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Paris Hilton Is Too Beautiful For Jail, Says Paris Hilton

hecklerspray.com — Terrified that her 45-day prison sentence will plunge her into a world of daily beatings, violent shower-room cunnilingus and a total absence of anything that's even vaguely hot, Paris Hilton has started up a petition to keep her out of jail, on the basis that she "provides beauty and excitement" to everyone's lives. (yeah right...)

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  • captainbrian, on 10/12/2007, -6/+814I have to agree with Eric Layne who put it so succinctly: Send That Silly Bitch To Jail!

    • Condottieri, on 10/12/2007, -8/+496If anyone needs a reality check, it's her.
    • doctorfungi, on 10/12/2007, -38/+365This is harsh, I know. But I really hope she gets shanked while she's in there.
    • Lixie, on 10/12/2007, -6/+553She's "rich trash". The only thing she provides to society is what to avoid becoming.
    • tizz66, on 10/12/2007, -38/+83I think it's only fair to point out she didn't make this petition or choose the wording in it - although she does support it (obviously...). The story is inaccurate or misleading in that respect.
    • WarpFox, on 10/12/2007, -9/+547The Simple Life: Guantanamo Bay
    • burkewendt, on 10/12/2007, -5/+321She broke the law and she must pay the consequences, its as simple as that... Why should she get special treatment? Because her grandfather made a profitable hotel chain? That makes no sense
    • asauterChicago, on 10/12/2007, -4/+373Will someone please start a "Keep Paris Hilton in Jail" petition? PLEASE...I would, but I'm too busy with work to start one...
    • cawpin, on 10/12/2007, -7/+442Dugg just for getting "cunnilingus" on the front page.
    • jsg7, on 10/12/2007, -2/+274Prisons need more beauty and excitement... extend her sentence...
    • LovingDigg, on 10/12/2007, -18/+44I want to see a gangbang in that prison, Paris would love it... host in on the inter-nets!!
    • artisresistance, on 10/12/2007, -2/+195"She provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives…"
      Her existence offers nothing...It's shallow, boring, and pathetic. Her lame-ass fans and the (tabloid) media make it seem exciting. It's an illusion.

      "The Paris Hilton jail petition has so far received over 10,000 signatures which, although impressive, probably won't stop Paris Hilton from going to the big house"
      10,000 signatures is hardly impressive. How many signatures can digg get together in support of her 45 day sentence? I'm sure hundreds of thousands.
    • custal, on 10/12/2007, -18/+183asauterChicago wrote: Will someone please start a "Keep Paris Hilton in Jail" petition?

      Already done: http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/nomercy4paris/
    • Grumps, on 10/12/2007, -3/+52Its true that law only applies to poor people without status. Even if shes serving 45 days, she'll be in a 5 star unit. Reality sucks.
    • Zippo, on 10/12/2007, -1/+68This brainless ditz needs a good dose of reality. It was bad enough that she was drinking and driving (which is what got her a $1500 fine and 36 months probation), but she was caught speeding (and without her headlights on), driving with a suspended license, and she had failed to enroll in a court-ordered alcohol education program.

      Sorry honey, but just because you're filthy rich and have a good body doesn't mean you're above the law. Besides, the only "excitement" you've ever brought to this world was that sex tape. Now that everyone's seen that and moved on, you're just a rich bimbo again.
    • Phaedruss, on 10/12/2007, -1/+152You could sign the petition to keep her in jail that has < 50 signatures, or the one that has almost 40,000:

      http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/jailparishilton/index.html
    • sepharious, on 10/12/2007, -13/+1@asauterChicago
      SECONDED!

      @custal
      thank you for your valuable services ;)
    • basichuman, on 10/12/2007, -6/+92@asauterChicago

      Someone did create a petition. Now has almost 39,000 signatures. It may not make a difference but it would be fun to see what happens when the Digg community gets a hold of it.
      http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/jailparishilton/signatures.html

      Edit: Looks like sepharious beat me to it. Go ahead and digg me down.
    • dclowd9901, on 10/12/2007, -2/+20"This is harsh, I know. But I really hope she gets shanked while she's in there."

      I certainly don't hope that happens, but I really want her to be put in her place, and, at the very least, understand that she isn't anything but a ***** stain on the long cord of history and time, and hope she maybe comes out of this with a little humility. Any humility for her would be an enormous step forward.
    • wannymahoots, on 10/12/2007, -1/+15She'll be worn like a glove puppet.
    • LogicBomB, on 10/12/2007, -2/+51As one of the ugliest celeb's out there in my opinion, this is the weakest excuse yet!
    • skyshock21, on 10/12/2007, -13/+32***** Paris Hilton. No one should even care enough one way or another whether she goes to jail.

      However...

      SEND OJ SIMPSON TO JAIL!!!!!
    • meshgiath, on 10/12/2007, -2/+83petition signed, comment made:

      Things that DO NOT exempt a person from being jailed:
      1) your father created a business that makes loads of cash annually
      2) you are under the impression that you provide some service to society (outside of homemade porn)
      3) you personally THINK you're too good for jail.

      Paris needs to go to prison strictly because she is the embodiment of what is bringing america down. In her own head, as projected by her actions, she is more important than anyone else. i.e. she lives in her own world, not in the reality God placed her in.
      If America is to survive, this mentality of "I am what I think I am" must die.
      Jail Paris Hilton because she broke the law. Make an example out of her, because if you do not, the example that will be made will be that of a broken justice system wherein laws mean nothing when money is involved.
    • nottidredd, on 10/12/2007, -12/+4I hope they do a reality show on it...i'd watch
    • asauterChicago, on 10/12/2007, -4/+14@er... everyone that gave a link to the existing petition:

      It was submitted to digg a day ago, but has hardly any diggs (I didn't submit it):

      http://digg.com/celebrity/Jail_Paris_Hilton_Petition

      digg it up and get more diggers on this petition :-)!
    • R34C7, on 10/12/2007, -9/+4edit: nevermind...
    • professorChaos, on 10/12/2007, -16/+2@ R34C7

      you don't have to pay it says on top thanks now will you please donate?


      god your stupid
    • jun2san, on 10/12/2007, -1/+13Did she really speak in third person?
    • DrMonkeyLove, on 10/12/2007, -4/+57"SEND OJ SIMPSON TO JAIL!!!!!"

      No, send OJ to Paris Hilton's house. We all know how he treats white women. THEN send him to jail.
    • XtremeBug, on 10/12/2007, -2/+5@R34C7:

      You don't have to pay to sign the petition. I signed it, and didn't have to spend a dime. All they ask, is for a donation AFTER you submit your signature. From there, you can just exit and it'll still count.

      (edit) damn, ProfessorChaos beat me.
    • sponeil, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1@doctorfungi

      I hope the guards video-tape it and put it on the Internet. ;-)
    • po43292, on 10/12/2007, -0/+5I don't think you can just "petition to not go to jail". It's called a legal system, and petitions don't even work online...

      Apparently the Simple Life taught her nothing.
    • IbnDigg, on 10/12/2007, -2/+48PETITIONS:
      In ipetitions top five list, all five petitions are about the p.hilton.

      TWO are for jailing hilton
      http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/jailparishilton (Signatures 39,819 )
      http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/DN_FREE_PARIS (Signatures 8,378)

      THREE for "freeing" hilton.
      http://no.URL.just.incase.an.idiot.wants.to.sign.it (Signatures 19,828)
      http://no.URL.just.incase.an.idiot.wants.to.sign.it (Signatures 5,693)
      http://no.URL.just.incase.an.idiot.wants.to.sign.it (Signatures 2,345)

      Thats 48,197 vs 27,866 idiots
    • Fhwqhgads, on 10/12/2007, -2/+1http://www.hammeruncut.com/do-the-rich-and-famous-deserve-special-treatment/
    • artisresistance, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4@linkedlist

      basichuman wrote:
      "Someone did create a petition. Now has almost 39,000 signatures. It may not make a difference but it would be fun to see what happens when the Digg community gets a hold of it.
      http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/jailparishilton/signatures.html"

      This is what I meant to convey.
    • newspimp, on 10/12/2007, -10/+0My own little creations : hope it's not too self-aggrandizing for you guys and girls...

      http://www.cafepress.com/jailparisnow
      http://www.cafepress.com/45daysandnights
    • DildoOreilly, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3Surri's golden poop sculpture is more significant than the life of Paris Hilton.
    • nonpareil, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1http://digg.com/celebrity/No_Clemency_For_Paris_Hilton_Petition
    • AwesomeMonster, on 10/12/2007, -4/+1Why is she so afraid, shes basically going to go a nice little resort prison, complete with golf course and swimming pool. Oh thats right, shes a greedy, attention whoring, nymphomaniac. NO guys, press or money there.
    • raynar, on 10/12/2007, -4/+3I hope she gets her ass pokered with a chairleg.
    • voidvox0, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3@ grumps and linkedlist: i believe it was a stipulation by the judge that she has to go to a regular prison not one of those 5 star deals.
    • axxxul, on 10/12/2007, -3/+2Well, you've got to admit: spending time in prison is not as fun as spending 1 night in Paris!
    • SupaFupa, on 10/12/2007, -0/+341. You became pseudo-famous partly because of your lineage, but mostly because of your vagina and non-existent breasts.

      2. You have the work ethic that makes George W. Bush's look good.

      3. You have 0 talent beyond the ability to make people feel better because they're not as stupid as you.

      4. You contribute nothing to society, in fact you are a detriment by giving hope to young women that intelligence matters none, and that 6'4, 105lbs, and oblivious to most of the world around you is a something to strive for.

      5. You are eye candy that is used as a distraction from important news. This will never change.

      6. Since nothing you do is actually important at all, a drunk driving conviction will never impede your ability to work.

      All that being said, you are a United States citizen, you broke the law, a second time, whilst on probation. How many chances do they give you in la la land?

      Paris, here, of all junctions of your life, is your chance to truly fulfill what you say is your goal: to help young women. Grow up, go to jail, and prove to us all that you actually do care about anyone else but yourself and this months dog. Prove that you grasp this small concept of normal human life.
    • TCKC2C, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2Zippo: "a good body"

      !!!
    • takeda, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10Is there a petition somewhere to extend her sentence?
    • Mortred, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2@Custal

      "asauterChicago wrote: Will someone please start a "Keep Paris Hilton in Jail" petition?

      Already done: http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/nomercy4paris/"

      Is there any way to see how many have signed the petition ?
    • TaterSalad77, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2over 20k have signed this one http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/PH21781/ . click signatures...
    • mklint000, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6She's going to end up writing a book about this "horrific" time of her life and make a load of cash off of it. And when I say write a book, I mean that she will blather on to a writer for a couple of days and the writer will "translate" her aol speak.
    • Scarfy, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1@ Condottieri

      I accidentally dugg you down... now I'm sad.
    • swordedge, on 10/12/2007, -2/+3Paris Hilton is flapping her butt cheeks again!
    • stisev, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4Don't you guys see -- you're giving her EXACTLY what she wants -- and that's free media.
      That's why she originally uploaded the sex video.

      All you guys are falling right into her scheme. Morons.
    • Rekzai, on 10/12/2007, -4/+2id hit it
    • hdtvdust, on 10/12/2007, -4/+1artisresistance...hundreds of thousands? Wow. You are SERIOUSLY delusional about the size of Digg.
    • rhesuspieces00, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7has someone started a petition to extend her sentence indefinitely?
    • AWeeBitInsane, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2"Paris Hilton Is Too Beautiful For Jail, Says Paris Hilton"

      Crazy talk. We all know prisons are correctional institutions that make you a better person and protect you while you're there.
    • CharlieBrown72, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Yes she deserves to go and she is not going to one of those 5 star prison she is going to the county jail and in LA those are over crowded and not the nicest place to spend a month and a half.
    • tuxuser, on 10/12/2007, -8/+1free paris hiltion!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    • Aliarse, on 10/12/2007, -5/+2@custal (#6614472)
      I'm not paying two ***** dollars to vote on a damn petition.

      Cheeky bastards.
    • Sneezyx, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Nice try, petitioners, but e-petitions aren't worth the paper they're not printed on:

      http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/petition/internet.asp
    • Aliarse, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1@Rekzai (#6620095) said: "id hit it"
      Me too.

      With a spade, a baseball bat, a hammer, an axe, and last but not least, a 1 ton anvil.
    • MacBastard, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1BRING BACK THE GUILLOTINE!

      Let's kick off the revolution by chopping off the head of America's "Marie Antoinette".

      It'll get the ball rolling, so to speak.....

      The Bastard
    • NSResponder, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2"Its true that law only applies to poor people without status."

      That's what Leona Helmsley thought. Didn't turn out to be the case.

      -jcr

    • Lux7, on 10/12/2007, -1/+8Am I the only one who thinks she's hideous?
    • sepultura, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Looks like she's getting death treats now: http://www.digg.com/celebrity/Paris_Hilton_Gets_Her_Inevitable_Prison_Death_Threats
    • undersky, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1buried as incorrect. the jail already said that they will keep her (like other high profile inmate) in a separate part with non-violent inmate. meaning she will never experience the horror that we peasants expose when we end up there.
    • Morphinity, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1This just in, Paris Hilton will star in the next season of Prison Break.
    • Elranzer, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2That's hot.
    • webcure, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Isn't it time we show a LITTLE COMPASSION for a person in their very real moment of despaair...

      http://digg.com/health/Paris_is_Going_to_Jail_One_More_Round_Before_I_Go_Johnny/blog

      Be Healthy,
      webcure
    • Hilton, on 10/11/2007, -0/+1Agreed. STFU Paris Hilton.
  • HokieMike, on 10/12/2007, -3/+144"Too stupid for the real world" is more like it.
    • orientis, on 10/12/2007, -21/+1...
    • LogicBomB, on 10/12/2007, -7/+1Awesome.
    • mageofdeath, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4sry for the comment abuse, but here's the follow up story that talks about her getting threats from the inmates...
      http://www.hecklerspray.com/paris-hiltons-prison-death-threats-come-bang-on-time/20078268.php#more-8268
    • SuperCUBE, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Welcome to society, Paris.
    • Notclevr, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Interestingly, my friend went to a reform school in California with her (and a lot of other children of the rich & famous) when they were in high school. He says you could tell she was really stuck-up so he never really talked to her, but that a total dirtbag friend/acquaintance of his apparently got a bj from her at some point. She also looked quite different back then.

      But what's interesting is that this reform school was apparently no joke. Forced labor, strict curfews/lockdowns, etc. Even the harshest reform school for the rich & famous is probably better than prison, but my friend was very scarred by his time there, and he's a pretty rough dude.
  • IvanB, on 10/12/2007, -5/+95I hope she drops the soap and pays for her toilet paper the hard way.
    • Cruelapollo, on 10/12/2007, -2/+54I'm sure she's used to it.
    • aspec, on 10/12/2007, -1/+39Dude, I think dropping soap is a male prison thing... I don't think they're quite as limited in a women's prison.
    • Hexogen, on 10/12/2007, -4/+68She could always get anally fisted.
    • orientis, on 10/12/2007, -1/+136Thank you Hexogen, for reminding us that there is always the anal fisting option. In today's hustle-bustle world we often forget that.
    • DildoOreilly, on 10/12/2007, -1/+13I don't care if the bitch is in jail, just keep the drunk skank off the road!!
    • CaptainJack69, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0Aye matee, and ya hope they have cameras in there, too, streaming this to the net 24/7, because this is the only way Paris could make anything worth watching and reading about.... Permission to board... So-to-speak!
  • LGFAlbatross, on 10/12/2007, -1/+183If she wanted a bit of leniency, she would have shown up for court on time.
    • goeatsmsht, on 10/12/2007, -2/+107but she was to busy being "beautiful and exciting"

      /sarcasm
    • Lixie, on 10/12/2007, -2/+50She had to be fashionably late, you know, because she's "busy" with other court dates
    • chicaneuk, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1I find her justification for avoiding a spell in prison.

      I can reassure anyone reading that she does not enlighten MY life with her shallow, vacuous, and slutty carryings on. Oh to be able to live off mummy and daddy's fortune, to be able to buy yourself Mercedes McLaren SLR's and Bentley Continentals. I think a trip down reality street, to show her that she's not above the law is going to do her the world of good.

      Do not pass go. Go directly to jail.
  • MabuShisler, on 10/12/2007, -14/+8http://digg.com/celebrity/Send_Paris_Hilton_to_Jail_2
    Here's a petition to show what we really think about her highness of skankiness..
    • therightclique, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1you are a dick. read the board before posting something that has been posted many times before.
  • Synthos, on 10/12/2007, -4/+109You break the law... You go to jail.
    Learn how some people live, bitch.
  • nblsavage, on 10/12/2007, -5/+71hate to destroy your prison rape fantasies but being a celeb, Paris will most likely get a private cell and be isolated from the rest of the jail's population.
    • linkin1, on 10/12/2007, -3/+39then it's not a jail is it? the whole point is to teach her a lesson..seems like she is just going to a hilton hotel.
    • lieutenantmudd, on 10/12/2007, -0/+28Well yes and no. If the prison can't provide reasonable security to someone in the general population, they should be kept separate. This is a women's prison I assume so I don't know the risk.

      But in Men's prisons, this kindof thing happens all the time. For example, a pedophile in general population of a men's prison will be killed. Prisons keep them separate to keep them safe.
    • RobertPatrick, on 10/12/2007, -4/+29I hope she'll be alone in a cell, nobody wants jail to become a herpes factory.
    • Zippo, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10She'll end up in a minimum-security detention centre, just like Martha Stewart did. She's not a hardened thug, so of course she won't see much of the stereotypical "jail culture". Besides, she's only going away for 45 days... All-in-all, this is practically a slap on the wrist.

      Hopefully she'll be at least *somewhat* humbled by jail. She could certainly use a bit of time away from the lap of luxury... The Simple Life doesn't count... she likely had a huge private trailer somewhere down the road.
    • sexybobo, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0@nblsavage
      By private cell and isolation i hope you mean she will be put in solitary confinement.
      Actually nvm she is all ready crazy enough with out spending 45 days in solitary. in the end i hope she looses some of her freedoms for 45 days. I am willing to bet this is the first time she has ever been punished. shame it is costing tax payers money to do it instead of her parents saying no when she was a kid. might do her some good.
    • rnelsonee, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1Check out the earlier digg article on the pay-as-you-go jails in CA. Her cell will have an unlocked door with no bars on it, and she'll be able to eat food bought in by friends. She will most likely have WiFi and cable. The chances of her doing 'hard' time are nil.

      The only satisfaction I get is that for her, because of her absurd life she's led so far, she's set herself up so that 45 days in a nice jail is more mentally taxing and damaging than real jail is for most people.
    • hetherkae, on 10/12/2007, -2/+0Yes, I heard on Dennis Miller that she will be isolated from general population and the one she can go to will have 3 different colors of jumpsuits to pick from. WTF. She won't humble, she'll become more famous somehow from the "tormentingly unfair" outcome, and we will suffer hearing about it on a daily basis ... or ... I'm not staying optimistic enough to rule out that it still won't happen.
    • Sabarok, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2@melsonee
      The judge explicitly forbade her from using one of those jails in his sentence
  • lieutenantmudd, on 10/12/2007, -1/+27Celebrities are kept in separate populations to avoid specifically what she is worried about. Cops, pedophiles, and celebrities are rarely kept in the general population because they are afraid of them being targeted.
    • Pimpalicious316, on 10/12/2007, -11/+23i really don't understand that mentality. let's punish them, but also give them special treatment. they were dumb/mindless enough to commit a crime, and in some cases commit ANOTHER one, and now they don't think they are responsible for their actions and deserve a lesser punishment? ***** them and ***** the 10,000 people that signed her worthless ***** petition. if she had just accepted her sentence, served it quietly and without making a huge ***** scene, this wouldn't be a big deal in 6 months. but now everyone knows how much of a prissy bitch she really is, and she can't undo that.

      ***** SPECIAL TREATMENT OF CELEBRITIES.

      /rant
    • combatchuck, on 10/12/2007, -3/+19They don't treat celebrities special because of their status. It's because everybody else is ***** nuts. Celebrities don't hound themselves with constant camera flashes, or stalk themselves, or send death threats/marriage proposals to themselves. It's not the prison's only job to separate these people from society -- because that's what prison is for, not punishment. It's also responsible for making sure the ones who are supposed to get out alive actually get out alive. Celebrities are targets because they are famous. Cops are targets because ... duh. Child abusers and killers are targets because they are the lowest rung of the food chain in prison.
    • logicalnoise, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4even seperated from gen pop jail can be hell. SHe will indeed have to sit there and think about why she's there for 23 straight days with little communication and I doubt any friends.
    • spudnic, on 10/12/2007, -1/+5@lieutenantmudd (#6613465)
      The punishment is being deprived of your freedom, not what other inmates might do to you
  • tinkafoo, on 10/12/2007, -3/+41"Hey Ms. Hilton, you have the right to remain silent. I suggest you do it."
    • aposter, on 10/12/2007, -1/+9Forever? We couldn't be THAT damn lucky.
  • psukardi, on 10/12/2007, -24/+2I don't even know why she is complaining.

    The prison system is so over crowded she won't even serve 45 days behind bars. She will be issolated from everyone else, so she's not going to have to worry about someone wanting her corn bread. She will get treated very well by guards in fear of a law-suit. Heck, the only punishment will be her not having anyone to complain to and some crappy food and a ***** bed to sleep on.

    She needs to just get it over with already..

    http://www.FireJayPa.com --> Your home for PSU sports && much more
  • kidvicious1973, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4Does everyone get the same sentence? As long as the judge wasn't extra harsh cause he is a anti-Paris, I say let her do the time. Braek the rules, you paya price regardless of who you are.
    • therightclique, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1that just isn't accurate. famous people NEVER have to pay the same price normal people do.
  • crugg, on 10/12/2007, -3/+7Lies! Have you seen her lazy eye. That she tries to hide.
    • laserblazer, on 10/12/2007, -5/+3All that money and she never had that fixed. Weird.
    • stratdog25, on 10/12/2007, -1/+45Thats why the guy in the video broke up with her... she was "seeing someone else on the side"

      Is that how her teaching career ended? she "couldnt keep her pupils straight?"
    • bikini, on 10/12/2007, -2/+7ZING!
    • ashmodai, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3@crugg
      You mean the brown one, it is neither lazy nor very well hidden in my opinion...
    • coldskool, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2Dude... there is no hiding that lazy eye... she looks like that beast thats chained to the basement in the Goonies..
  • josegutz, on 10/12/2007, -18/+2This is a great example to all the rich and glitsy Hassafrass in BallaWood... Even if you are a balla and run in the best of circles, you will pay one day...There is still Justice in this world and this gives me hope... (looks up to the sky).
    • orientis, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Balla? Hassafrass? You done talk funny.
    • YagLana, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3What the hell? Were you trying to be poetic?
  • tagnarth, on 10/12/2007, -2/+12While I don't like Paris and think she embodies all that's wrong in female role models these days, this post is mostly false. She released a statement yesterday saying she's not trying to get out of this, broke the law and is willing to do her time. This was on ET Canada last night (backgound noise while I worked) These petitions are started by her fans.

    The only thing I can say is I wonder when the new video will be leaked
  • Karyyk, on 10/12/2007, -2/+49Where's the petition to keep her there past 45 days? That's what I'm talking about...
    • josegutz, on 10/12/2007, -2/+8I vote for 2 years in jail...That will get her tatooed and pumped (she's already been plenty of times) I mean pumped up....and maybe she'll get some meat on her skinny bones. They make you eat in prison...You don't have a choice of what to eat.
  • dominiccarr, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1If jail smacks some sense into her the i say go for it! Although i'd much rather she was banned from ever appearing on TV or appearing anywhere for that matter.
  • Freeskier, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6I say let her rot in jail
  • frostieDude, on 10/12/2007, -0/+32I can't put my finger on exactly why, but I don't think she is all that good looking.
    • laserblazer, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6I hear that. I usually have a major soft-spot for blond women, but she loves herself more than I ever could and she likes it that way.
    • opinionation, on 10/12/2007, -10/+2agreed, ide shave her ass and teach her to walk backwards if she was my dog...
    • mccrusc, on 10/12/2007, -4/+1I could tolerate her until the breast surgery-- now she's lost her last shred of humility, but I still think those Hardee's commercials were hilarious.
    • Zippo, on 10/12/2007, -2/+10Sure she's "beautiful" on the outside... but her personality is about as beautiful as a rusty cheese grater. At least, that's what it feels like when she talks.
    • pauleric, on 10/12/2007, -1/+10Because she has a square-jawed man-face. She's young and skinny, and compared to your average everyday woman she's reasonably good looking. But compared to other celebrities (pick your favorite), she's hideous. Without makeup and hair styling, she'd look like...well here she is as a pre-op transvestite:
      http://www.parislatsis.net/images/pictures/paris_hilton_nipple_slip_01.jpg
    • pauleric, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1...oops
    • xtinxkanx, on 10/12/2007, -1/+1All i can say is that someone beat her with an ugly stick when she was born.
  • shunpike, on 10/12/2007, -3/+11DOUBLE HER SENTENCE!!!
  • hornfinger, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Too hot for jail?
    That scrawny bird-faced slag deserves a spell in ''choky', if you ask me.
    • refreshments, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Is that...

      Is that a "Matilda" reference.

      My God, man.

      Thank you for my daily smile.
  • snotrokit, on 10/12/2007, -1/+27send that useless bitch to jail. The worst part is she won't even see general population, which for her own safety, is a good thing. I think they need to let her into general pop for a few hours a day.

    serious wake up call.

    break the law, go to jail. I really could give 2 ***** about how pampered or pretty (not in my eyes) she is. Iron bar motel bitch.
  • troyounces, on 10/12/2007, -51/+9Why are so many people on here so mean-spirited? I think Paris maybe deserves a bit of jail time, but I don't see why that makes her a bitch. I think some of you guys are just ***** off that hot girls never gave you the time of day. She may end up spending a few days in jail, but you'll probably still be a loser living in your moms basement.
    • laserblazer, on 10/12/2007, -4/+36She's not going to ***** you, chump. She's never going to ***** you.

      Also, speaking of losers - defending a debauched gutter-skank on Digg isn't winning material.
    • alienfubar, on 10/12/2007, -3/+36I don't know what you have been smoking; paris hilton is NOT hot.
    • mattmcm, on 10/12/2007, -4/+5It's probably the whole "I'm too beautiful for jail" thing. You commit a crime, tough ***** - you're going to jail, no matter how "good" you look.

      Shouldn't you be elsewhere brainstorming ways to get her out early?
    • RealityCheque, on 10/12/2007, -27/+0They are just mad because they are virgins who JO to her in the shower and want to look cool because it is the "in" thing to say that Paris Hilton is ugly. Just ignore them and let them think people care about what they have to say.
    • cryolyte, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6"Why are so many people on here so mean-spirited?
      Because we are sick of seeing people with money live above the law.

      "I think Paris maybe deserves a bit of jail time, but I don't see why that makes her a bitch."
      I'll disregard the fact that you said "maybe", and just retort that no one really said that she was a bitch BECAUSE of breaking the law. Speaking for myself, I think she's a bitch because she thinks the world revolves around her.

      "I think some of you guys are just ***** off that hot girls never gave you the time of day. "
      Apparently, you're a bitch too. Plz get over yourself.

      "She may end up spending a few days in jail, but you'll probably still be a loser living in your moms basement."
      Living in your mom's basement does not make you a loser. Not understanding how society works, making unfounded judgement calls, and supporting the outrageous behavior of a whiny heiress, does however.
    • RealityCheque, on 10/12/2007, -5/+0LOOK! ANOTHER WHINY NERD PUSSY CRYING! HAHAHA!
  • Codename, on 10/12/2007, -1/+51Dude she's so skinny she could just slide through the jail cell.
  • beautifuloneboo, on 10/12/2007, -108/+2Ahhh, I Know I'm Going Against The Majority, But Hell, I Think Paris Is Funny, I Mean Really, U Don't See Many People Going To Jail That Long For Driving On A Suspended Liscense!!! To Be Realistic, Our Jails Are Overcrowded And Costs The Taxpayers Alot Of Dough! Just Look At That Pimp Snoop Dog Gettin' Away With Violations Of Weapons, Weed, Fights In the London Airports... U Could Hardly Say That Paris Deserves 45 Days In The Slammer! Comon' Even If Ya'all Haters Are That Jealous Of Her Fame & Fortune... I Say ...." Let Paris Go Free " ! Ya'all Should Know That Jail Time WILL NOT Make Someone Into A Different Person. You Go There And Find Out.
    • alienfubar, on 10/12/2007, -3/+44Dude, I'm just going to have to bury you just for the freaky Capitalized Letters In Every Word. I couldn't read the paragraph at all, and I'm in no way a grammar nazi.
    • mattmcm, on 10/12/2007, -2/+34God damn. I was digging you down based solely on the fact you like Capitalising Every Word, but I read the crap you wrote, and that's worth an extra digg-down.
    • tomz17, on 10/12/2007, -3/+35Either your caps lock key broken in a very interesting fashion, or you are really as retarded as your post implies.
    • 40hands, on 10/12/2007, -2/+9wow. I mean really.. you cannot be serious.

      If you are then I can see why you would think she should go free.
    • CaseyUCF, on 10/12/2007, -4/+8thanks for capitalizing every word there asshole
    • turbod33, on 10/12/2007, -2/+16Let's Capitalize Every Word In The Sentence. That Will Make My Rant Very Easy To Read. You Might As Well Just Go For All Caps.
    • combatchuck, on 10/12/2007, -6/+15wow... your pinky must get tired after a long post. I'm going to do something just as ridiculous, just for effect. i'M gOing tO dIgg yOu dOwn bEcause i cOuldn't rEad yOur pOst aT aLl. aLso, pAris dEserves wHatever tHe lAw sAys sHe sHould gEt, rEgardless oF hOw mUch mOney sHe hAs.
    • RealityCheque, on 10/12/2007, -4/+24Wow, let's respond nine different times to point out the same thing!
    • onesidedsquare, on 10/12/2007, -2/+4what are you? some sort of left over tranny from myspace?
    • ElbridgeGerry, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Let's Capitalize Everything And Defend Celebrities Like Some Sort Of Ten Year Old Girl Just Learning To Type!!!
    • gonerogue, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0What the hell? Did you bind your spacebar to double as a shift key?
  • KD4NED, on 10/12/2007, -5/+6At the risk of sounding harsh, and possibly being called as flamebait, I am going to ask:

    Did she not consider this issue before she made the decision to commit the crime?

    Seems to me that if one did not want to be subjected to the conditions of prison, then one would make an effort to not commit a crime. Simple as that. (I do realize that some people may be wrongly imprisoned, and that's beyond their control, but the majority of people are there for a reason.)
  • BrainCoder, on 10/12/2007, -2/+2"Too Beautiful"? Is it possible to say it in English?
  • robdowns, on 10/12/2007, -12/+2buried as inaccurate.
  • dgh1973, on 10/12/2007, -3/+6She sure does have a purty mouth.

    Not.
  • TonksKC, on 10/12/2007, -1/+2Am I the only one just waiting for her mugshot to appear in the tabloids? I could use a laugh like that.

    Sounds like her little petition is going nowhere. Looks like she gets to bring beauty and excitement to her inmate's lives as well.
  • Elliuotatar, on 10/12/2007, -4/+12Are they gonna strip search her? Cause that would be hot. If she was hot. Which she's not.
  • wardy22, on 10/12/2007, -0/+4It is not truly a matter of being mean spirited, the true point is due to the fact that she is rich, she is getting a much reduced sentence. Had anyone else violated their probation they would have gotten more than 45 days and it wouldn’t be on Digg or anywhere else.
    • catalysis, on 10/12/2007, -3/+1Are you kidding me? A first time probation violation is rarely a jailable offense. She is being made an example of and the judge is a fundamentalist christian. I'm all for people being punished, but 45 days in the clink is not a light sentence by any means of the imagination. We are slowly beginning to jail people for victimless crimes that were unheard of 20 years ago. Be careful what you wish for.
  • locoleo, on 10/12/2007, -11/+5I hope she dies.
  • Nodaki, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2She is going off to some city jail from what I read. She is lucky she wont be in general population in L.A. County (not fun).
  • Jiffylush, on 10/12/2007, -0/+12I am also too beautiful for prison.

    That is what I am going to tell the cops when they come to arrest me.
  • cryptomystic, on 10/12/2007, -2/+17Who she is kidding? she is an ugly person inside and outside.
  • laskuh, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1838,000 and counting:

    http://digg.com/celebrity/Sign_the_petition_to_SEND_Paris_to_jail

    i know theres a petition posted earlier, but this one is on a roll!
  • Razster, on 10/12/2007, -1/+12Every-time I think of Paris Hilton, I recall the Southpark episode of her coughing up white *****.
    • beardsauce, on 10/12/2007, -2/+8I'm pretty sure that "white *****" was semen. From penises. I believe that one could feed baby birds in such a manner, actually.
  • STKD, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7Well I for one will feel far safer and more secure knowing Paris is behind bars. If they happen to lose the key... well, I'd take that as a kindness.
  • DeFex, on 10/12/2007, -2/+13Send the trout faced slapper to jail!.
  • STKD, on 10/12/2007, -6/+1Stupid firefox refresh something something...
  • HyperDav, on 10/12/2007, -0/+20I challenge the argument that she is beautiful at all. She looks like a rat. Shes a butter-face.
    • jgzman, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6I feel that butter-face is giving her too much credit.
  • mazdagirluk, on 10/12/2007, -1/+16beautiful? With that hook nose (showing too many nose jobs)?

    She probably thinks she is too beautiful to work, too.
  • 350Zed, on 10/12/2007, -1/+4She's afraid of being her usual whore-self in a place that doesn't allow videocameras and camera phones.
  • peranadigital, on 10/12/2007, -1/+9I remember a few years ago, I'd never heard of this retarded bitch. My world was better then.

    How these rich celebrities come to the conclusion that they're special because they have money and strangers know their name astounds me. She doesn't even realise that she's basically begging to be put away now. No judge is going to let her off after this idiocy.
  • beautifuloneboo, on 10/12/2007, -16/+1Sounds like alot of ya need to go and take care of yourselves...I mean really, look as Paris as a mirror to yourselves, like it or not.
    • qazyhoods, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2@beautifuloneboo: at least i don't have a lazy eye and a big nose
  • BananaAmbush, on 10/12/2007, -1/+8Anyone who believes she is 'beautiful' should be serving time along side her.
  • adamclif, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3I'm all for her 45 days in jail...and the shower cunnilingus.
  • onesidedsquare, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6i wish it was for 45 years and not days
    so that her media appearances will stop effecting the price of oil
  • RootDogg, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1She should have thought about all this before she broke the law.. tut tut! I ain't signing nowt!
  • face05, on 10/12/2007, -1/+3Wasn't there video tapes of her making racist comments towards Asians and African Americans?
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