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The iPod engravings that went wrong. [Pics]

methodshop.com — As you may know, you can order an iPod from the Apple Store with a custom, laser-engraved message. However, not everything gets engraved. Apple has been rejecting some messages for editorial reasons. The following is a collection of engravings that were actually rejected by Apple, and some that probably should have been. Enjoy!

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  • Eslamicolt3, on 11/23/2007, -4/+246"Trapped in iPod Factory. Please send help"
    That's pretty good
  • Kyrgizion, on 11/23/2007, -13/+23029 diggs, one comment, 10$ webserver => dead
  • joemofo214, on 11/23/2007, -35/+7tom cruise kills 3rd world children
  • supremespleen, on 11/23/2007, -32/+937 Diggs and down.
    Perhaps they should engrave a duggmirror link?
  • ruddy, on 11/23/2007, -31/+4methODshop.com

    great...
  • invectivelover, on 11/23/2007, -26/+4Dead after 37 diggs...
  • Snoius, on 11/23/2007, -24/+2And.... its down.
  • RuckusNutz, on 11/23/2007, -26/+3MACHINE DOWN!!!
  • QuickSurfer, on 11/23/2007, -26/+2dugg to death after 37 diggs
  • munky100, on 11/23/2007, -7/+161* sighs *
    http://64.233.169.104/search?q=cache:lv4kXsETjrYJ: ...
  • LittleDas, on 11/23/2007, -24/+4Down at 41 diggs.
    Wow.
    • Amplix, on 11/23/2007, -13/+5damn you people...

      Diggs ≠ Page Views!
      • thetinguy, on 11/23/2007, -9/+5Who gives a *****? Honestly, one of the most useless comments ever.
        • andrewry, on 11/24/2007, -2/+5And saying it is down contributes so much to Digg!
  • BlueStreak69, on 11/23/2007, -9/+6"Wrong Side"
    I would have put that on mine but mine was a gift.
  • morninglorii, on 11/23/2007, -5/+22Looks like Apple's legal team has attacked their servers.
  • rafaelmillan, on 11/23/2007, -10/+1The server that went wrong
    http://209.85.135.104/search?q=cache:lv4kXsETjrYJ: ...
  • GeekSwag, on 11/23/2007, -4/+377As you may know, you can order an iPod from the Apple Store with a custom, laser-engraved message. However, not everything gets engraved. Apple has been rejecting some messages for editorial reasons.

    The following is a collection of engravings that were actually rejected by Apple, and some that probably should have been. Enjoy!

    * 10,000 Stolen Tunes Inside* ~Anonymous
    * Not to be used as a suppository.* ~Umbralkin
    * I cost more than three hookers.* ~Umbralkin
    * When my battery dies, so will you.* ~Umbralkin
    * Not responsible for prolonged damage to the ear & brain.* ~Anonymous
    * iPod Limited Edition: Retard Compatible. * ~Jimmy4Kim
    * Rip, Mix, & Burn Down RIAA Headquarters* ~Anonymous
    * Cocaine and razor blade not included.* ~Carl
    * Lick My Shiny Metal Ass* ~Anonymous
    * karma is a bitch* ~Anonymous
    * Bad Mother ****** (settled with "Bad Mother *****) ~Ben
    * Something small & white that Enrique Eglasias Isn't In.* ~wiredgargoyle
    * I play with myself.* ~ leonardom
    * Steal this? Will self destruct when used.* ~Anonymous
    * iMasturbate five times a day* ~rjones
    * F uck Osama.* ~Anonymous
    * Screwing The RIAA One Download At A Time* ~Mike P.
    * I cost more per ounce than cocaine.* ~dgcole
    * This iPod will self destruct in 1 year.* ~dale
    * Practice safe sex... Go FU*K yourself!* ~whocares590
    * Controls on reverse side, you STUPID FCUK!* ~Christiaan



    THE FOLLOWING WERE NOT REJECTED, BUT STILL VERY CLEVER and/or FUNNY

    * "One time at band camp." ~JLOVE
    * 49 20 66 75 63 6b 69 6e 67 72 75 6c 65 ~TehSnarf
    (translation: I ***** rule in HEX)
    * I don't need good taste, I've got selection.~Umbralkin
    * Kiss me, I've got Irish music.~Umbralkin
    * "To all the Chinese children who made my iPod, Thanks!" ~ Plaid Speed
    * George Bush Hates Black People ~Kayne West
    * fatti i cazzi tuoi (Mind your own f-ing business) ~gatherings
    * I Don't Do Windows ~Anonymous
    * Trapped in iPod factory. Please send help ~Pheenix
    * Me vs. RIAA: Exhibit A ~ukealii50
    * My other iPod is a Millenium Falcon ~commongiga
    * Steal At Your Own Risk. Bomb Installed ~Nick A.
    * Tom Cruise is a couch humping ***** ~Anonymous
    * Mic0s0f7 5ux a$$ ~Anonymous
    * I may be small and white but at least I've got a big disk! ~Jesse S.
    * Don't fsck with me or: $find / -name u | /dev/null
    * Scratch your balls, not my metal. ~Anonymous
    * Who said Apple sucks? ~Jaeboy
    * Save water, drink beer and shower together ~ Jquinn825
    * Now you have two little white pocket rockets.
    * People will pay more to be entertained than educated. ~DulceDLeche16
    * WARNING: Contains Yanni Box Set
    * 10,000 reasons to ignore my wife
    * If only women's buttons were this easy to push.
    * This iPod makes up for my small hard disk.
    * Once you go small and white... ~Anonymous
    * 98% Liberace-free
    * Harmful If Swallowed
    * Dear [insert name], Thanks for the iPod idea. Steve Jobs ~IFC1
    * I'm so trendy look at my white headphones! ~sjs
    * Size Does Matter ~Anonymous
    * Musically Disturbed ~Joe F.
    * Weapons of Mass Distraction Inside ~wiredgargoyle
    * Contents Under Pressure from RIAA ~wiredgargoyle
    * My other handheld is a PocketPC ~vostinar
    * CDs are for amish people! ~mustachioman
    * Quarter free jukebox ~mustachioman
    * FCUK WINDOWS ~lancew
    * Why drink and drive, When you can smoke and fly. ~tipx
    * I last 8 hrs. You last 2 minutes. Who's the man?
    * My iPod can beat up your honor roll student
    * Your mamma uses a walkman.
    * "Say hello to my little friend" ~iiikora
    * FCUK THE SHUFFLE, WTF I Ordered a 60 Gigger! ~dilpreet64



    Here's another one that requires a few extra brain cells.

    Gopz tbzpj dhz hss zavklu.
    for(;;i++)d[i]=d[i]%26+65;

    If you use the first line, as the input for the second line. It produces the text "This music was all stolen" in plain english. ~asterisk
    • meez, on 11/23/2007, -4/+22"Lick My Shiny Metal Ass"

      Omg! How can they even think about rejecting that? :(
      • RajDhillon, on 11/23/2007, -1/+58Maybe because it's supposed to be "Bite my shiny metal ass"
        • meez, on 11/24/2007, -1/+12My reading comprehension has failed me. The shame!
      • LeeSoong, on 11/24/2007, -5/+6iCost $400 and still have no FM Radio !
    • mywhitenoise, on 11/23/2007, -8/+66"one time, at band camp"
      ...that ***** was never funny, and I wish that movie never existed.
      • yoinkdigg, on 11/23/2007, -21/+7I'm sure your mother feels the same way about you.
    • spod111, on 11/23/2007, -0/+34for(;;i++)d[i]=d[i]%26+65;
      No use dude - infinite loop. Don't look at it or you'll be trapped there forever!
      • aloser, on 11/24/2007, -1/+4Segfault
      • user, on 11/25/2007, -0/+1#include
        #include
        int main()
        {
        int i = 0;
        char d[] = "Gopztbzpjdhzhsszavslu";
        for( ; i < strlen(d) ;i++)
        {
        printf("%c", d[i] % 26 + 65);
        }
        }
    • jiveturkeyblues, on 11/23/2007, -13/+6wow, none of those were funny.
  • alexkorova, on 11/23/2007, -24/+3Ehm, mirror please?
  • arichard, on 11/23/2007, -14/+50hm... not that funny :-/
  • Carsonauto, on 11/23/2007, -15/+14Someone caught it:
    http://www.methodshop.com.nyud.net:8090/games/play ...
    • hockeyrox20120, on 11/23/2007, -27/+1Your gay
      • saifatlast, on 11/23/2007, -1/+27His gay what? INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW!
      • MacParrot, on 11/24/2007, -4/+8So in other words, hockey is a homophobe AND stupid. Two things that really always seem to go together.
  • UndeadOverlord, on 11/23/2007, -14/+2I can has Mirror?
  • DEFSMAC, on 11/23/2007, -12/+21some of those are pretty clever. still like mine better though - i follow trends.
  • ryglha, on 11/23/2007, -8/+3google image search found the pics. http://images.google.ca/images?hl=en&q=%22rejected ...
  • Dylson, on 11/23/2007, -44/+3sr;jfriowejr8frioew8rpqewury89283428094328709342879342;hefefkjlwefrejuierw8up438p94328943283428093428093420983480934ohjdfhjdfhjd
  • candyman682, on 11/23/2007, -8/+23i like "10,000 stolen songs inside"
  • l00s3r, on 11/23/2007, -1/+160How about, "This engraving has lowered my resale value".
    • drakethegreat, on 11/24/2007, -5/+2Naw cause the disk will fail and when they replace it you loose the engraving.
  • naturemade, on 11/23/2007, -3/+66"Trapped in iPod Factory. Please send help" -- I really like this one.
  • johnn11238, on 11/23/2007, -17/+3Not real. Not funny.
  • munky100, on 11/23/2007, -15/+20http://www.d8i.com/myipod.jpg
    • ImWatchingYou, on 11/24/2007, -3/+31Someone sucks at photoshop.
      • dumbland, on 11/24/2007, -8/+0That probably explains why it isn't photoshopped then.
      • lawrencegold, on 11/24/2007, -10/+0Or someone (you) sucks at discerning the difference between a Photoshopped image and the real thing. I've seen the iPod in person, and it's real.
      • sst4ab, on 11/24/2007, -1/+4its been edited for sure. look for the serial number.
        • dumbland, on 11/24/2007, -1/+0There's a difference between blacking out the identifiable serial number and photoshopping in the engraving.

          The engraving is genuine.
  • mrmacky, on 11/23/2007, -5/+9I liked all the ones hating on the RIAA

    "Contents under pressure from RIAA"
    and
    "10,000 stolen songs" are two of my favs. Now I need to go buy an engraving.
  • porch88, on 11/23/2007, -3/+62In case my iPod was stolen, I tried to make the thief feel bad by engraving "Exodus 20:15" on it it. The verse is "Thou shalt not steal."

    I'm sure it wouldn't have worked though.
  • teddyrux, on 11/23/2007, -6/+3Mine says, "I wasted time and now doth time waste me."
  • madcat1212, on 11/23/2007, -7/+11Those weren't very funny.
    • sl123000, on 11/24/2007, -3/+9Yeah...they were, you just don't have a sense of humor.
  • redxii, on 11/23/2007, -5/+97"Mic0s0f7 5ux a$$"

    How's that clever and/or funny, and who's Micosoft?
    • aazn, on 11/24/2007, -13/+1Shu the ***** up you know what it meant.
  • tmoney578, on 11/23/2007, -1/+13groan... half of these are all sex/masturbation jokes.
  • yourmightyruler, on 11/23/2007, -10/+5Mirror: http://www.methodshop.com.nyud.net:8090/games/play ...
  • SEANWOOKIE, on 11/24/2007, -1/+19I like "Property of Mitchell Henderson." the best.
  • serra, on 11/24/2007, -0/+6I can't believe they would have the audacity to refuse anything that anyone wanted on there. Someone is paying money for the item and writing, so who gives a ***** if they want something "not pc" or whatever on there?
    • JudgeMonkey, on 11/24/2007, -2/+2Well, I do agree, but really they are the ones doing the engraving. There is nothing stopping you from having it done somewhere else.
  • DaleoftheUK, on 11/24/2007, -0/+18* This iPod will self destruct in 1 year.* ~dale

    Word.
  • Bling4u, on 11/24/2007, -10/+2I can has iPod?
  • nunofgs, on 11/24/2007, -0/+8"If found unattended,
    avenge my death!"
  • Subterfug, on 11/24/2007, -6/+59I know what would make a good engraving...

    09-f9-11-02-9d-74-e3-5b-d8-41-56-c5-63-56-88-c0
    • VanD, on 11/24/2007, -19/+3Why would that make a good engraving?
      • benjic, on 11/24/2007, -0/+28Its the HD-DVD Hex Processing Key
        If you visit this site called digg you ca.... wait a sec, you don't know what that is?
        • VanD, on 11/26/2007, -3/+1I know what it is, but still who the ***** cares.
          "OMG HEY LOOK AT ME, I HAVE THE HD-DVD CODE ON MY IPOD! I'M A ***** LEET HAXOR!"
          STFU bitch
      • JudgeMonkey, on 11/24/2007, -3/+1Yeah, we know what the number is. Why would you rip an HD movie to an ipod? Kind of a waste of space, no? It's not relevant on an ipod really.
        • ChromaVita, on 11/24/2007, -0/+3No, but if you had a movie that you only had on HD DVD, couldn't you rip it, then shrink it down to ipod size? It's a stretch, but still relevant.
        • ChromaVita, on 11/24/2007, -0/+2LOL! A DOUBLE POST! AND NO WAY TO DELETE IT! I'M GOING TO SCREEN CAP THIS AND POST IT IN THE PICTURES SECTION!

          I'll take "Things that are wrong with Digg" for $300 Alex.
    • Vorin, on 11/24/2007, -3/+2google "internet protest digg" and find out.
    • qbelek2, on 11/24/2007, -0/+1you do not even know what to do with it...
  • Tiesto, on 11/24/2007, -7/+1Bunch of crap - buried.
    • JudgeMonkey, on 11/24/2007, -0/+3If you hadn't posted this comment though, we wouldn't be able to bury it. Is this what is known as a self fulfilling prophecy?
  • gothicform, on 11/24/2007, -13/+7So Apple are actually so controlling they decide what people can and cannot have on their ipods. That's nice. I thought the customer was always right but clearly the reality distortion field trumps it every time.
  • sfinney180, on 11/24/2007, -2/+9"what can i say zunes are getting harder to find"
  • benjic, on 11/24/2007, -1/+5So, I would just go to a third party laser engraver. You could sell the iPods that have banned engravings.
  • krunk4ever, on 11/24/2007, -6/+1MIRROR:
    http://www.methodshop.com.nyud.net:8080/games/play ...
    http://www.methodshop.com.nyud.net:8090/games/play ...
  • lamer, on 11/24/2007, -1/+6A wedding proposal -- an engraved iPod -- what could go wrong?
    http://www.bittlucky.com/adnstory.php
  • segiterrus, on 11/24/2007, -2/+3i still dont get it? wheres the misprint?
  • andycr512, on 11/24/2007, -0/+26I was hoping it was cases where the engraving machine went insane and made strange-looking engravings.
  • drizzlelicious, on 11/24/2007, -3/+5"My other iPod is a Millenium Falcon"

    Dugg
  • ath1337, on 11/24/2007, -1/+1"Why drink and drive, When you can smoke and fly"
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