What is Digg?65 Comments
- xaaronreevesx, on 10/12/2007, -9/+66"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. - George Burns"
- ilovemusic, on 10/12/2007, -5/+48"My girlfriend always laughs during sex --no matter what she's reading." Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)
Why does this not surprise me... - UFOcool23, on 10/12/2007, -3/+36"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." - Sharon Stone
Men always have to one up the other person, no matter what the situation - in2thel2ain, on 10/12/2007, -6/+39When you are old, sex with viagra is like doing the tour de france with steroids...you're not proud of it, but it's just something that needs to be done.
- zephc, on 10/12/2007, -0/+32Sex as the metaphor, instead of another metaphor about sex:
“Software is like sex: it's better when it's free.” - Linux creator Linus Torvalds - theOster, on 10/31/2007, -1/+31sex is like air - it's only important when you're not getting any
- DrDabbles, on 10/12/2007, -6/+30I see the fanboi logic just hit a divide-by-zero problem.
1. Steve is perfect. 2. Steve is always right. 3. Steve stakes claim he sucks in bed.
If steve == "always right" and steve == "crap-in-the-sack" THEN
steve = "not perfect";
printf "Laugh at the fanboi";
endif - buddychrist001, on 10/12/2007, -0/+23copy and pasted sorry but i thought it was funny
"got it here it goes:
At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 20 success is . . . having sex.
At age 35 success is . . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . . having money.
At age 60 success is . . . having sex.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants." - ICSU, on 10/12/2007, -1/+23"Well, thanks to the Internet, I'm now bored with sex.
They're like sex, except I'm having them!"
[about to serve his sentence of being sexed to death] Goodbye, friends. I never thought I'd die like this. But I always really, really hoped."
Philip J. Fry - Dundasbro, on 10/12/2007, -4/+25And you have the crabs to prove it.
- onboleman, on 10/12/2007, -0/+19The Steve Jobs one is actually from the comedian, Emo Phillips.
According to Wikiquote. - DougO, on 10/12/2007, -0/+19Safe Sex in New Zealand is putting an X on the back of the sheep known to kick!
- Nickatnite101, on 10/12/2007, -4/+23An old man once told me that when your old it's like trying to squeeze a marsh mellow through a straw.....
- dAbReAkA, on 10/12/2007, -5/+23"Saying that Java is cool because it works on different environments is like saying that anal sex is cool because it works on different genders!" ;)
- cuoops, on 10/12/2007, -1/+17classic - When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, "No ... he's dead.''
- benijuana, on 10/12/2007, -1/+17Louis CK's got a good one
"here's the thing, as far as sex... for guys we just need the release. Thats all it is, we just need it. For women it's like an emotional thing... we need to cum just 'cause we need to. Women, they get into it, and then they shiver and lie on your side and cry after and all that kinda *****. But for guys it's just something that we need to do so that we won't murder people! Thats all it is, really, just maintanence. The city should have a red tag on the dig that has a PSI level thats unacceptable." - inactive, on 11/14/2007, -1/+17Aaaaargh! The Phantom Joke Explainer has returned! Quick - let's all pretend we haven't seen him!
- benijuana, on 10/12/2007, -0/+15Heres the Worst Handjob Ever clip if anyone hasn't seen his standup... very funny guy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWhSfln1O4k - xtmno3, on 10/12/2007, -0/+14Man, Emo sure got the shaft for a first name in today's society.
- sogracefully, on 10/12/2007, -0/+13not too sure what jack nicholson's quote about his mother has to do with sex... on second thought, better leave that one alone.
- 3wiid, on 10/12/2007, -1/+13You hear so much about how hard it is to get sex in the first place and then how hard it is to put in a good performance.
No one ever explains how to fart silently when you wake up next to your girl in the morning! - Methodius, on 10/12/2007, -0/+7Everything of importance has been said before by somebody who did not discover it.
-Alfred North Whitehead
It's next to impossible that anything you say hasn't been said before. I just did it right then, too. Get over it, old stuff will come back from time to time. - hokeywebb22, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Woody Allen
I laughed so hard at that I woke up my roommate in the other room at 4:00 in the morning. - funkymonkey99, on 10/12/2007, -0/+6"I think people should be free to engage in any sexual practices they choose; they should draw the line at goats though."
Elton John - DNAString, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Do you know how hard it is to find original jokes? Most new jokes are variations of old ones and most joke lists are recompilations of old joke lists. Just read it in hopes of finding the emerald you haven't seen before. Rarely (but it happens) there is something completely new, that just might make your day.
- c64glen, on 11/14/2007, -0/+5I thought for fun, I would digg you down and block you.
- Copyrighted, on 10/12/2007, -3/+8I didn't know who he was.
- Methodius, on 10/12/2007, -1/+6Or the ultimate: "Nice shoes. Let's *****." The sheer balls required for that line proves you're well qualified as a mate. Feel free to use it on anyone you don't think you'll talk to ever again.
- themastersb, on 10/12/2007, -6/+10A hymen on a girl is like a 'Do not use if seal is broken' label on groceries.
- ophilye, on 10/12/2007, -0/+3I take it you haven't actually seen Emo Phillips.
That guy got the short end of a lot of sticks. ... and that's just from his blurb on Space Ghost. - mcdavis941, on 10/12/2007, -2/+5At least once before you die you should try having sex with someone you actually like. You know, just to try something different.
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2My favourite is...
"Software is like sex: it's better if RMS isn't involved."
/can't remember the source. - Methodius, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2The guy's a complete goofball, but he is hilarious.
- in2thel2ain, on 10/12/2007, -3/+5These are my fav's
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."
Tom Clancy
and
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
George Burns - Methodius, on 10/12/2007, -0/+2There's nothing I like better than having Rodney Dangerfield debunked at me.
- inactive, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1"One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other. "
This one is too good!!! - thiru, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?
Dustin Hoffman
ROFL ;-) - encognito, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable.
Lord Chesterfield - barrylefarge, on 10/12/2007, -0/+1Extra hilarious. Where can I find more topics like this one?
- stargazinc, on 12/16/2007, -0/+0find more interesting sex quotes - sex http://www.online4love.com
- jcorbett66, on 12/27/2008, -0/+0I like steve jobs line
Sex is an important part of our life.
Everybody wants sex. Sex is a skill and if you have the right tools you can make it a masterpiece
Further, if you want to know more about Better sex and becoming a masterful lover just logged on to the below link:
http://www.masteryoursexlife.info
Thanks
Jay - Paulthompson88, on 11/19/2008, -0/+0This is great....... Sex is the most important part of our life.
Everybody dreams about having and giving the best sex sessions ever. Sex can be a major problem for many people, and not because they aren't getting any, but because they don't perform very well.
Further, if you want to know more about Better sex just logged on to the below link:
http://www.zoren.com
Keep up the fantastic work!!!!!!! - maggiecooley, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0sex it something you need when you are with someone you love , it helps you be free and release .
stop pretending that you know nothing about it or you don't like it at all . people won't believe that you don't want to ***** when you are with your boyfriend .
just do it .nobody would care ! - cepiloth, on 12/30/2008, -0/+0hahaha agree with cenobite ^^''
Male Enhancement : http://phallusive.com/
Yoga Info's : http://www.yogaexercisesgeartour.com/
Treat your osteoporosis : http://www.osteoporosis-treatment.biz/
Canine Heartworms Cure : http://www.naturalcuresforcanineheartworms.com/
Phix a new healthy drink : http://www.squidoo.com/phix
Yeast Infections cure : http://home-remedies-for-candida-depression.com/
Hair Loss Reviewed : http://www.productsforhairlossreviews.com/
Latest Real Estate Info's : http://www.info4realestate.co.cc
Latest Website Builder Info's : http://websitebuilder.traderforum.info/
Forex News and Info's : http://forex.traderforum.info/
Gout Treatments : http://www.gout-treatments.org/
Maqui Superrberry : http://www.maquisuperberryreview.com/ - maggiecooley, on 10/12/2007, -0/+0I agree with you guys , @_@
- 16777216, on 10/12/2007, -2/+1Yes you are.
- JumpFreakster, on 10/12/2007, -1/+0I like steve jobs line
http://www.hypotheekrotterdam.nl - tcquad, on 10/12/2007, -3/+2Except for the fact it should start "Both halves"...
- chronicles2, on 10/12/2007, -1/+0Marc Madow says: Sex is no good if she farts in your face, like Paris Hilton did in mine! But she was still an awesome *****!
- Ystig, on 10/12/2007, -4/+2A personal favourite, not on the list:
"While I had often said that I wanted to die in bed, what I really meant was that in my old age I wanted to be stepped on by an elephant while making love." - Roger Zelazny (via Corwin of Amber in Guns of Avalon) -
Show 51 - 65 of 65 discussions
© Digg Inc. 2009
— Content created and posted by Digg users is