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Rachel Ray Before She Was Famous watch!

youtube.com — Never before heard, early Rachel Ray audio before she was famous. Satire. Sex

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  • optimusprime01, on 06/01/2008, -9/+66Well, she loves facial for sure :).
    • Gman8941, on 06/02/2008, -8/+5
      • pintomp3, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3she likes wearing a terrorist pearl necklace?
      • Suzilla, on 06/02/2008, -2/+1No, no! She's an alien. There's a video. I've seen it.
    • ahmedb07, on 06/02/2008, -4/+6buried for lame...yeah, i just went there.
    • larah, on 06/03/2008, -2/+1sounds like a fake mashup. a lot of familiar lines from her cooking shows.
    • Djchicken, on 06/05/2008, -0/+1So, i herd u liek facials?
    • digg0t, on 06/06/2008, -0/+1All I was thinking throughout that clip was "Thats what she said!"
  • killbert24, on 06/02/2008, -19/+158Wow that was hot. I came two times during this: at the word grease and then again at salami. Gotta love the raspy new yorker voice.
    • Scrappy1850, on 06/02/2008, -1/+64that voice comes courtesy of Marlboro, not NY
      • geobay, on 06/02/2008, -1/+7Don't forget the whiskey

        Oh yeah.....fap fap fap fap
    • rezist, on 06/02/2008, -10/+3she's from Glens Falls NY, "Hometown USA." It's some place in the middle of nowhere, not NYC.
      • cawpin, on 06/02/2008, -2/+10Too bad he didn't say NYC...
        • minox, on 06/02/2008, -2/+5Technically true. But I have never heard someone say "New Yorker" conversationally unless they were referring to the magazine, the hotel, or a resident of the city.
        • craven005, on 06/02/2008, -0/+9I don't know what you're talking about, because here in Vermont everyone refers to anyone with a New York license plate as a "New Yorker".

          As in...
          "***** New Yorker can't drive worth a *****!"
        • rezist, on 06/05/2008, -0/+1People in the state of NY speak in many diff. dialectd such as Inland Northerner, etc... When someone refers to an individual as having a new yorker accent... it is real clear use the ***** wiki... a new yorker accent is what it is. Boston, Minesota, Texas, India, Japan, Australia, England... don't be stupid, you know what a new yorker accent is
        • rezist, on 06/05/2008, -0/+1do some reseach a new yorker accent is what it is *****, too bad you don't know that
      • Punkazz189, on 06/02/2008, -2/+3She's actually from Luzerne, it's a ***** little mountain town in the Adirondacks (about 1 hour north of Albany)
        Glens Falls is just easier to say because it is actually on the map.
    • tjmb9, on 06/02/2008, -0/+5The audio doesn't do justice to her very tiny titties.
      http://tinyurl.com/3cln44
      • Scrappy1850, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4my god... i never realized how small they were
      • Mattrofl, on 06/03/2008, -0/+4she could always stuff.... i mean we all like to imagine her naked
    • megamod, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2well just make sure to keep it 'up' "you don't want your ***** to get mushy on you", you never know when you'll run into Rachel Ray. You know what she says...: "there's not a ***** that I have ever met that I have not liked"
  • SRSco, on 06/02/2008, -81/+25This is lame and Rachel Ray is a big fat disgusting slob.
    • unreg, on 06/02/2008, -15/+14Gotta agree. The women is perky to the point of being annoying.
    • joebaloney, on 06/02/2008, -8/+41I'd like to see a picture of you, you must be freakin' awesome.
      • follower64, on 06/02/2008, -4/+3BURN! I logged in just to Digg you.
        • mikesbaker, on 06/02/2008, -1/+1now thats a meme I haven't seen around here in a long time
    • Zzone, on 06/02/2008, -5/+3Rachel Ray is the white chef version of Oprah.
    • caramba420, on 06/02/2008, -4/+1Nuh-uh
    • hmunkey, on 06/02/2008, -2/+4She actually isn't that ugly. She's just annoying as hell.
  • plasticgonads, on 06/02/2008, -4/+28size DOES matter!
    • bobdotcom, on 06/02/2008, -4/+1of course size matters, if it doesn't matter, why aren't there any 4 inch dildoes!
      • RpgActioN, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4There are dildos and vibes smaller than that....
        • happyseamonster, on 06/03/2008, -0/+2Those are just ***** actuators not dildoponamous probations.
      • hansk, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1i think of dick size like i do boulder size. sure, you could take down castle walls with one huge boulder, or just use lots and lots of smaller stones, it all gets the job done, it just takes more time. so, um, if you dont have a huge boulder in your pants, just keep tossing those pebbles until the walls come crashing down.
  • rapcrap187, on 06/02/2008, -8/+221Awsome editing haha
    • Markpdotcom, on 06/02/2008, -3/+16Sorry for the comment abuse, but for those of us in the rest of the world, who the hell is Rachel Ray?
      • Nezacant, on 06/02/2008, -1/+22Wrote books on how to make good meals in under 30 minutes. She then had a cooking show called 30 Minute meals. Now is a Big TV personality with her own talk show. Known for her very upbeat personality.
        • xanadont, on 06/02/2008, -0/+12Only the problem is all her "30" minute meals require about an hour in prep work.
      • lordthor, on 06/02/2008, -1/+35and her bewbs.
        • plainOldFool, on 06/02/2008, -19/+2Dugg for your use of "bewbs". Never seen boobies termed quite like that.
        • Spuy767, on 06/03/2008, -0/+2I don't think she's known for her "bewbs," but I've never heard anyone decry her bottom.
      • garsha, on 06/02/2008, -3/+3An annoying woman who pretends to be a chef.
        • BearinG, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1She isn't an actual "chef".. for those who buried you..
    • najdorf, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1I thought it was some kind of porn radio show until i read the comments...
    • IglooBurner, on 06/02/2008, -1/+2Should do the same for giada too. damn i'd pick giada over rachel anyday.
      • Klinky, on 06/02/2008, -1/+2Giada has a giant noggin and a small body. It's almost like an optical illusion. She has a bubbly pep that is just as bad as Rachel Ray.
        • BearinG, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1Its all pretty proportional though if you see enough of her shows
  • theYevvin, on 06/02/2008, -15/+2"It comes out of your pores so I always end up smelling like a salami"

    [obligatory sexual comment]
  • IHaveIssues, on 06/02/2008, -4/+58Ok, that was well done. :-)
    • DangerCollie, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4Someone has way too much time on their hands but that was laugh out loud funny. Especially when the pounding noises are going on in the background.

      They left out the obvious opportunity to get clips of her talking about which knife to use to trim a little off the side or dipping it in hot oil or boiling it. They could have gotten way out there.

      Just give it good yank.
  • jordanmichael39, on 06/02/2008, -18/+382Oh! I get it! Because they are all sexual sounding out of context!
  • RandyGandy, on 06/02/2008, -3/+13great choice of music
  • theradical, on 06/02/2008, -2/+14now if she could just figure out a way to combine the explicit sexual descriptions with the dumb cooking shows...
    • Bith8654, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2Don't you see!? She already has! You just have to listen closely!
  • snotrokit, on 06/02/2008, -17/+2so much for that. anybody have a mirror? YouTube yanked it
  • cmuwriter, on 06/02/2008, -35/+280
    • TomFrost, on 06/02/2008, -4/+65While I generally agree with your logic, I think TV has pulled the wool over our eyes :(. Reading interviews with people she's worked with, she appears to be Satan in disguise as far as how she treats people.
      • Scrappy1850, on 06/02/2008, -3/+50judging by her arms she looks more like a t-rex in disguise.
      • mustafya, on 06/02/2008, -4/+10She came to my town and pissed off all the restaraunts for one of her tasty travels shows. Evidently she frequently got extremely drunk during the dinner and made an ass of herself. Plus several restaraunts paid her to come review them and she never showed up but took the money. Pretty much everyone that came in contact with her claimed she was pretty bitchy.
      • oyflaaaayvin, on 06/02/2008, -0/+10Thirded. I have friends who went to one of her book-signings and they said she was a thundercunt to everyone there.
    • blackinthmiddle, on 06/02/2008, -3/+23I guess a lot of people find her attractive. To me, she's okay but nothing to write home about. And as a native New Yorker, not all women sound like her. I'm actually not that found of her voice. Reminds me of a slightly subdued Fran Drescher.
      • chanop, on 06/02/2008, -1/+3Long Island accent. Annoys the ***** out of me sometimes...
        • majortom1981, on 06/03/2008, -0/+0I am from long island and most people here sound nothing like that.Like somebody else said its more of a smoking thing than any thing else.
      • michaeltime, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3I could listen to Fran Drescher all night
        • bitterbug, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1"Please don't kill me. Just take the jewelry and leave."
      • blackinthmiddle, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1I knew something looked wrong when I wrote it. It's "fond", not "found". I *just* figured it out!
      • BearinG, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1I agree she's okay but nothing incredible.. there are at least 5 hotter women just in my office.People just make a celebrities more attractive than they really are (compared to "real" people).. even the guys think so too now. Ok, she's gotten a few good "money shots" but ... I guess not everyone's girlfriend is watching the FOOD Network 24/7 like mine.. Rachael annoys the hell out of me.. she talks like she's talking to kindergarden children.. And her voice gets pretty irritating after a while. Just for the sake of the argument, I hate Paris Hilton but still think she is hotter than Rachel Ray.

        She's like Ellen Degenerate.. not "too" pretty, "sounds" genuine.. its the women that like her caus she doesn't make them look too bad. I still don't know why she became so popular. Specially compared to all the other chefs, why not like Giada De Laurentiis, she's italian, chef, she's a tiny lady (short), she's always wearing low-cut shirts with huge cleavage..
    • NovaPrime9, on 06/02/2008, -8/+147Not me. That upbeat, always happy ***** would become very irritating after a while. And the ninth time she called a sandwich a "sammy," I'd probably toss her out a window.
      • aspec, on 06/02/2008, -0/+38Yum-O.
      • xanadont, on 06/02/2008, -0/+14Defenestration FTW.
      • halfdirt, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1I have never seen her on TV but I hear she calls extra virgin olive oil "Evoo" which only makes me lose respect for her.
    • beabis, on 06/02/2008, -1/+25But would she ever stop talking?
      • Vodd9, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3Yes.
        Just find some rope and some tape and you're good.
      • HoratioHellpop, on 06/02/2008, -0/+5Does any woman ever stop talking? My wife doesn't.
        • lordsteve, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1/rimshot
        • bravo1995, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1Take your wife. No, take her, please!
        • Ultramagnus0001, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1Haa! Ditto. I feel like I know everyone at my wife's job, but I've never seen them.
      • MrDizzy, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1just put something in her mouth.
    • ErikHarrison, on 06/02/2008, -3/+5someone needs to go outside and look around. She is ok, but not more than that.
      • cmuwriter, on 06/02/2008, -1/+8
        • daRoach, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1I'll settle for a not too pungent odor and at least 2/3 of her teeth. No fatties though.
    • ,,|,_, on 06/02/2008, -9/+8Healthy?

      "Ok, for today's 5 minute meal we're going to take a package of hotdogs and chop them up in macaroni and cheese"
    • MarkOfTheDead, on 06/02/2008, -5/+4If she was all that perfect she'd have been the one spitting on her ex-husband, Not the hookers he'd been hiring to do it.
    • omnithought, on 06/02/2008, -4/+5Yeah, something that makes me want to gag. How could anyone spend more than five seconds around her? Gotta be pretty desperate. And, she cooks mac and cheese and hamburgers...don't fool yourself. She is ***** food's best friend.
    • Wonderama, on 06/02/2008, -1/+5In theory, that sounds great. You're not married yet, are you?
    • thetanman, on 06/02/2008, -0/+6And she's filthy rich and works all the time.
    • aslemay, on 06/02/2008, -9/+71950 called.
    • KiltedMile, on 06/02/2008, -3/+5I couldn't get past that truck driver voice though... owch!
    • smashingmonkey, on 06/02/2008, -4/+5Perfect wife indeed... for Scott Peterson.
    • Nic8462, on 06/02/2008, -3/+0she would drive you crazy with her high pitched voice and stupid comments 24/7
    • alpharaptor, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4would that something be pie plate nipples?
    • IglooBurner, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4what about Giada?
      • cmuwriter, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3
        • majortom1981, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1I think giada is a fake italian. i have family in italy and they talk nothing like her and she even says the italain foods wrong.
        • BearinG, on 06/03/2008, -0/+1Bah they all do that.. There's that french cook on FOOD Network that switches to french words all the time.. she annoys a bit too because of that.. I guess its just because I don't understand italian so it doesn't really matter ;)

          Note: Pretty sure Giada was born in Italy..
    • BIOHazard87, on 06/02/2008, -1/+3Anyone agree with me that her voice is a bit annoying? :P
    • enjoiskating811, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1Dugg for the creepy amount of thought you put into that response.
    • Beto0707, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3Yum-O!
    • Hoogs, on 06/03/2008, -1/+1All she needs is a mute button and you're all set.
  • umbriago, on 06/02/2008, -12/+5Rachel Ray is famous? Egads. This is swell, however.
  • honthraj, on 06/02/2008, -62/+220This would have been funny - IF I WAS TWELVE.

    • atgmac, on 06/02/2008, -4/+67Which is why this appeals to digg's main demographic.
    • loneBoat, on 06/02/2008, -3/+73You're not twelve? Why are you commenting on Digg?
    • bearcat8543, on 06/02/2008, -9/+1you fail
    • themoonintheman, on 06/02/2008, -7/+9Your comment would have been good...
      if you were able to use the correct tense of "to be."
      • honthraj, on 06/02/2008, -8/+4I concede. . .

        < sinks humbly to a corner >
      • honthraj, on 06/02/2008, -9/+0I concede

        < sinks humbly to face the corner >
    • caramba420, on 06/02/2008, -1/+17Being a grown-up is overrated.
    • inkswamp, on 06/02/2008, -1/+35... but now that you're 13, you're all mature.
    • espoandy, on 06/03/2008, -1/+2Same exact comment that was said on the "show me your genatails rap." (possibly same person) Lets try to be original.
    • xz9925, on 06/03/2008, -1/+1growing old is inevitable, growing up is an option
  • MadOgre, on 06/02/2008, -10/+69I'd wreck that ***** and have her make me some pie...
  • Brows, on 06/02/2008, -14/+35dumb
    • ColorBlind, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3second that
    • charlietuna, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2I coudn't help but laugh. Yeah dumb, but they got some good clips.
  • PhilMoskowitz, on 06/02/2008, -17/+52and.. we're all 12 years old again.
  • WaRdRivR, on 06/02/2008, -5/+48Those FHM photos were a pleasant surprise!
  • tekiek, on 06/02/2008, -22/+18Hate her then ... hate her now
    • Whackly, on 06/02/2008, -2/+6You only hate her because her vagina is bigger than yours.
  • egeo2000, on 06/02/2008, -3/+11So much better than those 1-900 numbers
  • nvisn, on 06/02/2008, -11/+2Rachael Ray can get this dick.
  • skyfyre, on 06/02/2008, -14/+3I gotta admit....I'm not feeling it. (Heh heh....I said "feeling it." That's funny. I'm funny.)
    Buried.
  • frogstomp19, on 06/02/2008, -16/+7oooh... anyone else catch the hillary avatar?
    http://www.wrhsgoodvibrations.com/rachelray.jpg
    • Coffeedemon, on 06/02/2008, -1/+14Oh my goodness. Get the thought police.
    • ErikHarrison, on 06/02/2008, -5/+1oooohhh so what? If you haven't paid attention Hillary is the democratic nominee?

      /sarcasm
    • moleeyes, on 06/02/2008, -3/+5Oh my goodness. Get the vista police.
    • IHaveIssues, on 06/02/2008, -1/+7So?
  • Mackofalltrades, on 06/02/2008, -4/+101Was I the only one hoping for real porn.
  • nelliedawg82, on 06/02/2008, -9/+19Rachel Ray is a terrible tipper. Please stay away from my restaurant. She has that "I'm going to be fat as a cow look when my metabolism slows."

    • omnithought, on 06/02/2008, -0/+7Don't know why you're being dugg down...you're right. She's a total bitch, leaves little or no tip, and everyone I've heard of who has met her has had nothing good to say. She acts all bubbly when the cameras are rolling, but the second they're off, she's a drunken *****.
    • jserio, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4She's already getting fat. Anyone catch that new Regis show "Million Dollar Answer" on Sunday? Rachael Ray was on it and looks like she gained about 20 pounds since I last saw her TV show. Maybe that's the real reason Dunkin dropped her.
    • marx2k, on 06/02/2008, -3/+3She's also racist. People found out when she got hammered at a restaurant.
      http://icydk.com/2007/01/24/is-rachel-ray-racist-p ...
    • r00tus3r, on 06/02/2008, -2/+1"I'm going to be fat as a cow look when my metabolism slows." ???

      or maybe you mean

      "I'm going to be fat as a cow when my metabolism slows." look
  • orlyfactor, on 06/02/2008, -5/+23Funny, but got old after 30 seconds.
    • MOJIRA, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1I'd agree but the editor was saving some of the good stuff for the end.
  • netzdamon, on 06/02/2008, -4/+83she can even annoy you when giving you a hand job, great.
  • atomicrobot, on 06/02/2008, -4/+8That was freaking hilarious.
  • mwaleed86, on 06/02/2008, -1/+3she actually ate it toawards the end!
  • oilcan, on 06/02/2008, -2/+10who?
    • rex84, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4That what I said. Never heard of her before the whole "terrorist scarf" thing.
      • norbiu, on 06/02/2008, -0/+3I never heard of her, period.
        • rex84, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2Good. The more Americans that kill their televisions, less will be distracted my celebrity fluff "news", and start paying attention to what's really going on.
  • plizard, on 06/02/2008, -13/+7i'd let rachel ray sit on my dick
  • proctorsurf, on 06/02/2008, -14/+1***** thing SuCkS!
  • Conky, on 06/02/2008, -2/+6Put your shoulder into it.
  • JazzClutchkick, on 06/02/2008, -5/+3This is great
  • nicksauce, on 06/02/2008, -9/+2Is this that woman that loves terrorism and hates America? booooooo
  • MalamuteTX, on 06/02/2008, -1/+9There aren't enough of these food show edits. They always say the dirtiest things when taken out of context. Alton Brown next ftw! ;)
    • InstantRamen, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2Alton brown is awesome . Good eats is one of the best shows ever.
  • iceooo3, on 06/02/2008, -1/+2funny stuff!
  • JerzyBricklayr, on 06/02/2008, -11/+6God!... I hate that bitch.
  • scairborn, on 06/02/2008, -8/+3Oh, I see what you did there.
  • DanDotOrg, on 06/02/2008, -3/+41...that's what she said?
    • BlackholeStorm, on 06/02/2008, -3/+1crap, I posted the same thing.
  • wakeb791, on 06/02/2008, -6/+1Old as hell.
    • Vvolf, on 06/02/2008, -0/+1ah DUH! It would have to be old if it was before she was famous...
  • fadetoone, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2I'm sure *someone* heard it before...
  • Thrilltone, on 06/02/2008, -0/+13"Stand back now, I don't want to splatter you!"

    Reminds me of those melons I bought this morning.
    They were small but luscious.
  • readerz, on 06/02/2008, -12/+1mirror please http://freeviralvideos.com/members/action/viewvide ...
    thanks
  • nutniqs, on 06/02/2008, -0/+2ease him out of there...
  • legendxx, on 06/02/2008, -6/+4Another giant step toward digg becoming 4chan
  • yohnstoppable, on 06/02/2008, -16/+52I'm sorry, but I HATE her ***** voice. She sounds like a 93 year old whose smoked her entire life, and is about to die of lung cancer. How is that even remotely attractive? I'd rather listen to Fram Drescher yodel than Rachel Ray talk about anything.
  • ycohain, on 06/02/2008, -1/+5I was so scared for the first 2 seconds and thought to myself that I can't listen to Rachel Ray talk sex...then I realized that it's a spoof and cried hysterically. Awesome.
  • badogg, on 06/02/2008, -1/+10that was funny...

    I don't know how anyone could have sat there and listened to that much of her to make that. I mean she is nice to look at for sure, but man she is annoying when she talks.
    • gmiley, on 06/02/2008, -0/+4That is why God invented ball-gags, it says so right in the Bible.

      Correctly translated:

      "And God said, "Let the earth put forth implements of pleasurable pain, plants yielding fibrous whips , and fruit trees bearing fruit with which shall be used as ball-gags to stifle the horrid screech of Rachel Ray, each according to its kind, upon the earth." And it was so."
      -Genesis 1:11

      See, it says so right there.
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