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How to Keep Your Job in Hard Times
businessweek.com — Don't let the economy push you to the land of rolled-back prices. Avoid a Wal-mart cashier job by following these clever suggestions.
LoriAngel- 512 diggs
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- kavutu, on 08/04/2008, -0/+23ya keep your job by getting pictures of the boss hosing his secretary!!
- guyro, on 08/04/2008, -0/+7Or worse (for him, better for you), pictures of the boss hosing his boss!
- pitchblack16, on 08/04/2008, -0/+42 great ways for keeping your job
- thcobbs, on 08/05/2008, -0/+1^ Unless you were requested to be at the engagements.
- guyro, on 08/04/2008, -0/+7Or worse (for him, better for you), pictures of the boss hosing his boss!
- barbaragordon, on 08/05/2008, -0/+7Be visible only works if you're producing good results though right? :)
- moonchld5, on 08/05/2008, -0/+3Something contradictory in trying to arrange social events and being the life of the party when all of your friends are finding themselves out of a job.
- MeatPlow, on 08/05/2008, -0/+5I just got a job planting tulips on an organ. I start tomorrow!!! I can't wait!!! I hope I don't blow it, I need the money. This recession has really been hard on me.
- Jikul, on 08/05/2008, -9/+4Being an excellent employee usually works.
- NichowA, on 08/05/2008, -2/+7How about "How to Get a Job in Hard Times?"
- dildoolielly, on 08/05/2008, -13/+6---------------"Get a job you lazy ass Liberals!"-------------------
Buddy, I'm glad, really glad that you are not yet affected by the realities of the New economy. It's good to know that someone is doing alright, though a little discouraging how smug so many of them are. But the truth, the verifiable with your senses truth, the truth you just don't want to hear, is that there are lots and lots of people struggling, not because they're lazy, not because they're uneducated, but simply there are just not enough high paying jobs going around for families to face the brave new world of million dollor homes and, overpriced educations, skyrocketing medical expenses and goods and services in a state of long term inflationary creep.
My story is the story of nearly everyone I know who's lost their job in recent years. I can only find a new job if I settle downward on my salary; it's getting genuinely hard to imagine how we're going to get our kid through school, and hard to imagine that whatever education she get's will be worth the job market of deflated expectations that will await her since she won't go to a top of the line school.
We live in a plutocracy. Merit and experience are useless. The public's dreams are popcorn fed with idolatry; athletes with ridiculous salaries lure kids into believing impossible lives can easily be obtained, singers and musicians have no work and can only hope to get picked in a stupid tv roman circus lottery, writers had better be gorgeous and wealthy and ready to crank out crapola to get published and hard working, inventive scientists increasingly find the only work out there involves cranking out worthless trash for corporate propaganda,
Buddy, you can sit there thinking all is well; doesn't affect you. I know the steamroller just hasn't found you yet. Give it time, The system has no place for any but the profoundly corrupt and the self serving wealthy. If you haven't noticed reality, you are might be one of these, but since I encounter you on these boards you are more likely one of the brainwashed zombies who still believe the superwealthy are going to pee some pennies your way. So I suppose you should keep a cup handy for the trickle down.
Me, I'm going to keep trying. But I will not be told by any smug Republican that I cannot point out the nastiness, and call like a plainly see it. If hearing the real story bugs you, there's always total sensory derivation. Nothing will touch you there. Wallow in your lack of feelings.
And then we won't have to listen to you whining about how we're "winning" when all we're doing is speaking aloud that which your political gods would rather remain unsaid.- thcobbs, on 08/05/2008, -2/+4Funny, I've had people calling me up to interview for jobs. There are not shortage of jobs available if you're well educated and have useful skills. I did the most cliche' thing you could imagine as a hichschool senior; I sat down and thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I'd had low-wage manual labor jobs and I knew I didn't want that (weeding cotton with a hoe is a great motivator to not want to be a manual laborer). So, I remembered I liked computers a lot, wanted to work with them in some fashion and found the Computer Engineering major. I went to a public university on student loans and part time work. A year out of school I found my first job, and I've worked my ass off since then, first as a technician, then a validation engineer, then a software engineer, and now (after a change in companies) as a firmware engineer.
I've been employed since I was 16 and damn proud of it. I've never had anyone help me get anything in my life. I earned every bit of it. And that's the way the system is supposed to work. - CHANNELOCK, on 08/05/2008, -2/+1dildoolielly
Good read
the smugness of the college educated neo yuppie laptop hugging Starbucks slurping capitalistic worshiping blowhards gets annoying. - CorpT, on 08/05/2008, -1/+3I'll give you a hint why you can't find a good job - you're a whiner. Quit bitching and start working and you'll probably have a much easier time.
Or... you could blame everything on someone else and wallow in your sorrow.
- thcobbs, on 08/05/2008, -2/+4Funny, I've had people calling me up to interview for jobs. There are not shortage of jobs available if you're well educated and have useful skills. I did the most cliche' thing you could imagine as a hichschool senior; I sat down and thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I'd had low-wage manual labor jobs and I knew I didn't want that (weeding cotton with a hoe is a great motivator to not want to be a manual laborer). So, I remembered I liked computers a lot, wanted to work with them in some fashion and found the Computer Engineering major. I went to a public university on student loans and part time work. A year out of school I found my first job, and I've worked my ass off since then, first as a technician, then a validation engineer, then a software engineer, and now (after a change in companies) as a firmware engineer.
- Vidalsassgirlie, on 08/05/2008, -5/+2How to keep your job in Hard Times: Be indispensable.
If you're really great at what you do and not many other people can do it, you'll keep your job.- MeatPlow, on 08/05/2008, -0/+11That has a downside. If you are indispensable, irreplaceable, you will never be promoted.
- metamethod, on 08/05/2008, -0/+1First, start your own consultancy and promote yourself.
- JKAL, on 08/06/2008, -0/+1in business no one is indispensable, you keep your job by networking with the people who are the movers and the shakers, or by brown nosing to your manager.
If you want a job or you want to keep your job, It always comes down to who you know, not what you know.
- purelithium, on 08/05/2008, -4/+7Join the army.
- swinefever, on 08/05/2008, -0/+13I've been let go from my last 4 jobs on the spin. It's the nature of the technology industry that they hire you when times are good and they dump you when times are bad. How good you are, how indespensable you think you are have nothing to do with it and anyone who thinks it does is just kidding themselves. It's simple economics. When times are tight, get rid of the expensive people, it's the easiest (and laziest) way to cut costs. There's no such thing as a "job for life" anymore. It's not easy - believe me I know - but I stopped worrying about my 'career' the 3rd time it happened and now I just look for a paycheck. These days I'll work anywhere and do anything as long as they pay my rates.
- lead2thehead, on 08/05/2008, -1/+3Well, not exactly. I've been coding for 10 years and have never once been let go. Companies don't just fire "the expensive people". They get rid of the dead weight, starting with the least productive employees and working their way up. And how productive you are is a function of your salary. If you're making $100,000 a year, you had damn well better be doing $100,000 worth of work. Because if there's a guy making $65,000, doing the same quality of work as you, guess which one of you is getting fired first?
- mlavergn, on 08/05/2008, -0/+3Reality is, headcount reduction doesn't simply boil down to who's salary is the highest. Visibility, local labor laws, and your "fit" in the game plan are all more important than the raw salary figure. You have to be perceived as an influencer, productivity is rarely a factor. I've seen incredibly unproductive people who happened to be good PowerPoint jockeys hang onto positions while low visibility but highly productive people didn't fare so well.
- lead2thehead, on 08/05/2008, -1/+3Well, not exactly. I've been coding for 10 years and have never once been let go. Companies don't just fire "the expensive people". They get rid of the dead weight, starting with the least productive employees and working their way up. And how productive you are is a function of your salary. If you're making $100,000 a year, you had damn well better be doing $100,000 worth of work. Because if there's a guy making $65,000, doing the same quality of work as you, guess which one of you is getting fired first?
- Sarevok9, on 08/05/2008, -0/+21To paraphrase the article:
Be the douchebag that EVERYONE but the boss hates, and you'll be fine.- flashback99, on 08/05/2008, -0/+4everyone's got at least one douchebag like this in their office.
- dshPls, on 08/05/2008, -0/+5And if you can't name the person it's probably you.
- flashback99, on 08/05/2008, -0/+4everyone's got at least one douchebag like this in their office.
- eliasg, on 08/05/2008, -2/+1The lady in the video reminds me of Dr. Cuddy.
- enjoyvelvet, on 08/05/2008, -1/+0Dr. Cutty is so hot
- halaric, on 08/05/2008, -0/+5Don't spend the whole day checking digg.
- charlietuna, on 08/05/2008, -0/+6Clever suggestions? I would hardly think "work your ass off" was especially clever, just desperate.
- IH8PS3, on 08/05/2008, -3/+2you keep you job by not being a retard!! saying things lik " i h8 work" and " don't touch me.. sexual harrasment"
show some clevage , tuck up that skirt!! you'll keep your job . pussy cats!!
you digg? - WorldWidePR, on 08/05/2008, -6/+0Suggest the company uses Print Manager Plus by Software Shelf to drastically reduce paper and toner costs too. http://www.softwareshelf.com That'll keep you your job! It increases the bottom line just like the lady said.
- lead2thehead, on 08/05/2008, -1/+0I hope you die in a fire.
- NewSearchEngine, on 08/05/2008, -1/+1If you want to keep your job, be a nice person in your work place.
But I have seen more layoffs with the closure the department, a site with everybody has to go. - salomejones, on 08/05/2008, -1/+1Ha ha ha. Executives are scared. It's about ***** time.
- HoratioHellpop, on 08/05/2008, -1/+2Rule 1. Don't be a douche.
Rule 2. See Rule 1. - jabbajabba, on 08/05/2008, -1/+0Nice perl necklace.
- Tawni, on 08/05/2008, -1/+3Sorry but in these economic times these tips will not work. More people are likely to face a downsizing and no matter who you are or how you behave when your department is eliminated or a certain percentage of your company goes you are basically screwed.
What I can suggest is to get out and VOTE if you vote and voice your opinion then you can affect change so the next President does not screw the economy again. - brettg102, on 08/05/2008, -0/+2...we've hired 8 people in my department this week and I've gotten a pay raise in the last month. It's good to be in a field with a shortage, increased demand, and an aging about-to-retire work force.
- CHANNELOCK, on 08/05/2008, -3/+1Play off your token humble but don't give a ***** Whiteness.
You see
I work for a semi Government organization with a workforce of.
8 blacks
2 women
1 Asian
2 Hispanics
1 jew
1 mixed
Now I being a subservient politically correct mechanically oriented white guy with tools and jeans. I play off my last of the Mohican blue collar whiteness.
They need me as a token of things gone past.
You can survive if you keep your cool,Ive seen 95% of the workforce vanish in a few years but still I endure .- kaosethema, on 08/09/2008, -0/+1oh, poor white man, descendant of slaves and conquered peoples... boohoo.... your survival gives hope to all the non-oppressed
- lorenmccray, on 08/05/2008, -0/+1be better than the guy/gal next to you, and make/save the company money. not rocket science,
- godseyeview, on 08/05/2008, -0/+2Dont waste time on DIgg when you should be working.
- tomarocco, on 08/05/2008, -0/+2Looks like you're next.
- MeatPlow, on 08/06/2008, -0/+1None of my time on Digg is ever wasted. I love you all.
- vinnybale4, on 08/05/2008, -0/+0I'm getting my first real job at the age of sixteen, i'm ready to put things aside and save for college, but hearing things like this. I'm afraid that i'll get laid off. or in the future.
I hope the economy shapens up by the time I'm older.
:(- tomarocco, on 08/05/2008, -0/+2Your life is bigger and more important than any economic trend. Don't let it hamper your dreams.
- Jared80KA, on 08/05/2008, -0/+21. Work for an oil company.
- ciphersort, on 08/06/2008, -0/+0Some really great ideas people DIGG is impressive! Especially the work really hard bits... yeah. Anyway... um, you could just eliminate the competition. Running down humans with automobiles is a good way to handle... those in your way. Put those Hummers to good use, I hear they are going extinct (which means soon I will be able to afford one) Hmmm... just imagine... Jobical™ assassinations. Jobical™ not to be confused or affiliated with jobical.com ( that is owned by ATLANTIS Consulting SA) in any way whatsoever outside of this sentence.
Ignore me I'm crazy. - kaosethema, on 08/09/2008, -0/+11. point out every other employees disadvantages in front of everyone
2. act like you're the boss when the boss is away
3. kiss the bosses ass but kiss your boss's boss's ass even harder
4. sleep with bosses of other departments to ensure a switch should your department be shutdown
5. get drunk at parties and display various parts of your body to your male co-workers and then cry "RAPE" when they finally try to touch the goods
6. intimidate the weak into following you no matter where.
7. bring donuts at random intertvals
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