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5 Bizarre Sexual Conditions That Can Ruin Your Life

cracked.com — Sometimes you hear on the news about weird medical conditions that actually cause more sex than normal. While sounding awesome these conditions are kind of like eating at Taco Bell, you may be left with internal bleeding.

Who dugg this? Made popular Jul 6, 2009

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119 Comments

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  • inactive, on 07/06/2009, -2/+160I totally thought nevernudes was going to be on the list because of the pic at the top of the article
  • JT114881, on 07/06/2009, -5/+113I just ate a grape and I JIZZED IN MY PANTS

    Edit: Damn it I should refresh before I comment.
  • zephc, on 07/06/2009, -1/+92#6: Sexlexia
  • jm5chn, on 07/06/2009, -1/+84When we say you're turned on all the time, we mean to the point that at the drop of a hat, you have an orgasm. The phone rings? Orgasm. White socks today? Orgasm. Caught your parents having sex? Goddamnit, orgasm.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pXfHLUlZf4&fmt ...
  • theaceoface, on 07/06/2009, -3/+82"Is that your wife humping my car?!"
  • mrmod, on 07/06/2009, -2/+67So Sexsomnia is what it's called. My girlfriend and therapist will be elated that there's a name for what's wrong with me other than our term: 'sleep rape'.
    Benefits: You have sex while asleep possibly intertwined with another sexual dream, which _can_ be awesome. The whole event seems like a dream when I wake up.
    Drawbacks: It's scary for your girlfriend since you're like a zombie. Or at least I am. "Vagina! Vaaaginaaaaa!"

    thank you Dr Internets!
  • rdoger6424, on 07/06/2009, -1/+65My token was invalid and I JIZZED IN MY PANTS
  • FredFredrickson, on 07/06/2009, -0/+59I suffer from a very sexy learning disorder. What's it called, Kif?
  • bman85, on 07/06/2009, -3/+57Lol..

    "like mom always said, ***** a horse and you'll die from a perforated colon."
  • Governator88, on 07/06/2009, -1/+53"You may want to hide those garden gnomes."
  • mikbunn, on 07/06/2009, -0/+52Your mom definitely doesn't suffer from priapism.
  • MrSparkle666, on 07/06/2009, -0/+45I've had the same thing happen numerous times. I usually wake up at some point during the sex, but I can never remember initiating it. It just feels like I'm having a really nice sexual dream and then I wake up and realize that I'm actually having sex. Luckily, most women I've been with have really enjoyed being woken up in the middle of the night by random sex. I've never had any complaints. They usually think it's pretty hot, and none no one has ever referred to it as 'sleep rape,' However, they do find it slightly disturbing that I was asleep for half of the sexual encounter.
  • Xaevier, on 07/06/2009, -0/+40The real question is did she enjoy it more before or after you woke up...
  • SuperflyTNT19, on 07/06/2009, -10/+44I read this article and I jizzed in my pants
  • UNDERSTAR, on 07/06/2009, -1/+34Death by Snu Snu
  • lisaawesome, on 07/06/2009, -1/+32Dude seriously? The gays are a happy people in my experience. I mean they're even called gay.
  • XISUPERMANIX, on 07/06/2009, -2/+31I imagine being a "never nude" would suck too.
  • Misanthropology, on 07/06/2009, -0/+28http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v40/cress/arrest ...
  • chuckDontSurf, on 07/06/2009, -0/+22Two words: hidden camera.
  • steelersfan7roe, on 07/06/2009, -3/+20I read "5 bizarre sexual positions that can ruin your life" and thought... Can't they all?
  • dazparkour, on 07/06/2009, -0/+17If your wife has built in excuses to avoid sex with you, sexomnia doesn't sound like much of a problem anymore.
  • tolstoi78, on 07/06/2009, -0/+16I have to say Sexomnia sucks ass. Not only do I miss out on the act itself, but it becomes a built in argument for my wife saying that we just had sex, and there is no way for me to know one way or the other.
  • 10lbhammer, on 07/06/2009, -0/+14"I thought you said he was dead!"

    "no, I said he sleeps with the fishes..."
  • renanrrinaldi, on 07/06/2009, -0/+13There are dozens of us!!
  • PowderedToasty, on 07/06/2009, -0/+13Wow dude, way to be on the spot with the weird photo.
  • Daxx22, on 07/07/2009, -0/+11Sounds like you need a new couples therapist if they've never heard of this before.
  • Killerah, on 07/07/2009, -0/+10*SPOILER*

    You obviously haven't seen The Sixth Sense because he died at the beginning.
  • Neonic7, on 07/07/2009, -0/+9I think the Digg community appreciates your honesty and willingness to edit your posts accordingly.
  • endustry, on 07/06/2009, -0/+8I'd add latex allergies to the list. It's hard to play it safe when 99% of condoms are made out of a material that your skin wants nothing to do with.
  • PottSie2, on 07/07/2009, -3/+10No #1. Marriage.
  • thesonofdarwin, on 07/06/2009, -0/+7I'm not sure what this has to do with the article, but if you want to go that route I'd say number six should be shared between hetero- and *****- sexuality. As a bisexual, both sides are unnecessarily limiting their prospects.
  • L4mb, on 07/06/2009, -1/+8***** they're talking about Mr. Hands. I wish I never saw that ***** video.
  • gjdj3, on 07/06/2009, -4/+10Dugg for Arrested Development
  • evw2k, on 07/07/2009, -0/+6watch arrested development
  • steelersfan7roe, on 07/06/2009, -3/+9http://www.heaven666.org/pussy-apple-9185.php
  • astrotrain, on 07/06/2009, -2/+8I like tacos too... pink tacos are my favorite.
  • QreepyBORIS, on 07/06/2009, -0/+6Eating Taco Bell is like having someone pull the figurative fire alarm to your colon.

    Everything evacuates.
  • DeadlyAlpaca, on 07/07/2009, -0/+5DOZENS
  • SpykeKelm, on 07/07/2009, -0/+5Pshh, no. If a girl's on top, she can't get pregnant. I mean, that's just gravity... It's science.
  • bdfariello, on 07/07/2009, -0/+5I'm pretty sure he does. Notice the "no thanks" portion of his comment.
  • zaxnyd, on 07/07/2009, -0/+5Apparently yours was funnier.
  • Soniti, on 07/06/2009, -1/+6I think this is one of Cracked's weaker articles...
  • mardraum, on 07/07/2009, -3/+7buried for smarmy
  • s0nicfreak, on 07/06/2009, -0/+4Oh god I thought that said "My grandmother" and I was very disturbed.
  • BotchaMcCoola, on 07/06/2009, -0/+4Frequently old timers, especially in nursing homes, get Hypersexuality. Ask a nurse. But on the good side, there may be some hope in this for those of us with declining libido.
  • Xaevier, on 07/06/2009, -1/+5I think I just threw up in my mouth...
  • Atom, on 07/07/2009, -0/+3troll account. flag and tag him
  • bubbameister33, on 07/06/2009, -0/+3But it is sad.
  • thcobbs, on 07/06/2009, -0/+3Cartman?
  • Sutley, on 07/07/2009, -3/+5^ I bet you're a nevernude.
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