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The Ten Worst Job Interview Questions Ever

businesspundit.com — What was the worst job interview question you were ever asked? Good interview questions can help employers judge the technical qualifications, people skills, problem solving approach, and team fit of prospective employees. Bad interview questions do none of those. Instead, they confuse, irk, or offend the applicant (often in combination).

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  • blackdrivel, on 04/03/2008, -68/+96Question - "Have you ever brought a lawsuit against an employer?" Answer- "No, but I’m always open to new experiences."
  • chrisgarrett, on 04/03/2008, -5/+27I always find I do best in the job interviews I am not bothered about. Might be worth trying these if I am ever in that position again ;)
  • tvnews, on 04/03/2008, -43/+71#5 - How do you define sexual harassment?
    "Come closer and I’ll show you.” :)
    • doctechnical, on 04/03/2008, -1/+39"I admit I may be a little rusty after all my years shooting porn overseas (yes, under "Multimedia Specialist" on the CV). So to get an idea of what range we're talking about, do you consider 2 Girls 1 Cup to be SFW, or is that just a little over the line?"
    • moonguidex, on 04/03/2008, -1/+40That was also in the article. Good job!
  • surKaz, on 04/03/2008, -6/+250so... we're all just going to quote the article?...
    • esteskid, on 04/03/2008, -1/+73“I don’t think that’s an appropriate question”
    • pwnerofnoobs, on 04/03/2008, -4/+51"No, but I’m always open to new experiences."
    • LuckyASN, on 04/03/2008, -1/+22"Upon further consideration, this could be a valid “team fit” question in certain technical disciplines."
    • nullx42, on 04/03/2008, -1/+47"The contents of this site are protected under copyright by SeaWaves Technology. Blog design and development by the 449.BP partners include: Car Rental UK, France, Avis, Hertz & Alamo, Casinos Canada, Freelance Web Development, Fundraisers, Gexa Energy, homeowner loans, Poker California, Sexy Tattoos, Texas Electricity Providers "
    • undersky, on 04/03/2008, -12/+3i read the whole thread...are you guys kidding me? almost every one actually chime in to this article??? do you guys not want to get a job? interviews questions are not meant to make sense or not, but to reveal who you are to them. if they ask you a stupid "yes" online question like "do you work under pressure," it's your chance to turn it into a story about you coping stress. in fact, every question they ask you is a chance for you to advertise about yourself. the art of interview is, you don't have to really answer anything they ask, and most of the time they don't even pay attention to what they ask you. as long you use the time to advertise yourself confidently and professionally, that's what they want!
      i know this article is funny, but trust me, these questions (except the illegal ones) are extremely common and actually great for you. make sure you answer them right so you can get a job.
      as for the illegal ones, they ARE illegal and the HR dept always trains interviewers on what not to ask. if you been asked with such question, you got a golden ticket to the job! you can sue the company for not hiring you due to discrimination!
      but the correct answer would be (my law professor taught me): "ah ha, i know you are just testing my legal knowledge. you know this question is off limit and you want to see if i know." these questions are off limit because employment law specifically prohibited them for reasons listed by other ppl already.
      • covertbadger, on 04/03/2008, -4/+1"the art of interview is, you don't have to really answer anything they ask, and most of the time they don't even pay attention to what they ask you. as long you use the time to advertise yourself confidently and professionally, that's what they want!"

        As someone who does a whole lot of interviewing, let me assure you that I most certainly pay attention to how well my questions are answered, and if you behaved like that in one of my interviews I'd laugh you out of the door within 10 minutes.
      • xDynaBlade, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4Dude.... go outside....
      • SpikeTheSenses, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4your ***** response is longer than the article
    • lifeinchains, on 04/03/2008, -1/+2Yes, this is Digg after all.
  • asnider, on 04/03/2008, -3/+39OK, I liked the article, but I fail to see what’s illegal about questions 7, 2 & 1. Anyone able to explain why those are illegal?
    • Zarokima, on 04/03/2008, -1/+2I suppose 1 could constitute a verbal contract in some areas (more likely so if the interviews are recorded), which opens up all kinds of possibilities for future litigation on behalf of the company. 2 could be for something like probing, maybe? 7 might also could count as a verbal contract ("You see, he told us he could work well under pressure so we assigned him to do *something really important* and he dropped the ball. That's why we're suing.").
    • Lane, on 04/03/2008, -2/+201) age discrimination
      2) people with disabilities
      7)post dramatic stress syndrome?
      • Tyrghast, on 04/03/2008, -3/+25post-traumatic stress syndrome...
        • Suspected, on 04/03/2008, -0/+28post-traumatic stress disorder...
      • Railer, on 04/03/2008, -0/+11"post dramatic stress syndrome?" - Never sit in the front row of a William Shatner Play
    • thrin, on 04/03/2008, -0/+19Actually, I think the I's and the H's might have been swapped.
    • wilf_brim, on 04/03/2008, -3/+2Specifically, 1 is illegal is the true answer is "8 months pregnant and about to go on maternity leave" or something similar.
    • xXIrsotehkewlXx, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Question 1 is more for the women. Family usually takes women away from jobs and so companies want to know if they have or want children and a family, but it's illegal to ask.
  • carguy25, on 04/03/2008, -6/+13Q7 "Can you work under pressure?" is a legitimate, if hackneyed question. The writer probably mislabeled.
    • asnider, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3That's what I was thinking, too.
    • doctechnical, on 04/03/2008, -2/+28And just what kind of answer would you be expecting to that question? "No, I fall apart faster than Rainman when he misses Judge Wopner"
      Let me guess. You work in HR.
      • asnider, on 04/03/2008, -4/+5He said it's a legitimate question. He didn't say it was a useful one. Of course everyone is going to say "yes" when asked if they work well under pressure.
        • postitnote, on 04/03/2008, -0/+8Then it's not a legitimate question. It's like asking someone "Did you lose weight?" or "How do you keep yourself looking so fit?"
        • actionscripted, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4If the answer is always "yes" then it's a worthless question.

          Suggested alternatives: "Is this pen a pen?"
          • Coffeedemon, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3The answer should never be just "yes". It should be "yes - and here are some examples of situations where pressure was on and I still performed like a champ..."
          • insertAliasHere, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Exactly. They know the answer's always yes, but there's more to the question than that. The interviewer is giving you an opening to sell yourself, to tell him/her about the times you have had to work under pressure and how well you performed. If you just said yes and waited for the next question, well, that's like the wrong answer to the question that has no wrong answer.

            It's the same with some of the other questions. If you're taking this article as advice and not the comedy that it is, I hope you have several interviews lined up, because if you behave like this, you'll never find a job.
      • Entroper, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3I would be expecting more than a one-word answer. Just because the right answer is obvious doesn't mean that there aren't good and bad ways to answer "yes" to that question. This question is often phrased differently, like "tell me about a time when you had to work under pressure." Of course no one is going to tell an interviewer that they can't perform well under pressure, but if you can't give an example of a time when you have, it raises an eyebrow.
    • mescad, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Seemingly legal, unless the answer would force me to reveal a mental illness. It's probing for something that you can't ask.
    • wilf_brim, on 04/03/2008, -3/+4I have a better answer. I've been diving professionally. So, I can honestly answer, "Yes, tested up to 86 psi wet, and [classified] dry".
    • digjam, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Yeah I can as long as its 760mmHg or 101.325 kPa.
  • CunningLinguist, on 04/03/2008, -2/+124New one: "We like to consider ourselves an 'open' company who celebrates diversity, tell me about a time you've experience diversity in the workplace"

    Response: "Well there was this time I called an Asian co-worker a chink and later I realized she was Korean. Boy did I feel silly and we all had a good laugh afterward. Did you know Asians really like photography equipment?"
    • doctechnical, on 04/03/2008, -2/+64"When I found out the blond in the next cubicle over was a lesbo, I celebrated pretty hard and fast. You can ask Ceiling Cat!"
    • Wuss, on 04/03/2008, -14/+1ha.... ha... ha? not really. I understand you're trying to grab a laugh or two, but that was just *****' stupid.
      • cphelps, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4Actually, it was pretty hilarious. You're response was the one that was "just *****' stupid".
    • kuzotz, on 04/08/2008, -0/+1That's pretty easy seeing that my previous jobs involved working at transnational conferences.
  • SHv2, on 04/03/2008, -4/+109Quick, describe yourself in three words...
    Om nom nom
  • michaeladewitt, on 04/03/2008, -6/+0Nuts! I proofread the text and mixed up two of the images. Thanks for pointing that out!
  • JueYan, on 04/03/2008, -33/+1IBanking/ Consulting brainteaser question:

    You have 12 balls. All of them are identical except one, which is either heavier or lighter than the rest - it is either hollow while the rest are solid, or solid while the rest are hollow. You have a simple two-armed scale, and are permitted three weighings. Can you identify the odd ball, and determine whether it is hollow or solid?









    Step 1: Weigh four balls against four others.

    Case A: If, on the first weighing, the balls balance
    If the balls in our first weighing balance we know the odd ball is one of those not weighed, but we don't know whether it is heavy or light. How can we gain this information easily? We can weigh them against the balls we know to be normal. So:

    Step 2 (for Case A): Put three of the unweighed balls on the Side A; put three balls that are known to be normal on Side B.

    I. If on this second weighing, the scale balances again, we know that the final unweighed ball is the odd one.

    Step 3a (for Case A): Weigh the final unweighed ball (the odd one) against one of the normal balls. With this weighing, we determine whether the odd ball is heavy or light.

    II. If on this second weighing, the scale tips to Side A, we know that the odd ball is heavy. (If it tips to Side B, we know the odd ball is light, but let's proceed with the assumption that the odd ball is heavy.) We also know that the odd ball is one of the group of three on Side A.

    Step 3b (for Case A): Weigh one of the balls from the group of three against another one. If the scale balances, the ball from the group of three that was unweighed is the odd ball, and is heavy. If the scale tilts, we can identify the odd ball, because we know it is heavier than the other. (If the scale had tipped to Side B, we would use the same logical process, using the knowledge that the odd ball is light.)

    Case B: If the balls do not balance on the first weighing
    If the balls do not balance on the first weighing, we know that the odd ball is one of the eight balls that was weighed. We also know that the group of four unweighed balls are normal, and that one of the sides, let's say Side A, is heavier than the other (although we don't know whether the odd ball is heavy or light).

    Step 2 (for Case B): Take three balls from the unweighed group and use them to replace three balls on Side A (the heavy side). Take the three balls from Side A and use them to replace three balls on Side B (which are removed from the scale).

    I. If the scale balances, we know that one of the balls removed from the scale was the odd one. In this case, we know that the ball is also light. We can proceed with the third weighing as described in step 3b from Case A.

    II. If the scale tilts to the other side, so that Side B is now the heavy side, we know that one of the three balls moved from Side A to Side B is the odd ball, and that it is heavy. We proceed with the third weighing as described in step 3b in Case A.

    III. If the scale remains the same, we know that one of the two balls on the scale that was not shifted in our second weighing is the odd ball. We also know that the unmoved ball from Side A is heavier than the unmoved ball on Side B (though we don't know whether the odd ball is heavy or light).

    Step 3 (for Case B): Weigh the ball from Side A against a normal ball. If the scale balances, the ball from Side B is the odd one, and is light. If the scale does not balance, the ball from Side A is the odd one, and is heavy.

    Whew! As you can see from this solution, one of the keys to this problem is understanding that information can be gained about balls even if they are not being weighed. For example, if we know that one of the balls of two groups that are being weighed is the odd ball, we know that the unweighed balls are normal. Once this is known, we realize that breaking the balls up into smaller and smaller groups of three (usually eventually down to three balls), is a good strategy - and an ultimately successful one.
    • doctechnical, on 04/03/2008, -1/+9"Can you identify the odd ball, and determine whether it is hollow or solid?"
      The proper answer to this question would be "Yes, I can. And I read 'How do you move Mt. Fuji', too."
      • inigomntoya, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Hmm... Witty AND literate. I like you. Your hired!
    • dupswapdrop, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3Just a minute I have to go get my shotgun to figure this out!
    • Zarokima, on 04/03/2008, -0/+8Yes, and I can do it without any weighings! I use the scale to smash the balls one-by-one, keeping track of which ones explode in what manner (hollow bits or solid chunks) and find the odd one. Assuming I find it as soon as possible, it only takes three smashes: one is the odd ball, and the other two give the norm.

      You only said I was permitted three weighings, you didn't say anything about using the scale and/or balls in some other way.
    • frogman54, on 04/03/2008, -0/+13I knew a guy with 12 balls. He sure walked funny.
    • tobias1482, on 04/03/2008, -0/+0Wow, really, really long description...
      What is the algorithmic complexity of that binary search?
    • kmccormi, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I'm too preoccupied because for some reason I imagine a flat scale-bed instead of a dish-like one so my mind is too worried imagining the balls rolling off to bother solving the problem.
    • gurudrew, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1"Can you identify the odd ball, and determine whether it is hollow or solid?"
      Odd ball = you
      hollow or solid = I don't know you well enough
  • JueYan, on 04/03/2008, -42/+1IBanking/Consulting Brainteaser Question:
    You have 12 balls. All of them are identical except one, which is either heavier or lighter than the rest - it is either hollow while the rest are solid, or solid while the rest are hollow. You have a simple two-armed scale, and are permitted three weighings. Can you identify the odd ball, and determine whether it is hollow or solid?







    Step 1: Weigh four balls against four others.

    Case A: If, on the first weighing, the balls balance
    If the balls in our first weighing balance we know the odd ball is one of those not weighed, but we don't know whether it is heavy or light. How can we gain this information easily? We can weigh them against the balls we know to be normal. So:

    Step 2 (for Case A): Put three of the unweighed balls on the Side A; put three balls that are known to be normal on Side B.

    I. If on this second weighing, the scale balances again, we know that the final unweighed ball is the odd one.

    Step 3a (for Case A): Weigh the final unweighed ball (the odd one) against one of the normal balls. With this weighing, we determine whether the odd ball is heavy or light.

    II. If on this second weighing, the scale tips to Side A, we know that the odd ball is heavy. (If it tips to Side B, we know the odd ball is light, but let's proceed with the assumption that the odd ball is heavy.) We also know that the odd ball is one of the group of three on Side A.

    Step 3b (for Case A): Weigh one of the balls from the group of three against another one. If the scale balances, the ball from the group of three that was unweighed is the odd ball, and is heavy. If the scale tilts, we can identify the odd ball, because we know it is heavier than the other. (If the scale had tipped to Side B, we would use the same logical process, using the knowledge that the odd ball is light.)

    Case B: If the balls do not balance on the first weighing
    If the balls do not balance on the first weighing, we know that the odd ball is one of the eight balls that was weighed. We also know that the group of four unweighed balls are normal, and that one of the sides, let's say Side A, is heavier than the other (although we don't know whether the odd ball is heavy or light).

    Step 2 (for Case B): Take three balls from the unweighed group and use them to replace three balls on Side A (the heavy side). Take the three balls from Side A and use them to replace three balls on Side B (which are removed from the scale).

    I. If the scale balances, we know that one of the balls removed from the scale was the odd one. In this case, we know that the ball is also light. We can proceed with the third weighing as described in step 3b from Case A.

    II. If the scale tilts to the other side, so that Side B is now the heavy side, we know that one of the three balls moved from Side A to Side B is the odd ball, and that it is heavy. We proceed with the third weighing as described in step 3b in Case A.

    III. If the scale remains the same, we know that one of the two balls on the scale that was not shifted in our second weighing is the odd ball. We also know that the unmoved ball from Side A is heavier than the unmoved ball on Side B (though we don't know whether the odd ball is heavy or light).

    Step 3 (for Case B): Weigh the ball from Side A against a normal ball. If the scale balances, the ball from Side B is the odd one, and is light. If the scale does not balance, the ball from Side A is the odd one, and is heavy.

    Whew! As you can see from this solution, one of the keys to this problem is understanding that information can be gained about balls even if they are not being weighed. For example, if we know that one of the balls of two groups that are being weighed is the odd ball, we know that the unweighed balls are normal. Once this is known, we realize that breaking the balls up into smaller and smaller groups of three (usually eventually down to three balls), is a good strategy - and an ultimately successful one.
  • asnider, on 04/03/2008, -1/+33Question #8: The one about holding the pen. What exactly is that supposed to be testing for? I've never had an interviewer pull that one on my, and I've never heard of it happening to anyone else. Obviously, the author of the article has a good point in calling it useless, but do interviewers who use it think that it will tell them about the applicant?
    • inigomntoya, on 04/03/2008, -2/+10I would neither take the pen nor ask what they were doing. I would ask if they knew that they had a booger hanging from their nose or needed to pop a zit. Then I would ask if they knew what would happen to this very moment if I went back in time and killed my grandmother. I would then get up and walk away - knowing I never wanted to work for that guy.
    • Entroper, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2This one I agree on, it sounds like something you would be asked at an interview for a sales job. To see if you're a "go-getter." Cheap, superficial, and fake, IMO, but then again, aren't they looking for someone who can fake enthusiasm?
    • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -0/+6I don't get this either, particularly what the "correct" response is. If someone hands me something, I assume it means they expect me to take it. Unless it has poo on it or the guy wants another set of prints on a handgun, I'll generally take it.
    • Bilabrin, on 04/03/2008, -1/+1I was wondering about that one myself...
    • DevilDriver, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4I think its more of test of how the applicant handles an awkward or uncertain situation. If they just sit there and stare at you for an hour, they're obviously an un-motivated tool. If they take the pen, well they're just a regular tool.
      • inigomntoya, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1And if they ask if you have a pencil?
    • Earlsports, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3That's why I always bring my own pen to an interview. Not only do I look prepared, but it if this situation ever comes up I can whip out a pen of my own and hold it right up to theirs.

      Your move, interviewer...
      • bowe, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1lol. That's exactly what I thought. ET-pen them.
    • TripcodeMel, on 04/03/2008, -0/+0I did paid signature petitioning for ballot initiatives for a while as a part-time job over a holiday break. One of the things they told me in training was, hold the board up to them with one hand -- and hold out the pen with the other. An overwhelming majority of people will instinctively take the pen, and the logical next step is to sign whatever's in front of you. It was a way of getting your foot in the door.
  • czeman, on 04/03/2008, -4/+42"If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?"
    "I have a redwood in my pants. Does that count?"
  • MagnumVP, on 04/03/2008, -3/+24"If your wife was a piece of hockey equipment, what'd she be?
    A: A goalie mask -- Wiry and closed off.
    B: A stick -- Long, rigid and likes to hit things.
    C: Elbow pads -- Soft, flexible and a good housekeeper."

    Good Housekeeper?? HUH....

    Takes care of the joint.
    • shadowofdeath15, on 04/03/2008, -1/+7Someone's been watching nick at nite
    • hmac, on 04/03/2008, -0/+13d) The Puck - Round, Black, and easy to smack around?
    • allisonaxe, on 04/03/2008, -0/+6e) the ice - cold and rigid, and everyone plays games on top of her.
    • fuzzybeard, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4f) The Zamboni - Tidies up after everyone.
    • Kurlumbenus, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2g) a cup - always on my dick about something.
  • brettbum, on 04/03/2008, -0/+15Its ridiculously funny that in about 2 months this page is going to get pushed up into the top 10 of Google search for the key words job interview questions and HR people from around the country are going to end up reading this list of comments and filing complaints against themselves. :)
  • EmitStop, on 04/03/2008, -2/+69"What is the airspeed of an unladen swallow?"
    African or European?
    • matth1jd, on 04/03/2008, -0/+13How do you know so much about swallows?
      • mescad, on 04/03/2008, -0/+12And there we find ourselves back to question #5.
      • Proteus1935, on 04/03/2008, -0/+18Well, you have to know these things when you're a king
        • JakieTreehorn, on 04/03/2008, -0/+8He must be a king.
          How can you tell?
          He hasn't got ***** all over him.
    • passedoutghost, on 04/03/2008, -0/+711 meters per second or 24 miles per hour. http://www.style.org/unladenswallow/
      • actionscripted, on 04/03/2008, -0/+8What if it's carrying a coconut, smart guy?
        • acetv, on 04/03/2008, -0/+13Unladen swallows don't carry coconuts.
          • hmemcpy, on 04/03/2008, -1/+5Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
          • NinjaBoy, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3What if two swallows carried the coconut.
          • AgarwaenUmarth, on 04/03/2008, -1/+5They're "unladen" -- as in not ladened. As in not carrying anything.
  • MikeHarpe, on 04/03/2008, -0/+32I was back to a place for a THIRD interview, this time in a big room with seemingly everyone that worked at the place. I'm sitting at the head end of a long conference table surrounded by people with that look on their face that says "I hate doing this. I don't know why they make us do this".

    After a couple of stupid questions which I basically joked off, I looked at the other end of the table and this guy had fallen asleep. Deep sleep. His mouth was open, he was snoring, and he was drooling on himself. I am not making this up. When I noticed it I must've not completely covered my reaction. The guy from HR ended the meeting abruptly. I never heard back from them.

    To this day I wish I had done what I thought of doing. I wanted to say "does that happen a lot?" Ah well.
    • brufleth, on 04/03/2008, -1/+4Human resource departments amaze me. The interview for my current job required a 900 mile plane ride. They had a driver take me to a hotel and then to the place to get interviewed the next morning. They forgot one thing though. Food. My interview wasn't until the afternoon and I hadn't eaten a real meal in almost 24 hours.

      The same HR department ignores questions or requests concerning benefits and has ***** on many a potential job candidate which didn't decide to come work here. Human resource people in my experience (and this is a VERY large and valuable company) just seem to suck at their jobs.
      • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -1/+13What, are you incapable of feeding yourself? They gave you a free plane ride, hotel, and a driver. You could at least pay for a hot dog.
        • brufleth, on 04/03/2008, -1/+1There wasn't a hot dog vendor in the hallway of the building I was in all day. Maybe you work on a street corner in NYC but they just aren't that prevalent in office buildings.

          There was in fact a caf and I repeatedly asked if I could go grab some food and was repeatedly told that someone would take me (this is a secure facility) to eat. Eventually lunch time ended.
        • thecatcantalk, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2s.n.a.f.u.
      • bowe, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1..AND yet, you decided to work there.
  • stutimandal, on 04/03/2008, -2/+9First Question asked to me in my only interview so far ...

    "Why were you laughing continuously during my presentation about the company."

    (I was stunned. Obviously the answer should've been that you looked like a complete joker.)
    • brufleth, on 04/03/2008, -0/+8Answer: "Corporate speak is funny to me. Like the noise raccoons make to each other."
    • bowe, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1You think I'm funny? Funny like a clown?
  • LarryLacuna, on 04/03/2008, -11/+174"What do you see yourself doing in ten years?"

    Don't say doing your wife.Don't say doing your wife.Don't say doing your wife.Don't say doing your wife.

    "Doing your...son?"

    I love family guy.
    • huckdunsany, on 04/03/2008, -1/+15I just logged in specifically to digg you up. Well played!
    • Tyrghast, on 04/03/2008, -22/+9I logged in specifically to bury you! ***** family guy.
      • Trav1289, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1well i really did just long in to bury you.
    • hammburglar, on 04/03/2008, -0/+38i logged in specifically to stay neutral. ***** decisiveness.
      • cphelps, on 04/03/2008, -0/+5Aren't you being decisive if you're deciding to be neutral? OH MY GOD MY BRAINS ON FIRE!?!?!?!?
    • passedoutghost, on 04/03/2008, -0/+14I logged in....*****.
    • fxu1989, on 04/03/2008, -0/+21I was already logged in...
    • Archaic1, on 04/03/2008, -0/+5I logged out so I wouldn't accidentally digg you down if I had a spontaneous twitch
    • po43292, on 04/03/2008, -0/+9There was a problem completing my request to Digg you up. I had to refresh the page and try again.
  • TheLoneWolf071, on 04/03/2008, -27/+43Interviewer: "Where do you see yourself in 5 years"

    Peter:Thinking: "Don't say doing you wife, don't say doing your wife" Says: "Doing you... son?"

    Priceless

    • Deviate, on 04/03/2008, -2/+22dugg both you and LarryLacuna for probably writing that response at the same time, completely unaware of the other.
      • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4Yeah, like a modern day Leibniz and Newton. How far we've come.
    • Aristarkhos, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Sorry. I meant to add a dig. clicked on the wrong 'un. APologies!
      "Are you human?"
      ".....(cries inconsolably) Yehhhss!..."
  • wilfordsy, on 04/03/2008, -13/+2"Why did you take the pen from me?"

    When I saw you holding out the pen, I knew what you were doing. Taking it was the fastest way to get the heck out of here. Good day!
    • JedicodeWarrior, on 04/03/2008, -1/+6... when you can snatch the pen from my hand ...
  • Jayg28, on 04/03/2008, -1/+28I once was asked "If you could be a door or a window which would you choose and why." This was a on campus interview during finals for a company I wasn't really interested in so I thanked the woman for her time and left.
    • Gizza, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4"either one is good, I bet they don't get asked stupid questions like this."
    • Aristarkhos, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1"I think I'd choose to be the door - so i can shut you out."
    • brufleth, on 04/03/2008, -0/+5"I'd be a pie, because they are delicious. Next question."
    • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -1/+5I'd rather be a Door, because then I'd get to hang out with Jim Morrison.
    • RetlawST, on 04/03/2008, -0/+7I'd rather be a door, because I love to have my knob handled.
    • Earlsports, on 04/03/2008, -0/+0I'd rather be one of those all glass revolving doors. I like to get the best of both worlds here.
  • scottpigeon, on 04/03/2008, -0/+30If they ask you what your dream job is, don't say "porn star", even in jest. Trust me on that...
    • TnTBass, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I once answered it:
      "Honestly? Sitting on a hot, sunny beach, making 800k per year (I'm not that greedy), watching hot bikini clad women walk by all day, supporting some system in a remote location that never has any problems."

      I got the job. (The interviewers were all male too, so that helped).
      • doogie68, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I had almost the exact same stupid question on a phone interview two days ago. My response was very similar to yours, "Earning a million dollars a year for a position that only requires my presence two hours a day, and doesn't require any actual effort on my part."
        Where do they get this crap?
  • CapeKid, on 04/03/2008, -3/+50"I had a job interview with an insurance company, and the lady said, 'Where do you see yourself in five years?' I said, 'Celebrating the fifth year anniversary of you asking me that question.'" - Mitch Hedburg
  • Anorhc, on 04/03/2008, -0/+18I got asked this question one time during an interview: "If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?" I thought it was a pretty stupid question for a job at a local computer store and gave them a logical answer of: "You can't travel at the speed of light." Apparently it landed me a job as supervisor.
    • temugen, on 04/03/2008, -3/+1There's so many good responses to that.
      1. You'd be infinitely heavy
      2. Time would be stopped
      3. The speed of light is relative, so the light would still be going the speed of you + C
      Of course, all of those are still debated for obvious reasons.
      • imomushi8, on 04/03/2008, -1/+9i know this is a little picky, but... according to you, if you travel at the speed of light, light leaving you travels at 2c? light always travels at c.
        and just a side-note, relativistic velocities dont add the same way non-relativistic velocities add. ...with relativistic velocities u and v, their combined velocity = (u+v)/(1+uv/(c^2))
        • temugen, on 04/03/2008, -1/+1You're right... I phrased that horribly wrong. What I meant was that even if you were to travel the speed of light, if you were to measure the speed, it would still be going the speed of light.
    • undersky, on 04/03/2008, -3/+3Unlike temugen's friendliness, what you (incorrectly) stated about speed of light + C was a HUGE mistake. I can't believe someone who knows what "C" stands for would forget about introductory physics.
    • Aristarkhos, on 04/03/2008, -2/+0A computer store guys...who will waste time thinking up "introductory physics".
      How many of us stayed awake? Most of us surrendered themselves to a more biological phenomenon - sleep. Which is when gravity takes over. Slam!
      Head-on-desk.
      Eureka! I should have brought a softer notebook.
  • JedicodeWarrior, on 04/03/2008, -0/+5I've usually walked out of the interview by the time these questions are asked/
    • Kurlumbenus, on 04/03/2008, -1/+2How's being an unemployed prick workign out for you?
      • JedicodeWarrior, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Couldn;t really say. Haven't been unemployed for more than 20 years. Your momma still selling herself on the corner?
  • icegoddess13, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Here's what I don't get: If you want to apply somewhere but can only do so online and they use Unicru (Best Buy, Borders, among others), questions about whether or not you've been convicted of a felony or misdemeanor always pops up, and you can't skip that question; you have to answer it to complete the application, and asking those questions are illegal. I've contacted managers of places before about this, and they claim nothing can be done. So much for a second job...
    • mescad, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1You could always answer "This question is illegal" I guess.
      • ComeOutSwingin, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3Not if its multiple choice.
      • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1If you're going to use that answer, you might as well just skip the interview altogether.
    • SynApse77, on 04/03/2008, -0/+8Actually this is completely legal to ask. They cannot however ask what felony you were convicted of. I've given plenty of interviews and had to listen to the HR training about it many, many times.
    • thecatcantalk, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Sorry, but you're wrong...it's perfectly legal to ask if you've been convicted of a felony. An employer has a legitimate reason to wish to avoid hiring a thief/con man/murderer/drug dealer/etc.
    • ilves7, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1yea, this is legal. You, however, don't have to tell them WHAT the felony is, but since they already know you've been convicted of one, not telling them will probably cause them not to hire you.
  • Whackly, on 04/03/2008, -0/+14Are the "Hackneyed" and "Illegal" designations swapped?
  • Puisapres, on 04/03/2008, -0/+7Wait, WTH is with the pen question?
    • Avor, on 04/03/2008, -0/+22I don't know, but I want it to happen to me. I'll pull out a larger pen, set it next to theirs, and put them in their place.
    • po43292, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4Bring a feather and a bottle of ink to the next interview.
  • egoideal, on 04/03/2008, -6/+1"Where do you see yourself in five years?" Nowhere, I assume it's because he can't go back in time.
  • Kohaxx, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1The top two aren't that big of a deal. Biggest weakness is a dumb question so just glorify it with a dumb response, I usually go with something dumb like "I'm overly attentive to detail." The number one question isn't a big deal if it gets asked for a non-perm position, at a perm position I'd probably say "I don't plan that far ahead", and for a temp or contract just flat out say something higher class (profile, not paygrade) than what they're offering, it gives the illusion that you have ambitions and that they better make it worth your while.
    The top two you're going to hear from people trained in the old way of conducting interviews or people who just don't do a lot of recruiting, the "walk out the door if you hear this" line is just silly.
    • darkmist, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3Biggest weakness? I hate answering dumb questions.
    • undersky, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2the most common interview is the STAR format (situation, task, action, and response).

      there is no bad or stupid question. they are all to challenge and test you, but actually great opportunities for you to speak about yourself. use them to say whatever you want them to know about you, don't limit yourself to the "answer" for those questions.
    • vspazv, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I usually say fire.
    • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -1/+1I always say my biggest weakness is "I work too hard".
  • carl25, on 04/03/2008, -2/+28#10 - What interests you about our company?
    “Um, I heard you were hiring?”

    Oh god, i wish i could actually say that, instead of some corny bs
    • passedoutghost, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Do it with a job that you don't actually want. I did it when I was interviewed by a contractor of Dell.
      • jgardner100, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I had an interview with Phillips that wasn't going so well, so I answered this question with "I saw your ad in the newspaper" I didn't get the job, but didn't want it either. Job interviews are a two way street
  • H0tKarl, on 04/03/2008, -10/+4Don't forget the post interview thank you letter:

    Dear interviewer,
    Thank you for giving me the opportunity to interview with your company. Further details of my previous experience can be seen at the following link:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU&fmt=7

    Best regards,
  • D3koy, on 04/03/2008, -4/+13"where do you see yourself in 5 years"
    "celebrating the 5 year anniversary of you asking me this question"
    -RIP Mitch...
    • synyster, on 04/03/2008, -0/+15 years older :(
    • asteroid, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I always thought the proper smartass answer was, "Why, I'll be sitting at YOUR desk" (assuming that it's a manager asking the question and not an HR person). It's actually a test question; if they assume that the reason I'd be promoted is that the manager herself would have moved up in the organization, it says something positive about the company (despite the stupid question). If they assume that it's because I've gotten 'em kicked out, it's a run-don't-walk situation.

      Actually, as I've moved up the career ladder this is less of a stupid question. Asking someone with several years of experience in which direction she wants to go -- such as senior tech vs management -- is a reasonable thing to want to know. However, it's usually asked of Accounting Clerk I or junior salesthing applicants.
  • Captj, on 04/03/2008, -3/+3DAMN! Beat out by D3koy by 4 mins...
    • yacks, on 04/03/2008, -1/+1you mean by Capekid 7 minutes before you. and 2 minutes before D3koy
  • dbre2, on 04/03/2008, -0/+16My greatest weakness is how I answer this question
    • TnTBass, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I had a question: What are 3 things you are really good at?
      I had totally blown one interview question earlier on, so I answered it:
      "I'm really good at blowing interview questions"

      I got the job. I knew the interviewers though, so I guess that helped.
  • J3553, on 04/03/2008, -2/+17they missed one...

    "what do you think you can bring to the company"

    this one never made sense to me. my usual response is "how the ***** do i know? put me on the payroll and see what happens." or if i really want the job, it's "cupcakes".
    • jellyfishing, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3I really do bring cupcakes to work!
    • Pittance, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Thats what my manager brings to this company. And shes damn well worth whatever they pay her. OM NOM NOM.
    • TnTBass, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1"Ask not what you can do for the company, but what the company can do for you."
      I really want to try that.
  • camino262, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4"Why are manhole covers round?"
    • Aensland, on 04/03/2008, -0/+6Because square ones won't fit.
    • shadowsurfr1, on 04/03/2008, -2/+6Because they're made for Americans?
    • yacks, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3Well back when I watched Mr. Wizard, he explained this.. It's because e=mc2.
    • FreydNot, on 04/03/2008, -1/+3Clearly because there is no "correct" orientation when replacing them thus allowing the worker to be even more lazy and use less brainpower. Let us raise our glasses to the man who invented the round manhole cover!
    • devaspark, on 04/03/2008, -0/+15So the covers don't fall in with a certain orientation.
    • moonshn, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4because a square one can fall through it's respective hole and kill the workers below... a round one cannot.

      edit: didn't see devaspark there
    • ITinNYC, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1i thought i was the only who got asked this question.
    • vinividivici, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2I was asked to give 3 reasons why they were round on an interview. This was for a programming job about 10 years ago. This was the dumbest question by far that I was ever asked.
    • rocktopotomus, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3because manholes are round
    • Zipko, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1So fat people can fit through them.
  • EwMo, on 04/03/2008, -2/+9My uncle's job required a psychiatric evaluation as apart of the contract (I think. He had to take it for some reason...) and he just sat across from the psychiatrist and left his mouth open until he drooled. He somehow managed to get the job.
    • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4When Timothy Leary was arrested, they gave him a psychiatric evaluation - with tests that Leary created.
      • daftbrain, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4And Leary answered the tests in such a way that made him seem like a docile, conforming person with an interest in gardening, which led him to being assigned to work as a gardener in a low-security prison. He then escaped from that prison and fled the country.
    • Pittance, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I lold pretty hard at work. Nice one.
  • 4bit, on 04/03/2008, -3/+1I'd love to see some laws against some of his 'illegals'.

    Useless is in the eye of the beholder, and if it's important enough for the interviewer to ask, they probably have a reason.

    Hackneyed, again, opinion. I agree on a lot of them, but unless you're going for some public speaking gig, I doubt your commentary is much better. In fact I'd say most of the responses are hackneyed.
    • pinguwin, on 04/03/2008, -1/+4> they probably have a reason.

      Not always. My friend was a programmer and had to interview people and would ask them what kind of computer system they had at home. The candidate would always relate their home system to their computer knowledge and how it showed they could bring x, y, or z to the company. He really wasn't searching for anything with this question. Rather he had no idea what to ask and couldn't think of any other question.
      • tobias1482, on 04/03/2008, -2/+1That explains why your friend "was" a programmer... or did he die? Sorry if that's what happened
      • 4bit, on 04/03/2008, -3/+2Well, I AM a programmer, when hiring my assistant questions I ask that would be on this list were:

        "What Star Wars Character would you be?" & "Do you have a computer at home? what kind?"

        The second told me a lot if they said "Dell" vs. "Well, I put it together myself with a x,y, and z." Even if they said "Dell" asking what components were in it, told me the level of interest they have in the machines. Nothing was held against them if they didn't have one at home, but if they did it was a starting point to poke further.

        The fact that the question DID tell your friend how they could bring X, Y and Z to the company meant it was useful even if he didn't know what it was, and even if he didn't use it.

        Now for Star Wars, it was two things. Do they see themselves as the hero, the wise man, the what? It gives me a little insight past a stat sheet resume to know how this person likes to work. Or rather, wishes they'd work. Additionally, can they relate to the group here in a 'team fit' kind of way.

        Favorite answers to it so far:
        "I prefer Star Trek" - a more practical than fantasy worker. Still liked the sci-fi, but prefered a different environment.
        "Can I use the books and video games, or just the movies?" - Reads. Spends has an interest in computers beyond work. Has something in common with the team that we can talk about.

        I am hiring for the job I need. If you don't like my questions, you probably don't like my manager style. And that's fine. I'd rather you walk out, I don't need a premadona on staff anyway.

        Again, if the article is going to qualify something as illegal, they should cite the laws they're brekaing. If they think the questions are hackneyed they're entitled to their opinion, but not everyone thinks so, and useless is only if the interviewer genuinely doesn't have a reason for asking, which again, they can't know.
        • EvilJelloMan, on 04/03/2008, -1/+2And how often, exactly, do you hire a new assistant?

          "I'd rather you walk out, I don't need a premadona [sic] on staff anyway."

          If you have to keep re-hiring assistants, you might want to look at your own managerial style, rather than accusing everyone who doesn't like your stupid ***** starwars questions of being a prima donna.
          • 4bit, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Rarely, actually.

            But if you can't lighten up, have some fun, and roll with whatever crazy ***** the users are going to throw on your desk, you're not going to make it. If 'this is stupid' or 'I dont' need this' is how you treat a request, that's something I'm happy to find out in the interview.
        • Kurlumbenus, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Prima Donna Found!
    • trevor98, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Most interviewers simply ask the questions they've heard other interviewers ask or ones prepared in advanced by a board.
    • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1In my experience, if the interviewer starts asking these sort of ***** questions, you're not going to get the job. They're just trying to kill some time to finish out the interview. If they were actually interested in hiring you they'd ask you real questions. So, if you are getting ***** questions there's no real reason to not give a smart-ass response.
      • Kurlumbenus, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2So, you're saying you make a lot of interviews but don't get the jobs? Why should we assume your words have any merit if you're such a loser?
      • 4bit, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1I don't have time to interview someone for 'fun'. If the interview is over, it's over. If I'm asking these '*****' questiosn it's because I"m trying to learn a little more about YOU beyond just work habbits, to see if you're a fit for the team. Perhaps when they ask these questions they find out who you are?
  • bigtizzle, on 04/03/2008, -0/+10"Do you like gladiator movies?"
  • Tyrghast, on 04/03/2008, -6/+1Very funny.
  • pardimate, on 04/03/2008, -2/+18Hah, I am missing my right hand, and I once had a woman ask what happened to it during an interview. And I didn't get the job. Probably could have sued pretty easily.
    • vanlawrence, on 04/03/2008, -0/+6what happened to it?
      • Kurlumbenus, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1Careful, he'll sue you for noticing it.
        • pardimate, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1pardimate - A female from the United States who joined Digg on.....
    • sakuraz, on 04/03/2008, -1/+2WHAT THE HELL?
      PEOPLE CAN TYPE WITH ONE HAND?
      • nshady, on 04/03/2008, -1/+1He can also type while wearing a boxing glove.
      • tapeworm77, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3Yes, but they can't have cyber-sex.
      • chix0r, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2Yes but in order to type in all caps you need two hands, one to hold down the shift key as you type. Obviously you have no problem with that. Nevermind, I'm going to assume your caps lock key is broken.
  • incunity, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3I got a job by using the Mitch Hedberg quote.
  • SleepyJane, on 04/03/2008, -1/+0An interviewer asked me once why manhole covers were round and not square. I thought it was bizarre. They later explained it was a question in critcal thinking. BTW- the answer is so they won't fall down in the hole. LOL
    • InvaderDem, on 04/03/2008, -2/+2Huh .. but that doesn't make sense, unless there's something supporting it, even a circle would fall down the hole. So essentially you can make a square manhole cover. Or maybe I'm just dense and missing something. (that's probably it)
      • pinguwin, on 04/03/2008, -0/+4Pick up the square manhole and rotate 45 degrees and put it on edge. If the cover is 1 unit long, the manhole itself on the diagonal is sq. root of 2 (1.414) units long and the cover can be dropped down. A circular one, no matter how you rotate it, both the hole and the cover are always 1 unit wide. Personally, I like the response, "They're covers are round because the manholes themselves are round....duh!"
        • InvaderDem, on 04/03/2008, -0/+0I first read this when I woke up ... and I didn't understand a single word. But now I do.
      • pendrachken, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3A square manhole cover could fall down the hole if it was put, slid, moved somehow so the cover was diagonal across the corners of the hole.
    • haikuFU, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2That is not the only reason. The other reason is that it uses less material than a square one would, and therefore is more economical to manufacture.

      A 2 foot wide square is 4 square feet. A 2 foot wide circle is only 3.14 sq. ft.
    • tobias1482, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1The real reason is that the circle disperses all of the "falling in", from the outside of the hole on the surface, evenly. It's more about the support.
    • diskit, on 04/03/2008, -0/+5Manhole covers are round so that they can EFFECTIVELY COVER THE ROUND MANHOLES
      • senatorpjt, on 04/03/2008, -0/+3I answered this once with "Because you can't drill a square hole". I think it confused the interviewer for a minute.
  • InvaderDem, on 04/03/2008, -1/+8Here's a terrible interview question: "Why do you want to work for us?"
    If your question is anything but "to make money," then you're lying.
    • undersky, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1not true. you can apply to two different jobs paying the same wage, or applying a job that pays the same wage as the current one. many people aspire to work for great companies such as GOOG or CSCO or Deloitte Consulting or Goldman Sachs not because of the money.
      and of course, money is NEVER the only reason. he is not asking you the only reason or obvious one. he is asking you reasons that make you stand out. if you fail to see this and seize the opportunity to talk about how different you are than other people who only care about money, you would never be hired by great companies.
    • bjs3171, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1*****. sometimes, people seek jobs because they're more satisfying, challenging, and creative. and they pay more than your last job.
    • albatross5000, on 04/04/2008, -0/+1InvaderDem don't be retarded. That's probably the dumbest thing I've read today. The decision should (obviously) be based on a combination of things.
  • digezy, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1"Rounded to the nearest thousand, how much have you stolen from each of your previous employers"?
    • yacks, on 04/03/2008, -5/+1lol.. if you stole nothing.. it's still $1,000, no?
    • 4bit, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2negative a hundred thousand if you want to count time I spent driving or in the shower working on projects I wasn't getting paid for.

      But if we're not going to count that, then zero.
      • Kurlumbenus, on 04/03/2008, -0/+1An answer like this shows bitterness and will prevent you from getting hired.
  • BenO169, on 04/03/2008, -9/+3Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

    Doin' your.... son?
    • BobEwell, on 04/03/2008, -0/+03 strikes and your out.
      • chix0r, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2your = posessive or to own something. EX: Your typing skills are disappointing.
        you're = you are. EX: 3 strikes are YOU ARE (you're) out.

  • TheYar, on 04/03/2008, -2/+1Some of those are very useful interview questions.
  • fuzzynyanko, on 04/03/2008, -0/+2#2 is illegal? I've actually have been asked that...
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