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How You Can Become 'The Dark Knight' - For Only $7.4 Million

chicagotribune.com — *****

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  • ditka354, on 07/23/2008, -2/+114How much is it to actually get Michael Caine as your butler, because that is what I really want.
    • MrBatguy, on 07/23/2008, -5/+6Totally!
    • Godlike, on 07/23/2008, -7/+5It costs somewhere in the range of RTFA
      • error2k2, on 07/23/2008, -0/+5Caine wouldn't be happy with the lousy amount some f**king article recommends.
    • MOJIRA, on 07/23/2008, -0/+11English butlers are great, but Alfred is the *****, especially Michael Caine Alfred.

      Love that part where he twirls his hand signaling for the Russian dancer to flip over for a suntan lotion rub down.
      • mooseofshadows, on 07/23/2008, -0/+4"Are you sure you'll be alright alfred?"

        "If you could tell me the russian for 'apply your own bloody suntan lotion'"
    • MavRevMatt, on 07/23/2008, -1/+1
      • guinpen, on 07/23/2008, -0/+2he was asking how much it would be to get the actual actor that played alfred himself. the article only talks about a butler like alfred
  • jenel, on 07/23/2008, -0/+56Mmmm, HTML tags in title...
    • ColonelTribune, on 07/23/2008, -3/+14Om nom nom.
      • acmaurer, on 07/23/2008, -2/+5The Colonel knows what "nom" means? Woooah
    • MASH007, on 07/23/2008, -0/+5Thinkin the same thing. Maybe Chicago tribune would like to hire me for some programming tips.
    • rpgmaker, on 07/23/2008, -0/+1Someone ***** up.
  • ColonelTribune, on 07/23/2008, -2/+18One front page of the Chicago Tribune, for good taste: 75 cents.

    Making the Dark Knight more dapper: priceless.
  • mofo269, on 07/23/2008, -0/+14I don't want the full costume, but I would love the cape!
    • acmaurer, on 07/23/2008, -0/+5Well that's easy enough! At least it won't cost you $7 million!
    • megamod, on 07/23/2008, -0/+6They're forgetting that the Batman cape isn't made of regular fabric. It has the memory fabric that is fire proof. No way you can get one that does all that for their quoted price.
  • 4sakenaiden, on 07/23/2008, -0/+45anybody got an extra $2million?

    I could use that Batmobile to get over traffic in the morning
    • ericisroot, on 07/23/2008, -0/+1I think the batpod would be easier and cheaper. Also with gas prices these days I think the batpod gets better fuel economy than the batmobile.
      • directive0, on 07/23/2008, -0/+1Wouldn't the Tumbler take JET-A anyhow?
      • dajuggernaut, on 07/23/2008, -0/+9I think that if you can pony up the $1.9million to buy a tumbler.. I don't think that $4/gallon of gas is going to be a deal breaker..
  • MrBatguy, on 07/23/2008, -0/+26It actually costs more than this, plus the time investment is un-real. Trust a bat brother. And it does terrible things to your mood because you're always dealing with the worst of humanity -- and often you're doing it while wearing tights that creep up. I could go on and on.
  • StarWarsFan, on 07/23/2008, -3/+17How can I become Superman?
    • acmaurer, on 07/23/2008, -0/+15Let's tackle how to be super one hero at a time
      • mjhamilton, on 07/23/2008, -1/+2You can't tackle a superhero. That is why they are super.
    • ohnoerino, on 07/23/2008, -0/+10Blue unitard, red tighties, and a can of Dapper Dan.
      • acmaurer, on 07/23/2008, -0/+6Flying lessons too! And don't forget the oh-so-clever disguise of being a newspaper reporter - with glasses!
    • Tddupre, on 07/23/2008, -1/+10LSD makes u fly
    • NyteStarNyne, on 07/23/2008, -6/+3Learn to be a ***** sucking pussy ass bitch.
      • MysticSavage, on 07/23/2008, -0/+4Well, you're already half way there.
      • FortyCaliber, on 07/23/2008, -0/+3And whiny, don't forget whiny.
    • AlphAssassin, on 07/23/2008, -2/+1Close your eyes and suck on this hose and you will gain all of superman's powers.
  • MacBookForMe, on 07/23/2008, -0/+7would do it for much less, anytime
  • KurtangleTN, on 07/23/2008, -8/+3I'm Batman
  • akeosh, on 07/23/2008, -11/+1Who needs batman when you have Wolverine
  • mywhitenoise, on 07/23/2008, -2/+46I left that movie wanting to be The Joker.
    • Mr.Gone, on 07/23/2008, -5/+6Start with the OD.
    • scubaman5000, on 07/23/2008, -4/+16Watch me make this pencil disappear
    • y3rt, on 07/23/2008, -7/+2why so serious?
    • UserNull, on 07/23/2008, -1/+2Same, and I think it's decidedly cheeper as well.
    • MOJIRA, on 07/23/2008, -1/+2There was this kid dressed like the Joker at IMAX premiere I was at. He didn't talk and he look pretty freaky in the dark.

      Also, after the movie he was standing right behind me as I was trying to take a leak at a urinal. I half expected him to say "why so serious?"
      • FortyCaliber, on 07/23/2008, -1/+8"Do you know how I got these scars on my...
        PENIS!"
    • Erebos, on 07/23/2008, -1/+5Gunpowder and gasoline are much cheaper
  • Farik, on 07/23/2008, -5/+10As much as Batman is awesome, that was a terrible digg submission.
  • xsecretfiles, on 07/23/2008, -2/+20Just remember kids! don't beat up your mom or sister
    • MOJIRA, on 07/23/2008, -0/+2_Verbal_ assault.
      • FortyCaliber, on 07/23/2008, -0/+3Of course!
        HE was going to yell at them, but decided to hit them because as the PSA says: "Words hit harder than fists."
  • ericisroot, on 07/23/2008, -0/+7How much does it cost to hire a business manager like Lucius Fox?
    • FortyCaliber, on 07/23/2008, -0/+4And a magic "fab up anything your heart desires" R&D department?
  • slsashrk, on 07/23/2008, -2/+0I'd have to up that to 7.5 million... in order to pay for the bat liposuction to loose the bat buddha belly. :(
    • dc5mike, on 07/23/2008, -0/+1You mean, munchies belly? I love that green too!
  • presidentjapan, on 07/23/2008, -8/+22bury me
  • neems25, on 07/23/2008, -7/+1What about a voice coach to create that dark batman voice? How much do THOSE mofos cost?
    • Mr.Gone, on 07/23/2008, -3/+3Just take a fistfull of cotton and jam it up your nose. Then you too can sound ridiculous.
  • BradOFarrell, on 07/23/2008, -3/+2I'm secretly hoping this movie will inspire some real life masked vigilantes that AREN'T just losers in cosplay walking around giving heat packs to homeless people, like Indianapolis's Mr Silent. The whole point of wearing a mask and fighting crime is to beat up strangers without due process and escape the legal consequence. C'monnnn. Someone do that. It'd be awesome. If this movie doesn't inspire it maybe Watchmen will...
  • petaganayr, on 07/23/2008, -2/+1Who cares? (but CrossFit works...I've been doing it since last year)
  • neems25, on 07/23/2008, -6/+1What about a voice coach to help create that deep Batman voice? How much do THOSE mofos cost?
  • chasenyc, on 07/23/2008, -1/+6Shameless advertising in the second half of those images
  • Vasant56, on 07/23/2008, -0/+5Clicking "next" every paragraph is too damn annoying.
  • djfreex, on 07/23/2008, -1/+5Forget Bat-Suit, I want the suit in Crysis. How much for that?
  • PolishLogic, on 07/23/2008, -0/+15You can become the Joker by spending about $50 at your local pharmacy.
    • MysticSavage, on 07/23/2008, -0/+8Don't forget you'll have to buy a few pencils at Staples.

      Ta da!
  • JBrown99, on 07/23/2008, -0/+4$2,500 for the stainless steel bat logo? Are you freakin' kidding me? A machine shop would probably make that for under $100.
    • cmakvaca, on 07/23/2008, -0/+6yeah, and he could probably just drive an armored Camry, but Batman doesn't penny-pinch
    • wiggles, on 07/24/2008, -0/+1It all depends on how accurate you want it. Any idiot with a blowtorch can cut a bat out of sheet metal. Want it CNC machined on 1/4" stainless? That'll cost ya.
  • disoriented, on 07/23/2008, -0/+1Honestly all I really want is a memory cloth cape like his..***** squirrel suits I really want to be able to glide like batman. Lame. Buried.
  • gobbstopp, on 07/23/2008, -0/+13so... $3 million so you can own a bat exhibit??
    3 of the 7 million - for bats?! bruce wayne merely accepts bats now, doesn't need a ***** private showroom for them
  • ltethe, on 07/23/2008, -0/+5Surprisingly affordable.
  • Vennem, on 07/23/2008, -0/+0Did the image of the "rubber" bat in the last pic, show it's junk?
  • mandarin, on 07/23/2008, -0/+1Yeah sure, 5k for a rubberized costume without glider capabilities.
  • 2h3px, on 07/23/2008, -0/+2And now we know what Bill Gates is gonna do after retirement.
  • madmondo, on 07/23/2008, -2/+2Bruce Wayne is afraid of bats.
  • Evolutuon, on 07/23/2008, -1/+4I can do the joker's voice pretty well. All I really need is a good costume for this year's halloween parties.

    And knives, cant forget knives.
    • azyfz, on 07/23/2008, -1/+0...And pocket lint
    • sture, on 07/23/2008, -0/+5Don't forget a pencil.
    • Nukingtoolbox, on 07/23/2008, -1/+0Don't forget a fake pocket-watch, full of an ignition to blow a building from top-to-bottom!
  • Cyberdelight, on 07/24/2008, -0/+0Who needs a gym when you have a suit like that?
  • MCam, on 07/24/2008, -0/+1I wonder how much it costs to become the Joker.
  • darkfog13, on 08/04/2008, -1/+0hey everyone i am actually going through with this thing i wont say ho i am or how i am going to do it i just need peoples help with how to do it
  •  

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