia was a very popular senator and her father was a know rebellion supporter, killing her would not only create a public outcry, she would become a martyr. But then they kinda go balls to the wall and start blowing up planets. - LPfmAAF, on 07/09/2009, -0/+14All they needed was a metal grate there.
- shoyurx, on 07/09/2009, -0/+14Is Darth Vader gonna have to choke a bitch?
- waluigi14, on 07/09/2009, -0/+14He missed the hole with a weapon that can obviously auto-target. Seriously, how to you miss a stationary hole with a target tracking torpedo?
- argagarg, on 07/09/2009, -1/+15FTA: "Chewie is an alien monster roughly the size of a doorframe with murderous rage tap-dancing around in his brain."
I read that as "murderous rape." It threw me off. - spikewilbury, on 07/09/2009, -0/+14If you consider the books written later to be canon, the Empire does continues to fight on as a splintered group of warlords.
- rocknog, on 07/09/2009, -0/+13If the Force didn't interact with inanimate objects, the Jedi would've been slaughtered pretty goddamn quick by the battledroids in the Clone Wars.
- TobiasParker, on 07/09/2009, -0/+13You are right, i do not. All of the management at my previous job was fired and i am taking the opportunity to go back to school. So ***** off.
- B1665r, on 07/09/2009, -0/+12They would discriminate because they were such awful shots. It would be better for them to tell their middle manager that they chose not to fire at it than it would be to tell their supervisor they shot at it and missed.
- GiggleStick, on 07/09/2009, -0/+12You mean it controls our actions?
- censormagnet, on 07/09/2009, -0/+12ya like rocks?
- michaelrsa, on 07/09/2009, -1/+13The thing that really gets me in the end is that the war is over after the Emperor is killed on the Death Star. They have thousands of ships and a fleet far greater than the rebels and they lose because the emperor dies?
That's like if the president was on an aircraft carrier and terrorist blow it up causing the U.S. to surrender to them. - directedition, on 07/09/2009, -0/+12Poor engineer. His next project was Windows ME.
-
Show 51 - 100 of 168 discussions
© Digg Inc. 2009
— Content created and posted by Digg users is