digg

Join DiggAbout

Discover the best of the web!
Learn more about Digg by taking the tour.

See the original image at macenstein.com

Behold! The best description of an iPhone game… ever

macenstein.com — ...read the following description of the iPhone game Oxxo, and tell me if you are any clearer on the finer points of gameplay after you have read it. Wow. Every line is gold.

Bury
show profanity settings
expand all
  • jaredcat, on 08/02/2008, -34/+8thats dumb
    • chazuk, on 08/02/2008, -2/+19That's dumb.
    • Games4Life, on 08/03/2008, -5/+4NO U
    • n3wt0n, on 08/03/2008, -0/+4i agree with em who cares jus because theres nothing interesting doesnt mean u go pull out product descriptions.
  • frontporsche, on 08/02/2008, -5/+287Getting your iPhone app approved isn't very hard, it seems.
    • Buzzpatrol, on 08/02/2008, -0/+35You mean that it is no hard for apple to get you game for price?
    • milkmage, on 08/02/2008, -1/+49you never know. that could be the 10th or 12th iteration of the description. Apple just said ***** - APPROVED.

      • Dotcommer, on 08/02/2008, -0/+40Clearly, the object of the game is if your win move will make to gain also the adversary, will have lost!
      • Istrancis, on 08/02/2008, -1/+7@Dotcommer

        Well done on offering a clear explanation, good sir!
      • gregdogum, on 08/03/2008, -1/+15we'll do it live!!

        sorry, i couldnt resist.
    • pwnies, on 08/02/2008, -0/+27It's a puzzle game. Obviously the description should be a puzzle as well, thus, approved!
    • wibambau, on 08/03/2008, -0/+4must.. resist.. urge.. to.. estimate.. my.. quotient.. of.. learning..
  • zephc, on 08/02/2008, -13/+226Language: Engrish
    • xwater, on 08/03/2008, -9/+3raise ur hand if u went back to see if it actually said engrish.... /raise hand
    • Elliuotatar, on 08/03/2008, -0/+4Translation:

      It's a combination of tic-tac toe and connect four, where each piece has opposing colors and symbols on each side. The object is to get four in a row of the same color or symbol. Each player takes turns either placing pieces, or flipping them, so that an X bcomes an O, or a green piece becomes an orange.

      (If you look closely you'll note the symbols on the faces also alternate between yellow and blue regardless of face color, so there are probably three ways to win.)

      The instructions also appear to warn you that if you flip a piece, and your move would result in a tie, you lose.
    • JKAL, on 08/03/2008, -5/+1I can understand this game description been difficult to understand for those people whose second language is English,
      however for people whose 1st language is English this should be a breeze to understand, although it is incorrectly structure it is not hard to understand, unless of course you are either too stupid to understand your own language or your are so stuck up your ass you would not understand it unless it was all Proper Queen's English and NOTHING else.
      Grow up and give people a chance.
    • Commodore84, on 08/04/2008, -1/+1www.engrish.com for the uninitiated.
    • Commodore84, on 08/04/2008, -1/+1Sorry, http://www.engrish.com I didn't realize links without the www weren't clickable.
  • MtheoryX, on 08/02/2008, -23/+1INB4 "All your base..."
  • l800LEMMINGS, on 08/02/2008, -9/+3i see Charlie Kelly wrote the description
  • Rikkochet, on 08/02/2008, -12/+98For $3.99 a pop you'd think they could at least have spent an extra 20 minutes in Google Translate massaging the syntax.
    • Mootabolife, on 08/02/2008, -1/+127Did you miss all of the exclamation points in the summary?

      "If your win move will make to gain also the adversary, will have lost!"

      That ***** is urgent.
      • aznpwnzor, on 08/02/2008, -5/+3If miss points exclaiming in summary you will that is urgent to *****!
      • krete, on 08/03/2008, -2/+3Well played
    • tidu, on 08/02/2008, -6/+1well, It's apparent that the authors just used a translator, so they would have no way to convey the objective of the game to Apple. And nobody can understand the current description, so...
      • aladrin, on 08/02/2008, -2/+9I'm guessing you haven't used auto-translators much. That is not how it comes out. This was done by a human.
    • darkciti2, on 08/03/2008, -0/+17How could they massage the the syntax if they don't know what they're reading (English)?

      That would be like you having google translate something to Chinese/Mandarin and then "massaging" Googles output so it sounds more coherent to a Chinese speaker.
      • samard2002, on 08/03/2008, -0/+14No kidding.

        I don't know which is more retarded: the guy who thinks you can "massage" syntax in a web translator with no knowledge of the language or the 59 people that dugg him up in agreement.

        Digg, sometimes you're so Dumm.

    • marksman7328, on 08/03/2008, -1/+1Nah, even Google Translate does better than this on its first try.
      • ShakeWell, on 08/04/2008, -0/+1Maybe this was Multiple tries, you know... Japanese > English > Chinese > English > ??? > Profit!
  • danielsamuels, on 08/02/2008, -2/+56Does anyone have an English translation of that?
    • diggPPT, on 08/02/2008, -1/+118"All your $3.99 belong to us"
    • conostrov, on 08/02/2008, -0/+40:) you know it is bad when you can read through that no problem.

      :: Debuting: Oxxo, a line game that tests your intelligence.

      In the game, the player is able to put down a chip or flip his opponents. Flipping only changes their symbol for yours. There is however, an added challenge is in how a players colors and symbols are played, one needs to match these in order to win. Also a note, be advised that winning in a way that allows both players to win will be counted as a loss for you.

      The game previews 10 levels, demonstrating style form notice right on through to expert.As well, scores measure a variety of elements including time, moves played, best played, ect. in order to give you a better idea of how your progressing.
      • Ignignokt01, on 08/03/2008, -2/+12STILL a lot of spelling/grammar errors, lol
      • ophello, on 08/03/2008, -3/+7FAIL.

        Here's a better one:

        Oxxo is simple: you are pitted against your opponent as you put down a chip or flip theirs, thereby changing their symbol for yours. There is, however, an added challenge: the chips' colors and symbols must match in order to win. Furthermore, winning in a way that allows both players to win will be counted as a loss for you.

        The game has 10 levels, ranging from "novice" to "expert". Additionally, Oxxo features post-game statistics including game time, moves played, best played, ect. in order for you to track your progress.
      • BowieX, on 08/03/2008, -0/+3Ect....oplasm?
  • gabrielbeug, on 08/02/2008, -6/+158At least it will put to hard tries your intelligence!
  • mookiemoomoo, on 08/02/2008, -3/+60Can someone lend me $4 to get this?
    • orangefly, on 08/02/2008, -0/+36sure....what's your paypal address....???....
      and when will i get this back....???....
      • mookiemoomoo, on 08/02/2008, -0/+29oxxo@oxxo.com and can I pay you 5c a week?
      • geneusutwerk, on 08/03/2008, -0/+6Go for the subprime rate, I hear its awesome.
    • aznpwnzor, on 08/02/2008, -2/+5wait but what's the shipping cost?
    • WhoRadley, on 08/03/2008, -1/+10Can someone lend me an iPhone and $4 to get this?
    • BoonTobias, on 08/03/2008, -0/+4If your payment move will make to delay also the adversary, will have lost!
  • skoles, on 08/02/2008, -3/+12Ow, my head.
  • DeadFox1, on 08/02/2008, -1/+45I am any clear about game instructions.
  • mlerner, on 08/02/2008, -8/+90Me fail engrish? That's umpossible.
  • humpdave, on 08/02/2008, -3/+36game this great sounds
  • peaceninja, on 08/02/2008, -1/+18this is what's called a solecistic disaster
    • FluffyArmada, on 08/02/2008, -1/+4Dugg for use of the word solecistic.
    • Virgule, on 08/03/2008, -0/+10solecism |ˈsäləˌsizəm; ˈsō-|
      noun
      a grammatical mistake in speech or writing.
      • a breach of good manners; a piece of incorrect behavior.
      DERIVATIVES
      solecistic |ˌsäləˈsistik; ˌsō-| |ˈsɑləˈsɪstɪk| |ˈsoʊləˈsɪstɪk| |-ˈsɪstɪk| adjective
      ORIGIN mid 16th cent.: from French solécisme, or via Latin from Greek soloikismos, from soloikos ‘speaking incorrectly.’
  • arctic, on 08/02/2008, -6/+22ALL YOUR COMMENTS FAILS US!
    • BossKey, on 08/02/2008, -0/+5wow, that description makes me want to play the game...

      ...main screen turn on!
  • Johnkerry04, on 08/02/2008, -5/+12Does Apple have any quality control over apps whatsoever?
  • joshefosho, on 08/02/2008, -11/+3In Soviet Russia Oxxo plays you!
  • AppleGeorge, on 08/02/2008, -2/+145Seems like the creators are every ***** YouTube comment ever.
  • Ryan0C, on 08/02/2008, -10/+2241. Purposely do a horrible translation in the description of your iPhone app.
    2. If it's bad enough it will get onto the front page of digg, reddit, and every online news site there is.
    3. Free advertising to thousands of iPhone users
    4. Many users will download it out of curiosity.
    5. ?????????
    6. PROFIT!!1
    • AppleGeorge, on 08/02/2008, -0/+65For once that actually works.
    • randoof, on 08/02/2008, -0/+31I'm buying it purely because the description made me laugh out loud. Twice.
    • innovaciones, on 08/03/2008, -8/+35. $3.99 - 30%
      • zippyhat, on 08/03/2008, -0/+2Nobody can know what the ?????? is! NOBODY!! that is the only reason PROFIT! occurs
    • Sawta, on 08/03/2008, -0/+3In this case, the ??? would actually be answered...Many users will download it out of curiosity.
    • BrendanSheehan, on 08/03/2008, -1/+1????????? = charge a price.
  • braveryonions, on 08/02/2008, -1/+96Quote:

    "WHAT"S NEW IN THIS VERSION:
    - Bug fix - Major improvements to IA"
    • GCarden, on 08/02/2008, -0/+40It would seem at least someone's intelligence is artificial...
    • nowisnothing, on 08/03/2008, -0/+60As a former resident of Iowa, I welcome these improvements.
    • theparaiba, on 08/03/2008, -0/+2Major improvement: teaching the intelligenza artificiale to speak Italian.
  • Buzzpatrol, on 08/02/2008, -1/+17I am forward look to play game that is English so that I cant have to get new languages. It was so hard every time when I have to know a new language just to game a new game.
  • AgentMull, on 08/02/2008, -6/+3What?
  • graysilver, on 08/02/2008, -11/+3This is on the front page? An nunintelligible jumble of gunk?
  • seracht, on 08/02/2008, -10/+2Sounds like this written by Miss North Carolina Teen USA

    “I personally believe…that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because…uh…some people in our nation don’t have maps. And…uh…I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa…and uh…the Iraq, everywhere like such as…and I believe that they should…our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S…uh…or should help South Africa and the Asian countries…so we will be able to build up our future…for our [children.]”
    • D3koy, on 08/02/2008, -0/+9SOUTH, She was from SOUTH Carolina... There is a pretty big difference between the two, really, there is...
      • ngmcs8203, on 08/02/2008, -2/+5What is it? The level of racism? The inbreeding levels?
    • seracht, on 08/02/2008, -1/+1crap...
  • WittyBob, on 08/02/2008, -1/+17Thank God this guy doesn't translate in English for Italian-made condoms.
    • Davoidbot, on 08/03/2008, -0/+14It will put to hard tries of contraception.
  • rob2oo4, on 08/02/2008, -6/+2Google translator
    ... obviously they fails
  • totorototoro, on 08/02/2008, -2/+10Maceinstein.com?? No one goes there to read the articles :p

    http://macenstein.com/default/archives/category/ma ...
    • infiniphunk, on 08/03/2008, -0/+5thanks for the link, those pics will be on 4chan in 3..2..1...
    • callmejordy265, on 08/03/2008, -0/+2fapfapfapfapfap
  • agentbob, on 08/02/2008, -13/+2these suck comments
  • NapoleonGold, on 08/02/2008, -0/+7is that real? and if it is then yes free adverts never hurt.

  • LavaWarrior, on 08/02/2008, -3/+17What's new in this version
    -Bug fixes - Major improvement to IA

    They couldn't even spell AI right!! This makes my brain hurt.
    • AppleGeorge, on 08/02/2008, -0/+15Intelligence Artificial!!!!

      Wait, let's throw some random commas in there.

      Intelligence, Artificial,!!!!
    • Virgule, on 08/03/2008, -0/+6Apparently, the author is italian so he meant "Intelligenza Artificiale"
    • ViperDC, on 08/03/2008, -0/+2In Italian (as this appears to originate from), the words are reversed, so it becomes IA. I assume whichever online translator they used doesn't handle abbreviations.
    • innovaciones, on 08/03/2008, -0/+6Iowa
  • mcorto, on 08/02/2008, -0/+7I know the guy who wrote that description. He's in an italian mailing list. I emailed him. He surely didn't expect to get dugg! He said someone offered himself for re-translating the game description...
  • vforvindiesel, on 08/02/2008, -0/+2So Hegel has given up on philosophy and turned to writing game descriptions. I don't see what all the fuss is about.
    • nmcphee, on 08/03/2008, -0/+2"Spirit is Geist. Geist? Geist is Spirit!"
      ***** you Hegel and your ridiculous definitions.
  • suwoo244, on 08/02/2008, -2/+4I know don't you guys talking about. I bought app now just!!
  • ThrillerJesus, on 08/02/2008, -3/+6That's why it's still called Google Translate "Beta."
    • AppleGeorge, on 08/02/2008, -0/+11Every app from Google is in Beta. Gmail is still Beta.
    • mrgermy, on 08/04/2008, -2/+1Every app written should be beta because they are all being constantly improved. . . except for of course Netscape :-(
  • phaxian, on 08/02/2008, -6/+2i can has game for iphone? sweet.
  • 2clone, on 08/02/2008, -0/+29Game so good you played longer time!!
    • mrgermy, on 08/04/2008, -1/+1And it love you long time after win you!
  • MidnightRIder77, on 08/02/2008, -0/+9Rated 4+

    I'm betting the description was written by someone of the minimum age.
  • DesertSquirrel, on 08/02/2008, -1/+5Special Features: Chapter selection
  • piratebr0adcast, on 08/02/2008, -1/+8Is nice! I like! I want to make romance inside of this game! Yegshemesh!
  • zadadka, on 08/02/2008, -0/+18Game code by Chewbacca, Review by Yoda it is.
  • Cashmoney504, on 08/02/2008, -0/+2a nice fun to game that is!
  • RyeBrye, on 08/02/2008, -2/+4Apple claims that they wont let Mozilla port Firefox to the iPhone because it might harm the user experience (i.e. they can't control the quality of the browser)...

    I don't know, I think firefox would at least be as good as this application.
    • trigafinga, on 08/02/2008, -1/+2An accurate reflection of Apple product users' general competence.
  • Istrancis, on 08/02/2008, -4/+1It's bad alright, but not quite as bad as this:

    http://digg.com/extreme_sports/Worst_Danny_Way_Sla ...

    Seeing something like that on the Digg frontpage makes you wonder how it got there.
  • wassim2k, on 08/02/2008, -1/+6meh. I've seen worst Digg post titles and descriptions.
  • Noncentz, on 08/02/2008, -5/+1I must have this game.... quick to the iphone
  • AZTriGuy, on 08/02/2008, -6/+3Engrish, motha-*****, do you speak it?!
  • serverspeed, on 08/02/2008, -6/+1All your base are belong to us!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4AuN6pN1kY
  • auricomnet, on 08/02/2008, -7/+2c-c-c-combo breaker
    • Chalks777, on 08/03/2008, -0/+11that works best when there's... ah never mind, I doubt you'd understand.
  • Typhoon2009, on 08/02/2008, -6/+2So ur with ur honey and yur making out wen the phone rigns. U anser it n the vioce is "wut r u doing wit my daughter?" U tell ur girl n she say "my dad is ded". THEN WHO WAS PHONE?
  • protodon, on 08/03/2008, -0/+1Yeah, they don't do english very well in italia. I speak from experience(s)
  • Fetching more discussions...
    Show 51 - 88 of 88 discussions
  •  

    Login or register to add a comment

    Create a new account or login to join in the conversation on Digg. You'll also be able to Digg stories to help promote things you like.


© Digg Inc. 2008 — Content posted by Digg users is dedicated to the public domain.
DIGG, DIGG IT, DUGG, DIGG THIS, Digg graphics, logos, designs, page headers, button icons, scripts, and other service names are the trademarks of Digg Inc.