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186 Comments
- D4r7h3v1l, on 11/25/2007, -9/+355Don't you mean:
"FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: The 5 Best Things to Say When Caught Sleeping at Your Desk"? - asdfuiop, on 11/25/2007, -10/+299"Sorry, I'm just seriously burnt out from that blunt I had before lunch"
- effinboy, on 11/25/2007, -9/+281or just shout "BACON!" That'll confuse anyone, and they'll just walk away, and hey, maybe bring you back some bacon.
- joemofo214, on 11/25/2007, -11/+219thats why its good to be muslim, bring your rug, and "pray" for 30 minutes
- scootscr15, on 11/25/2007, -16/+165When all else fails, blame the guy that doesn't speak English.
- iCallShotgun, on 11/25/2007, -3/+148"***** hookers keep you up all night don't they"
- dfdemar, on 11/25/2007, -1/+137That's why I sleep in the bathroom.
- inactive, on 11/25/2007, -2/+121now that's the best argument for picking up a religion Ive heard. 30min religious nap ftw
- dattaway, on 11/25/2007, -3/+113"Well, I guess you'll have to fire me."
My boss changed the topic real quick. - arcooke, on 11/25/2007, -0/+72"I'm a lazy employee."
- 1tb0y, on 11/26/2007, -1/+62Only 5? I'll have all these used up by noon tomorrow.
- mrASSMAN, on 11/25/2007, -0/+60"Please don't fire me, it's an addiction"
- AmICoolNow, on 11/25/2007, -7/+67I've always been a fan of "Oh sorry, there's a bug in my eye and I'm trying to suffocate it".
- Pake, on 11/25/2007, -0/+60#3 is pretty similar to one I have. "Shh. Can you hear that clicking sound? It's been driving me nuts all day!"
- Hexoddz, on 11/26/2007, -1/+52>>"They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen."
Damn, and here I was going to say, "They told me at the Sperm Bank this might happen." - ProjectMeat, on 11/25/2007, -1/+51We need more bacon in the workplace. Also, our next president should be "pro-bacon". Then we can snub his detractors as power mongering "anti-bacon" bureaucrats..
- inactive, on 11/25/2007, -1/+51I knew I was going to crash from that meth binge sooner or later
- TaylorSmythe, on 11/26/2007, -1/+50I probably hate you.
- londubh, on 11/26/2007, -0/+47Hey boss, do you want to see naked pictures of your wife?
- MikeonTV, on 11/25/2007, -17/+64But what do I say about spending hours on Digg?
- nottheonlychris, on 11/26/2007, -1/+43The joke will be on him when his boss asks for the report
- sst4ab, on 11/25/2007, -3/+44"Goddamn pop-ups!" oh wait, thats for porn sites.
- inactive, on 11/26/2007, -1/+41QUE?
- sv650touring, on 11/26/2007, -0/+39"I wasn't sleeping, I was... doing a big line of cocaine off of my desk. I knew you wouldn't want me to waste time running to the restroom for that."
- Slog, on 11/26/2007, -0/+38Ah Tibor, how many times have you saved my butt?
- indyGuy, on 11/25/2007, -8/+46My personal fav - "I was up really late working on the big report, boss".
#1 works well too - "amen" - dewyjuhl, on 11/25/2007, -3/+40What will really go down:
Boss: "were you just sleeping at your desk?"
Employee: "oh ah. ee.. NO! Wait! I have to find this completely unrelated article on digg real fast" - mlvassallo, on 11/26/2007, -3/+39Anytime I screw up or get caught goofing off I use the "I guess I'm getting fired then." Then flash my boyish smile. Since I am the only IT guy in the office my job has been pretty secure.
- dvsbastard, on 11/26/2007, -0/+32Tibor is to blame...
- Alex4412, on 11/26/2007, -1/+32My girlfriend told me someone at the Lufthansa ticket counter claimed they were praying. The next day a new rules was instated "You cannot assume any position that might be indicative of sleep."
- c0baltfish, on 11/26/2007, -1/+32That's for sword fighting on roller chairs, not sleeping duh.
- vtruss8, on 11/25/2007, -0/+30yep, no better place to sleep than on the *****.
"I got a real bad case o' diarrhea boss" - mrASSMAN, on 11/25/2007, -0/+30or "mustache."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pbfs2lYM2sQ - inactive, on 11/26/2007, -2/+30"Man, sorry, your wife would not let me get any sleep last night"
- passedoutghost, on 11/25/2007, -1/+29"Raise your head slowly and say, 'in Jesus' name, Amen'" - Probably works especially well in high risk jobs. Like in a nuclear powerplant.
- inactive, on 11/26/2007, -1/+27Or ya know, people sleep because they're tired... Not because they hate their job, necessarily.
- jjb123, on 11/25/2007, -2/+27And when I think real hard my body goes limp, my mom said it was a gift.
- getdiggywitit, on 11/26/2007, -2/+25"wait a minute, were not playing heads up 7up anymore?"
- blankoboy, on 11/26/2007, -1/+21Are you crazy, that's the place where you get paid to masturbate!
- sv650touring, on 11/26/2007, -1/+21Loser? You mean like men who pretend to be women on the internet in order to pimp their skanky swinger site?
- thismortalshade, on 11/26/2007, -0/+19"Sorry, I was up all night researching untraceable firearms." Then do that cheesy gun-finger-point and laugh a little too hard.
- inactive, on 11/25/2007, -4/+21The problem is, you weren't.
- sv650touring, on 11/26/2007, -0/+16I had to watch that like 3 times to wrap my brain around the many layers of weirdness
- Porridge1, on 11/26/2007, -0/+16I was nearly busted sleeping at my desk once. 2 managers approached my chair from behind to ask me something, Luckily I was asleep with a phone headset so I just started going "uh huh, yeah ok that sounds about right" to pretend like I was on some con call :/
- mike81890, on 11/26/2007, -3/+18You win the internet today.
- G-RaZoR, on 11/26/2007, -2/+16Which ironically your comment is not. I mean seriously what the hell is xD?
- inactive, on 11/25/2007, -3/+17flawless victory!
- TerrorByteX, on 11/26/2007, -0/+14Dude, you can only use that until grade 3.
- inactive, on 11/25/2007, -14/+28"1. Raise your head slowly and say, "...in Jesus' name, Amen.""
muahaha
xD
good article. short and to the point xD - criseldav, on 11/26/2007, -5/+18"I like turtles."
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